


the tainted moon

by ad_meliora101



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arranged Marriage, Badass Zuko (Avatar), Betrayal, Complicated Relationships, Dark, Dark Katara (Avatar), Deception, Dubious Ethics, F/M, Fire Nation (Avatar), Fire Nation Royal Family, Gen, Katara Redemption, Minor Character Death, Morally Grey Zuko, Oblivious Katara, Role Reversal, Sexual Content, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Unreliable Narrator, Water Tribe(s) (Avatar), lovers to enemies to reluctant allies to friends to lovers, questionable life choices
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-18 14:08:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 43,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28993470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ad_meliora101/pseuds/ad_meliora101
Summary: “Are you going to kill me?”The firebender grabs strands of her loose hair and twists the hair between his fingers. “No, you are useful to us.”“And when I’m no longer useful?”A twisted grin splits the young man’s face, his now golden eyes gleaming in the firelight as he gets up to leave. “Katara, why ask questions you already know the answer to?”or: As the Water Tribes conquer the world, Princess Katara is burdened by her past and the sins she has committed. As a punishment, her adopted father, Chief Arnook arranges for her to marry an Earth Kingdom prince. Katara sees this marriage as a means of escape for herself and her pupil, the child Avatar. Too bad her husband has plans of his own.
Relationships: Katara & Zuko (Avatar), Katara/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 243
Kudos: 186





	1. Chapter 1

Katara presses her face into her mother's parka, attempting to drown out the shouts of the men, the banging of the drums, and the chants of the sages as her father battles the chief for his title. The chief is an elder cousin of Hakoda and a master waterbender, few people in the tribe expect Hakoda to be able to defeat him. Katara prays quietly to Tui and La, begging for them to not let her father die. 

There is a loud cry, one that cuts through all the chanting and shouting, then a blanket of silence overtakes the arena. 

Several long moments pass-it feels like hours-before Katara looks up towards her mother and tentatively asks, “Did Daddy win?”

Her mother runs a comforting hand down her braid. “Yes, dear one. Your dad is chief and will lead our people back to greatness, we will no longer lag behind the North.”

As the moon rises high above them, she clutches her mother’s hand as Sokka looks on in glee. Their family stands behind Hakoda as the high sage offers a prayer to the spirits and places the dentalium shell necklace that once belonged to her great-grandfather around Hakoda’s neck. Her father rises, proud and strong, and stands before the people as the tribe bows before him. 

At the celebration, her grandmother beams and tells them with pride that their father is the first non-bending chief the tribe has ever had and won it through strength of mind and body. 

Around the fire their people used to speak of hunting and spirit tales, now they speak of ashmakers and dirt people, raids and spoils, the gods and remaking the world. 

She stands at the dock with Sokka, Gran-Gran, Kya, and the rest of the women and children as the men go off on a campaign. The last large-scale campaign their tribe had participated in was in Hakoda’s youth, the great naval defeat of the Mo Ce Sea when the Caldera dragons all but destroyed their Western fleet.

Her father kisses Gran-Gran and her mother as he sets off before crouching town to hug Katara and Sokka. Katara grips her father tightly as Sokka begs to be allowed to go with the men. Hakoda promises to return with books and games from his patrol of Kyoshi and their other territories in the southern Earth Kingdom coast. 

Their father is gone for years at a time on his patrols, sending back letters that describe the Earth Kingdom and trinkets. Letters that she and Sokka read over and over again each night by the fire before going to sleep and dreaming of green fields and rolling hills. 

* * *

When Katara is eleven, Hakoda and his men return with Chief Arnook and his retinue. The Northern chief looks at their people and tribe with judgmental eyes. 

Katara does not like the man. Chief Arnook speaks too much of his bending, the lavish Northern cities, and his spirit-blessed daughter. Also, she catches his gaze lingering too long on her mother and wishes her father would say something against him. Hakoda never does. 

The Northerners speak with her father and his council long into the night discussing new strategies and goals for their united forces. Chief Arnook speaks of taking down Ba Sing Se, of showing the Earth Kingdom principalities the might and power of their people, of once and for all washing the Earth Kingdom away like a flood. To finally achieve the long-held dreams of their ancestors and create a peaceful and prosperous world. 

With the arctic winds against her face, Katara watches as her father leaves, truly not knowing when or if she will ever see him again. 

* * *

She is fourteen when Hakoda returns from Ba Sing Se, a weakened man. It was a massacre, with only a handful of ships returning. Katara spends hours in the healing hut, tending to the wounded as the sages pray for healing and quick recoveries. 

Hakoda is often silent as he looks off into some distance. Katara can see in his eyes that he has been made weary by war, she hides her disappointment in this well, Sokka does not. 

Hakoda and Sokka argue regularly about the tribe and its future. Sokka pushes their father to train the men harder, to allow him to sit in on council meetings, and to travel North with him. Hakoda acquiesces and Sokka is with him for months on end, traveling back and forth from the North to better develop their strategy. 

One day, she finds Sokka in his room attempting to write haikus. 

Laughingly, she says, “Don’t tell me you found a prissy Northern girl!”

Sokka’s icy blue eyes bore into her as he says, “She’s not prissy! She’s beautiful, kind, and fun to be around. When I’m with her I feel like I can do anything.”

“You sound like you’re in love with her,” she says off-handedly. 

Sokka picks up his brush and firmly states, “That’s because I am.”

* * *

Their entire family accompanies Hakoda on his next trip to the North. She and Gran-Gran walk through the large main square, taking in the splendor of Agna Qel’a. 

She whispers in Gran-Gran’s ear, “How could you leave this place?”

“It is a city but not a community, a tribe but not a people.”

“What does that mean?” 

“You will see.”

And Katara does see, she sees the way the people gather, separated by class and titles, gender and occupation. 

The women to the healing huts, the men to combat classes. 

Katara stands in the great hall of the North Pole as Sokka kneels before Princess Yue and presents her with Gran-Gran’s betrothal necklace. Yue’s blue eyes sparkle as she lifts her hair for him to tie the necklace around her throat. 

They stand side by side as a sage seals the engagement in the old tongue. 

At the opulent engagement celebration, Katara sips ice wine and takes in her family situation. She looks over at her father, sitting silently while her mother whispers to Chief Arnook and Sokka jokes in Yue’s ear. Her brother will be half-a-world away from her while her father is away from them in mind but not body. She gets up, resolving to take her mind off of these things and dances with several young men under the radiant moonlight.

* * *

She is sixteen when Hakoda and Sokka leave to stop a rebellion in the Southern coast. Hakoda looks at her with tired eyes and pulls her into a tight hug, a hug so full of love that she can feel the warmth after they break apart. He kisses her forehead along with Kya and Gran-Gran’s promising to bring back Earth Kingdom silks and jade bracelets. As she watches the fleet fade off into a distance, a small and scared part of her fears that hug, that warm and special hug, was the last one she will ever receive from her father. 

She is right.

* * *

Katara hardly remembers the funeral, the pain and hurt was so great that it exists as a fog in her mind. She only clearly remembers what happened immediately afterwards. 

She finds Sokka sitting in some far-off spot, looking up towards the heavens. 

Before she can even approach him, he declares, “Arnook killed Dad.”

Katara furrows her brow and wipes the tears pooling into her eyes. “Sokka, what are you saying?”

Her brother speaks with a conviction in his voice that she has never heard before and says, “It was an ambush, Katara. The way General Fong's auxiliary forces found us, it just felt too clean, too neat.”

Katara clenches her jaw and harshly says, “Sokka, what you are accusing Chief Arnook of is treason. You can’t tell anyone this. You don’t have proof and I don’t even see how you will find proof.”

Sokka stands and looks down at her, “I’ll find proof, there’s always a trail.”

Before she can even reply, her brother pushes past her, walking further away from the city, out into the wind. 

* * *

It is almost a year later when Kya comes into their home, clutching a letter from the North. 

Katara is standing over the fire, stirring a pot of five flavor soup as Gran-Gran mends Sokka’s pants. 

Kya clears her throat and looks at them with clear eyes. “Chief Arnook asked for my hand in marriage. He wants to adopt you and Sokka.”

Katara drops the ladle into the bowl of soup. “What about Sokka's engagement to Yue! If he adopts us then we will be his children, then Sokka can’t…”

Kya interrupts her, “Yes, Katara. If I accept, Sokka cannot marry Yue.”

Katara crosses her arms and pleads, “Then don’t accept! You can’t do this to Sokka.” 

Kya and Gran-Gran look at each other for a moment and Katara cannot decipher what the look is meant to convey. In a firm voice, her mother states, “I am doing this for Sokka. I am doing this for the well-being of the entire tribe.”

“No, Mom. It sounds like you are doing this for yourself. You can’t handle being alone! You think I never noticed the way Arnook would look at you, sometimes even right in front of Dad! Well the whole tribe noticed! You probably were planning this from the day after Dad’s funeral!”

Gran-Gran rises and tightly grabs onto Katara’s arm, “Katara! Enough! You will apologize to your mother, she is trying to make the best of things as should you.”

Katara half-shouts, “What about Sokka, how will he make the best of things?”

Gran-Gran sighs and in a harsh whisper says, “Sokka is not going to marry Yue. Did you think your brother could wander around the Earth Kingdom in taverns and bars asking if Arnook planned your father’s murder and have the Chief not hear about it? Do you not hear what the people are saying now? They say the spirits turned on us, a non-bender chief with a mad non-bender son. Our family has no status here anymore. With Chief Arnook’s backing, maybe Sokka can be a colonial governor but Sokka will never rule both tribes. Do you understand?”

Katara takes her arm out of Gran-Gran’s grasp, “Yes, I do understand,” before walking out of their igloo.

* * *

With a neutral gaze, Katara observes Kya and Chief Arnook playing with her brother, Kanaaq. The boy is three years old and already showing signs of strong waterbending. She can’t help but feel like her mother views the child as a better version of Sokka. 

Kya looks at Katara from across the room and smiles, “Katara, come play with your brother!”

Katara frowns slightly, “I can’t. I promised Sokka that I would meet him for lunch.”

Kya sits the boy in her lap and pushes stray hairs behind her ear, “Alright, dear. Tell him I said hello.”

Katara walks through the busy streets of Agna Qel’a and reaches the port administration office, walking up a long corridor into Sokka’s office. His office is messy with the various surfaces covered in scrolls, books, and charts from across the world. 

Her brother is charting a log and she clears her throat, causing him to look up at her with a smile that does not meet his eyes. He is still pained by their mother's actions, she can tell. He avoids Yue and her husband Hahn like they were a plague. He is distant towards their mother and brother and she cannot blame him. He prefers to spend time in his office, training, or their Gran-Gran's home with Master Pakku. 

“I brought us tentacle soup.”

Over lunch, Katara shares a new discovery. “Sokka, I went to the temple.”

“Oh, no this can’t be good.”

“Look, it is. The sages, they believe the Avatar will return. They prophesied that he is within our shores.”

“Katara, the Avatar has been missing for almost 100 years!”

“You think I don’t know that?” Katara reaches over and squeezes Sokka’s hand. “Together, we’ll find him and may Tui and La damn anyone that ever spoke out against you. You’ll gain your status back, I know it.”

She and Sokka go out into the ice, searching for signs of the Avatar. They do this for weeks, coming back home tired and out of ideas. 

One day, Chief Arnook approaches her in the hallway in front of her room. 

"Hello, my daughter."

Coolly, she replies, "Hello, Chief Arnook."

The older man frowns slightly at her address but says, "Katara, there is a woman, an elder, one that I believe you know. She says her name is Master Hama and she escaped capture from our enemies."

Katara takes a deep breath, "Master Hama?"

Arnook nods slightly, "Yes, she said she was your childhood master and would like to see you, if possible."

"Where is she staying?"

* * *

Over bowls of sea prune stew, Katara blinks back tears as Master Hama shares the horror of her time in captivity. 

Pleadingly, the young woman looks at the aged master, "I want you to teach me, the technique you used to escape."

Hama narrows her icy eyes at Katara, "This technique is not for everyone. Few have the strength and power necessary to do it."

Katara reaches over and touches Hama's aged hand, "Master Hama, I wish to learn. I am a master but there is so much I do not know. Our enemies, they are violent and dangerous, we must defeat them in order to create this world anew."

A grin appears on Hama's face, "Meet me tomorrow night at dusk."

* * *

After weeks of training with Hama, Katara walks under a bright full moon with Master Hama and Chief Arnook deep into the great prison of Agna Qel'a.

The usher her into a room with a man in tattered green clothing, covered in bruises. The man looks up at them through matted hair and with wild eyes spits, "I won't tell you snow savages anything!"

Under the flickering firelight, she turns towards Hama and hesitantly asks, "Who is this?"

A dark smile appears on Arnook's face. "Katara, this man knows the location of General Fong, the man who murdered your father."

Katara's heart clenches and she looks at the man with hard eyes. "What is this meant to be?"

Hama places a hand on Katara's shoulder, "This is your final exam."

Katara snarls at him, "I'll give you one chance, where is Fong?"

The man chokes out, "Damn you to Koh's lair, you pathetic heathen! Murderers and dark spirits, all of you!"

Katara closes her eyes and reaches out towards his blood causing his limbs to bend and twist as he cries out. 

She keeps going and going until he is half-dead and whimpers out the location.

Later, she stands at Hama's side watching as the cold sunlight overtakes the city. 

"Am I evil?" she whispers. 

Hama looks out at the sea and says, "No, Katara. You are brave, the bravest among us. You are willing to do what needs to be done to establish peace and wealth for all the nations. When we rule this world, there will be no more suffering and pain. Water is life, Katara. Water heals. Through strength we are healing and cleansing this world."

Katara lets out a soft breath, "Good because I liked it."

* * *

Sitting on his grand throne, Chief Arnook looks down at her with interested eyes. "My daughter, why have you asked to see me?"

Katara raises her head as she kneels before him. "Father," she begins hesitantly, swallowing the bile that threatens to rise at calling him that term. "I wish to serve our people, to fight for our tribe and family."

A smile cuts across his face, "Good, my daughter. May Tui and La bless you for your giving heart and spirit."

Calmly, Katara says, "I ask for one thing. I ask for Sokka to be allowed to accompany me so that he may find favor in your eyes."

Arnook huffs, "Daughter, your brother is no bender, he is barely a warrior. He prefers to spend his time tinkering away instead of learning how to be a leader."

"His inventions have aided our people on the battlefield. He has done more-" Katara stops herself before she ruins this for Sokka. Changing her approach, she softly says, "Please, Father, all Sokka needs is a chance to prove himself. I know that he will not disappoint you."

Arnook cups his chin and says, "Fine, your brother will be allowed to accompany you. You will take the 12th division, Master Hama will also be at your side to serve as an advisor."

Katara bows again, "Thank you, we will bring glory and pride to our people."

* * *

With Sokka and Hama at her side, they crush rebellions in Kyoshi and regain territories that they have lost over the years. 

Katara finds herself governed by the full moon, waiting until she can feel its power in her veins. 

She doesn't know how many people she has killed, how many men and women she has torn apart from the inside out. 

The warriors call her Katara the Sea Wolf, if Sokka feels slighted that the men gave Katara their father's old title, he does not say. 

Their enemies call her other things: the Puppetmaster, the Blue Demon, the Blood Princess. 

She accepts them all, caring little for such things. She only lives for the fear in the eyes and hearts of her enemies as she watches the light die out in them. 

Katara knows there is something wrong with her. One can kill for country, for glory, but it should not bring such personal joy. 

One night, restlessly she travels alone to Makapu to speak to a fortune teller. 

They sit across from each other as the old woman begins, "Your name shall live on for generations."

Katara tilts her body back and rolls her eyes, "I know that already."

The old woman raises a delicate eyebrow and continues reading the bones. Gasping, she whispers, "You will go through a great struggle, one that will test your mind, body, and spirit. You have two paths ahead of you, both intertwined with the very fate of this world. One path involves an empire and the other involves love."

"Love?"

Aunt Wu narrows her eyes at her, "Yes, love. You will love someone deeply, more than you ever thought possible but..."

"But what?"

"That love is not guaranteed."

With a scowl, Katara states, "Nothing ever is."

* * *

As the siege is about to begin, Katara poses as a refugee named _Hualing_ and enters Omashu with an elite group of benders amongst the flood of refugees. 

She tries to keep her eyes off of the refugees. She cannot get distracted by the frostbite injuries, the unmarried women with blue-eyed babies, and the overall air of sadness. 

Katara closes her eyes and reminds herself that once the war is finished, these people will be welcomed as fellow citizens and the wealth of her people shall be shared with them. 

They wait under the cover of night, sneaking into the palace, killing and disarming King Bumi's guards until they reach his bedchamber. 

She rushes into the chamber and concentrates on his heart. She clenches her jaw as the old king cries out until he makes no more sounds. 

Under the rising sun, the warriors enter into the open gates and Katara sits on Bumi's throne, claiming Omashu for the Water Tribes. 

* * *

Katara pushes past the crowds of nobles at her return celebration and walks out into city streets.

She finds Sokka by candlelight in the royal library, looking through stolen Air Nomad scrolls. 

"Sokka, come to the party. There's great food and dancing. Nutha was asking for you."

The warrior pinches his brow and says, "I just figured it out. I think I know where the Avatar is."

The waterbender lets out a sigh and crosses her arms, "Where?"

"The sages... I think they were right, we forgot something. We forgot about home, the South Pole."

* * *

Katara expects the Avatar to be a trained warrior, a master of all the four elements. 

When she opens his ice encasement, she and Sokka are more than ready to disarm him. 

To their great shock, the Avatar is a twelve year old boy, a boy that takes to her and Sokka like an artic seal to water. 

They go penguin sledding with him, watch him perform tricks for the southern children, and tell him spirit tales as he falls asleep. 

Aang is a talented student but one that is easily distracted, she often has to refocus him on their lessons and give him small rewards as he progresses in his training. 

Being around Aang, Katara feels something changing in her. She begins to rediscover the purity of waterbending, the small joys of life. Water can soothe, water can comfort. Water doesn't have to destroy or take away. Water changes. And since water changes, maybe she can too. 

One night, after Aang has fallen asleep, Katara shakes Sokka awake. 

Grumbling, her brother follows her outside and they whisper into the night air. 

"Is what we are doing wrong?" 

"We are protecting him, Katara. Not just from the world but from Arnook. If you tell Aang the truth and Arnook finds out, he'll..."

"I know, he'll take him away from us. Keep him locked in the palace."

Sokka grabs her arms, his sky-blue eyes meeting her ocean-blue eyes. Solemnly, he says, "He'll kill him. Katara, the next Avatar will be a waterbender, if for a moment, even a single moment Arnook thinks Aang is not worth the trouble, he'll get rid of him."

Katara licks her dry lips and hoarsely asks, "What can we do?"

Sokka bites his lip and begins to look past her. "End this war, break the Fire Nation and the Earth Kingdom so Aang doesn't have to."

* * *

On their boat back towards the North, Katara is haunted. Each night as she drifts off she is visited by the sights, smells, and sounds of her killings. She sees the faces of those whose lives she ended, the families she has torn apart. The Fire Nation soldiers, the Earth Kingdom captains, even King Bumi. 

By the time they arrive in the North, she bears dark half-circles under her eyes and her usually neat braid is tangled. 

Master Pakku meets with her in his home and pours her oolong tea. 

"Your grandmother has told me you are not sleeping."

Katara looks into the tea, taking in the scent. "I am not. All I see is the things that I've done. I can't bear it anymore. I don't want this life."

Pakku plainly says, "Then make a new one. Change yourself as water changes itself."

"I don't know how to."

Pakku’s lips curl upwards, "I think you do."

* * *

The waterbender's eyes flutter open and she sees her grandmother, step-grandfather, and brother crowded around her.

Gran-Gran whispers a prayer of thanks in the old tongue as Sokka pushes Katara's damp hair off her brow. 

Pakku looks at them with dark eyes and whispers, "May I speak to Katara alone?"

Gran-Gran nods and she ushers Sokka out of the room. 

Pakku narrows his eyes at her and half-growls, "When I told you to make a new life, I didn't mean for you to try to end this one!"

Katara slowly sits up and reaches for the cup of water near the bed. 

Pakku continues, "Are you mad? You must be! Why would you ever think to speak out against Chief Arnook in front of court then challenge him to a duel! He could have killed you!"

Katara gives Pakku a soft smirk, "But he didn't."

Pakku pinches his brow, "He still can. He asked to speak to you as soon as you awakened."

* * *

Katara kneels before Chief Arnook, despite the lingering pain in her side and middle. 

Her eyes glance around the throne room at the various pools and waterfalls as the water moves to match the tension in Chief Arnook's body. 

"Raise your head, woman."

Katara raises her head and fights to maintain a neutral expression on her face. 

"I've never told you this before but I love you."

Katara's eyes widen slightly but she keeps the muscles in her face relaxed. 

"I love you so much that I treated you as if you were my own son. Do you know what I was prepared to do for you? I was prepared to allow you and your husband to rule after me until your brother was of age to rule our people."

Katara lets out a soft gasp. _He would have picked me over Yue and Hahn?_

Almost as if he could read her mind, he continues, "Yes, I would have put you above Yue because I saw you as a son. But because I love you, I realize that I've failed you. You are not a son, you will never be a son, you are a daughter. A woman who should be living as a woman."

She bites her tongue so hard that she tastes blood as she fights to remain still. 

Chief Arnook gets down off his throne and walks down the steps to approach her. He signals for her to rise and he places a large hand on her shoulder. 

"Katara, my daughter, you are banished from court. You will never hold a leadership position in the tribe again. You will never fight in battle again. I am marrying you to a dirt prince; you will rule Omashu with him and never leave the city. I pray your children will never feel the call of water." And he leans towards her and presses a kiss to her forehead, "It is only because I love you that I did not rip the very life out of you. Be grateful."

* * *

After her attendants had placed her belongings on board and Aang is comfortable with Appa, Katara and Sokka stand on deck before she leaves for her exile in the South Pole. She pushes a curl behind her ear as Sokka whispers, "You are insane, you have to be."

Katara throws her head back before turning fully to him. "I'm not, Sokka. I'm not."

"You are going to marry some dirt peasant and give birth to his blockhead children and you don't even care. So yeah, I think you are insane." 

Letting out a soft sigh, she says, "Don't you see? I'm still able to protect Aang. Arnook has arranged for him to be taught earthbending in Omashu." Grabbing onto Sokka's parka, she whispers, "The plan can still work. I'll protect Aang while you work on ending the war before the Great Comet comes."

Sokka rubs the back of his neck, "That's not much a plan, Katara. That's a dream."

A smile cuts through her face, "I thought you were the planner in this family, so get to planning."

Before Sokka can reply, he notices the guards escorting a tall prisoner in grey rags onto the ship. 

"Who is that?" Sokka exclaims. 

One of the younger guards turns towards them, "Your highnesses meet Prince Ozai of the Fire Nation, brother of Fire Lord Iroh and defender of Ba Sing Se."

The man looks directly at them and smirks. 

A grimace appears on Sokka's face. "I don't want that dirty fire breather on the same ship as my sister!"

Another guard shrugs his shoulders, "Chief Arnook assigned him on this ship, this is the last ship going southward until next month."

Katara places a hand on Sokka's elbow, "Brother, are you forgetting something? Water kills fire."

* * *

The waterbender carries a tea set down into the deepest, darkest part of the ship. 

Katara sends the five guards further away from the cell and slides the cup of green tea and tin of kale cookies between the bars. 

"Prince Ozai, good afternoon. I've brought you some tea and kale cookies."

Ozai stands up off his cot and narrows his golden eyes at Katara. His eyes always startle her, they are too light, not the amber or brown she is used to from Fire Nation people. 

He drinks the tea before moving a hand up towards his cropped hair then quickly returning his hand to his side. 

She bites her lip, the guards had told her he once had long dark hair, hair that they cut to shame him, knowing that it was sacred in his culture. 

“It’s a tragedy," he rasps. 

“What is?” Katara queries as she sips her tea. 

“That you were born in the wrong nation, girl.”

“I could say the same to you.”

"No, you couldn't." 

* * *

Katara stands in her finest furs at the dock in the South Pole, awaiting her betrothed's arrival under a cloudless sky. 

An unassuming boat enters the dock and a pale young man exits the boat, his head bowed, as he is flanked by two Kyoshi Warrior guards, the two women approaching with neutral painted faces. 

Prince Cheng approaches and bows, she returns it. 

"I hope you had a pleasant journey, your highness. Welcome to Harbor City."

He raises his head to meet her gaze. He is handsome with sharp features, dark black hair, and piercing green eyes. _His eyes_ , in all her travels she has never seen anyone with eyes that shade before; Katara has to force herself to not stare into them. 

In a hoarse whisper, the prince replies, "Thank you, your highness. I am glad to be here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter wasn't too confusing and if anyone has any questions please ask and I will try to answer them as best as I can (without giving too much away about the future). I think it should be clear from the tags who Katara's husband really is, lol. 
> 
> I don't have a regular update schedule for this fic, it was just an idea that popped into my head. Thanks.


	2. Chapter 2

Far from the city, in her modest but homely igloo, they eat steamed dumplings and make polite talk. Katara finds her betrothed to be well-mannered and intelligent but somewhat uncommunicative. She was told very little about him: his age, name, and that he is a distant relation of King Bumi. She was also told that the court of Omashu initiated the marriage as a sign of submission to tribal rule. Prince Cheng answers her questions using very simple and direct terms, never offering her more than what he deems necessary. 

She would think he fears her, but she does not see it in his posture or his gaze. Perhaps, he is like Bato, a dear friend of her father, who used words carefully and sparingly. They have only just met but she wishes for him to be comfortable around her, for them to know each other. 

There is an undercurrent of fierceness in him, one that she sensed immediately. From the sharpness and intensity in his eyes, she can tell that he has seen battle. Perhaps that is the cause of his frosty behavior, he has either fought against her on the battlefield or heard the many tales of her acts.

_(The Blood Princess)_

Before she did not care for such titles, accepting that due to her prowess in battle she would garner infamy. Now, she wishes her entire past could be washed away. But blood is not like dirt or rust, blood always carries. 

She meets Cheng's eyes and thinks on what she must do to have any hope of gaining his trust and eventually his aid in protecting Aang. Gently, she begins, “I know this is difficult for you, being made to wed a stranger from an enemy nation. Not just any stranger but the _Blood Princess_ , who conquered the very city you call home.” She looks at him with an open gaze, “I know this may be of little comfort to you, but we will be living and ruling Omashu, far from the inner-workings of this nation. I plan to rule jointly with you and take your counsel regarding the needs and wants of the people, your people.”

He takes a sip of his tea before setting it down on the table. Smoothly, he replies, “Your highness, I am proud to be strengthening the bonds between our two peoples and solidifying Omashu’s position as the greatest of the colonial holdings. Though I know that your people will one day rule Ba Sing Se and Caldera.”

With a slightly pinched brow and some hesitance, Katara says, “You don’t have to speak like that to me, not when we are alone.”

“How do you wish for me to speak to you?”

“With honesty, I hope.”

“Not all of us have the privilege of being honest, Princess Katara.”

“With me you do,” she insists. 

Just as he is about to reply, she hears Aang’s voice from outside the igloo. “Katara! I have to show you something, but the Kyoshi Warriors won’t let me inside.”

She looks over at Cheng and excuses herself momentarily as she walks through the doorway. 

The Avatar looks up at her with a bright smile, showing her a skinned elbow. “Katara, I fell while I was racing with some of the other kids.”

“Oh! Aang do you want me to heal it?” She asks as she leans towards him to inspect the injury. 

“No! Watch!” Aang exclaims as he bends water out of his pouch and heals himself. 

Katara sucks in her breath, somewhat nervous about what Cheng might say around the obviously Air Nomad boy. Air Nomad descendants rarely wander the world, most have taken refuge in either Ba Sing Se or the Fire Nation. “Wow! You can heal now,” as she attempts to direct Aang away from her igloo. 

Aang’s bright eyes widen as he notices Cheng standing in Katara’s doorway. “Hi, I’m Aang and you are going to be Katara’s husband, right? 

Cheng leans his foot back against the doorway, “Yes, I will be.”

“What’s your name?”

With a glint in his eye, Cheng approaches Aang and roots his body in place. “I’m Cheng and you are an Air Nomad.”

Aang tilts his head and says, “I’m not just that, I’m the Avatar. Do you know any airbenders? No one from around here does.” 

The prince peers into Katara’s eyes for a moment before turning back towards the Avatar, responding, “I’ve met some in my travels.”

Aang's grin widens, “Really?"

Cheng gives a slight nod and Aang asks, "Do you two want to go penguin sledding with me?”

* * *

With the sharp wind in her face, Katara rides down the hill, looking back to see Cheng close behind her. The waterbender sets her eyes ahead of her towards the next slope when she hears a crash. Turning her head quickly, she sees that Cheng has fallen off his penguin into the snow. 

Katara and Aang rush back up the hill to find Cheng brushing snow out of his shoulder-length hair, now loose around him. 

Earlier, she thought him handsome but now seeing him with a slight pout on his lips and his black hair flowing around him, he is much more than that, he’s _beautiful_. 

The waterbender feels something soft and warm fluttering in her heart. And it sinks into her that this is the very feeling she thought she would never feel for anyone. 

But she will not put a name to it, for naming it would allow it to grow until it overtakes her like the wild and open sea. 

However, she does not try to fight against the flutter, letting it continue to warm her from the inside out. 

* * *

“Do your guards have to follow us everywhere?” Katara questions as they walk through the open-air market. 

Cheng swallows his seal jerky before asking, "Why? Do you not like them?"

Katara turns back towards the guards who are a respectful distance away; the glossy-haired guard wears a bored expression as she catches Katara's gaze before turning her eyes straight ahead while the brown-haired guard seems to be taking in the lively atmosphere. 

The princess stammers, "No! I mean, they don't speak, at all and I just realized I don't even know their names. What are they?"

Cheng blinks several times and tilts his head slightly. "Their names...you wish to know their names?"

"Yes, I do."

He rubs the back of his neck as Katara stares at him intently. "Oh, well...their names. It's funny that you ask that, um, because I didn't expect you to, at all. The guard with black hair, her name is actually _Kwa Mai_ and the bubbly one, her name is, uh, _Tai_."

Katara looks back towards their painted faces and catalogues their names in her mind so she does not forget them. 

With a smile, she says, "Tell them to stay behind."

"What?"

"Tell them."

Cheng turns back towards the guards and raises his hand, signaling for them to stay behind as he and Katara walk further into town. 

Hesitantly, he asks, "So where are you taking me?"

She looks at him with clear eyes, "Why? Are you afraid I'm going to hurt you?"

Stammering, he replies, "Uh..I..no!" Then in a softer tone of voice, he adds, "I just want to know."

Katara searches his eyes to determine if he is lying to her. Once she is satisfied, she says, "I'm taking you the Ice Sculpture Garden of Heroes."

* * *

They walk under the flurries of snow as she points out the various sculptures to him. They reach a statue and stop in front of it as Katara lets out a gentle sigh. 

"Who is that?" Cheng asks as he eyes the detailed sculpture. 

"My dad," Katara replies softly. "This war ruined him as it has ruined so many."

 _I will not let it ruin Aang,_ she thinks. 

With a firm voice, the waterbender declares, "But it will end in our time."

 _His eyes_ , they look ablaze as his gaze trails over her, "It will."

Before she can even question him, he walks away, and she watches the snow crush under his feet. 

* * *

Due to her banishment, she is not allowed to participate in many aspects of communal life. She cannot enter the large meeting house, she is made to visit the temple in the early hours of the morning, she is not allowed to teach waterbending, and she can only assist in the healing center. 

Katara does not mind, she will leave this place soon. Her new life shall be across the sea and she waits for it as a waterbender awaits a full moon. 

Near her isolated igloo, she teaches Cheng how to hunt for seals and whale-walrus. They go out in her father's old kayak and fish for hours in quiet silence. 

Under the blue-black sky, she and Aang huddle under a large blanket as Cheng sits across the fire. 

Katara recounts to them tales of shapeshifters that live in the forest, only recognizable by their bright red eyes. Then, Aang shares with them an air nomad legend about the white lions that once lived near the temples in ancient times. Then to her great surprise, Cheng smiles as he tells them of the water spirit that sank a great city into the sea. 

In awe, she murmurs, “Your story was very similar to a tale of my people.”

Cheng mutters, “Well, our peoples all walk this same world. We are bound to share some things.”

That night wrapped tightly in her furs, Katara dreams of a child with her eyes and the same smile Cheng wore as he spoke around the fire. 

* * *

The ice slushes under Katara's feet as she runs towards the gathering crowd of people. She elbows her way through them to find Sangok arguing with Cheng. The prince's mouth is pulled tightly as the man makes exaggerated gestures. 

"What is going on?" Katara demands with hard eyes. 

The waterbender looks at her and through a clenched jaw growls, "Your dirt peasant refuses to give an offering to our war gods as all men of this tribe must do."

Katara crosses her arms and hisses, "He is not a man of this tribe, now leave him be."

With a smirk, Sangok utters, "You are right, banished one. Now take your war prize and go."

Baring her teeth, she gathers a water whip to slap Sangok when she feels a firm grip on her wrist. It is Cheng and he begins to half-drag her away from the crowd. 

"Unhand me! Did you not hear him? He insulted you!" she shouts as Cheng continues pulling her out of the city towards her igloo. 

She continues to yell at him as the bitter air hits their cheeks. 

Cheng places her in front of the door to her igloo and looks down at her with a clenched jaw. He rasps, "Let it go. Let it go."

She is about to push past him and walk back into the city to find Sangok but something in the green sea of his eyes calms her. 

Katara turns and walks into her igloo, leaving Cheng out in the snow. 

With her heart in her throat, she waits, wondering if he will come in after her. 

He does not and she lets out a breath, unsure if it is out of disappointment or relief. 

* * *

Katara feels the chill against her cheeks as she sits next to Cheng in the governor's office. 

Governor Silla lifts his glass of ice-wine with his aged hand. He is a rough man, a ruthless warrior born of a Northern noble family. She has no idea how old he truly is, just that he spent almost the entirety of his life conquering territory and running prison camps in the Earth Kingdom. He is also one of Chief Arnook's closest allies and therefore an enemy of Katara's. 

He peers at them with crystalline eyes before beginning, "Clanless one, this is your betrothed?"

Rage pulses through her veins as she half-hisses, "Yes."

"He looks almost too pretty to be a man. Let alone to have been on the battlefield. What is the most significant battle he has fought in?"

"Sir, I can speak for myself. I've fought..."

"Was I speaking to you, dirt boy? Your wife is clanless, you have no voice here." Shifting his eyes towards Katara he barks, "Clanless one, tell your betrothed to hold his tongue lest I remove it."

Katara places a gentle hand on Cheng's knee and squeezes it. "He told me he fought in the grasslands with the Caldera dragons."

Silla cups his chin. "Boy, you've fought with the demons from across the seas? So you know of the one they called the Dragon Prince, the only dragon-rider of this age. He fought with both swords and flames."

Katara looks at Cheng and he nods slightly. "Yes, he knows of him." 

Governor Silla continues, "Chief Arnook sent an assassin after him last spring, the man chased the fire breather into the desert. No one has seen him on the battlefield since. And we have his father rotting in our prison cells. We just need the heads of the Fire Lord, his son, and his niece to be done with that loathsome family."

Bluntly, Katara asks, "Why are we here?"

Silla lets out a deep belly laugh, "You have no patience! Just like your blood father when we captured the Zeizhou Province together."

 _My father didn't fight in Zeizhou? He has him confused with Arnook,_ she thinks. 

Katara furrows her brow, "Governor, that was Chief Arnook who fought there. My father is Hakoda the Sea Wolf."

Silla lets out a cough, "Oh yes, of course. I meant your _bond_ father." Quickly, he says, "Rise, Katara. I will hand you a spear for the marriage hunt."

Katara feels a chill go deep to her bones and she chokes, "No, what are you doing? You must hand him the spear."

Silla shifts his head towards Cheng and sneers. "He is not a man, he is a war prize."

Katara lunges at the governor and slaps him. "Don't ever speak of him like that again!"

Silla narrows his eyes at her, "There is nothing I wish to do more than to take your dirt prince and thrash him severely. Insult our ways again and I will." Pushing the spear into her hand, he barks, "Now go!"

Her stomach twists in fury as she runs out of the governor's office, too ashamed to even look at Cheng. 

She spends the rest of the day trudging through the snow to stalk her prey, a large yak. When Katara kills the yak and begins to skin it, she cries. 

In the soft light of the grey-blue sky, Katara hauls the furs back to the city and the crowd gathered by the main gate. 

Tradition dictates that the people watch the man hand the furs to his bride. Her hands tremble and she bites her lip so hard that it bleeds as she hands the furs to Cheng. 

She half-hopes that he will throw the furs on the ice and call them barbarians, savages, and heathens but he gently takes the furs from her and walks with his guards back towards his quarters. 

* * *

Katara follows after him, waves of fury running through her. He nods at his guards and they allow Katara to follow him into his room. 

Grabbing Cheng's arm, Katara hisses, "This is not our way, don't you see they mean to shame you? You were not a man to them and now you will never be."

He swats her hand away and flops on a cushion to sew their wedding furs. "Then damn your ways. What is shame if you do not feel it?"

She feels hot and dizzy as the anger nearly suffocates her. 

The prince continues sewing as if she wasn't there and that hurts her so deeply that all her anger shifts to him. Katara tries to wrestle the furs out of his grasp, but he is stronger, much stronger, than she expected.

Embarrassed, she lets go of the furs and looks at him with hard eyes. Katara resolves to say things that she no longer believes in, just to hurt him, to make him feel something, to make her not be alone in her shame. And a part of her just wants to see how intense his eyes become with anger in his heart and a snarl at his lips. “You are pathetic! Your whole people are nothing! No wonder we’ve conquered you!"

Cheng lets out a sigh and drops the bone needle and thread. "They did not tell me I was getting an ill-tempered child for a wife. I'm not surprised you do not know how to pick your battles considering your people see this entire world as one."

She huffs and gets into his face. "Well, I did not know I was getting an honor less coward for a husband."

He growls, "Your people know nothing of honor, only pride." She nearly gasps because she sees it, that flicker of anger that she wanted, craved so desperately. She holds her breath, waiting for it to grow and overtake him but the spark just dies in his eyes. "Now leave me," he demands harshly. 

"Leave you?" Katara exclaims in disbelief. 

He adjusts the furs in his lap and picks up the needle and thread. "Yes, you are in my quarters so leave."

"You cannot order me; I am above you." Katara chokes out, annoyed at how close that sounded to a whine. 

"In what way?" Cheng scoffs. "You are banished, you presently have no role in this community or in any other."

Katara replies in a low tone, "Did you forget who I am?"

He studies her and dispassionately states, "I know who you are. You, Katara, are a woman who has spent so much time killing people that you’ve forgotten how to live with them."

Weakly, she offers, “I can hurt you.”

Firmly, Cheng retorts, "Fine, hurt me. Then what?” In a softer voice, he adds, “You'll still be alone."

Katara rushes out of his room and feels the ice cutting under her feet as she runs to Elder Yura's house. 

* * *

Elder Yura is a relative of Katara's mother, a member of one of the great warrior clans of the South Pole. As a child, Katara would often assist her with designing the costumes for the festival performers. She is now one of the few people in the tribe who has not totally shunned Katara. 

Katara sits between Yura's legs as the older woman braids her hair.

"He will not want you if you are unkind to him," Yura asserts with sympathy in her voice. 

The waterbender feels sweat begin to pool at her brow. "Why would I want him to want me?"

"Because you want him," Yura replies as she continues braiding down Katara's head. 

"I don't," she rasps. 

"Then why do you always watch him with hungry eyes? Looking at the man like you’ve been lost at sea for an age and he is the shore.” 

Katara rubs her temple. "I watch him because he's odd and I want to understand him. His skin is so pale that he should look sickly but he doesn't, instead he almost glows. His eyes look like, I can't even begin to describe them..."

Yura finishes the braid and pinches Katara’s cheek. "Dear one, why can you not see that you love your dirt prince?” 

"Don't call him that!" Katara quickly turns to face Yura, "He has a name, it's Cheng. I-I don’t care for him that way, that's strange. I’ve just met him."

“Sometimes love rushes into our hearts like a flood, dear.”

* * *

Cheng runs his slender finger over the ridges of the bone knife, admiring the craftsmanship. "What is this?" 

Katara avoids his gaze and says, "It used to belong to my father."

The young man lets out a soft breath, "You've never apologized before have you?"

Defensively, Katara insists, "I have!" She lowers the tone of her voice to a half-whisper, "I just always seem to say the wrong things to you but I don't mean to. I just want to make you comfortable." _(and happy)_

He gives her a soft half-smile, "Make me comfortable? It sounds like you are starting to like me."

"I don't like you!" _I love you_ , a strange and small voice inside her shouts, a voice that she quickly quiets.

He shakes his head slightly and places the knife at his hip next to his pearl-dagger. "Thank you very much, Katara. I really appreciate the gift." He bites his lip, "I have to go to the temple; the sages will be teaching me the ancient vows."

"Wait! I'll walk you there," Katara blurts out. 

The prince rises and simply utters, "You don't have to escort me. I'll have my guards with me."

"But I want to," Katara maintains. 

Cheng raises an eyebrow but doesn't say anything further, holding out his arm so Katara could grasp it. 

* * *

It is half-terrifying when Katara realizes she has truly fallen in love with her betrothed. 

This realization is made almost heartbreaking by the fact that he is doing no great act at that moment, not conquering territory, or fighting a challenge duel but sitting, nestled in her small igloo teaching Aang to play the pipa. 

The soft candlelight catches his features and it sets her heart aflame.

Katara feels deep in her bones that she would die for him but what she truly wants is to live for him. And with that fact confirmed in her heart, the waterbender knows what she must do. 

She grabs Cheng's hand and takes him out of her igloo, noting the flicker of emotion in the face of Kwa Mai. Katara will ask him later why the guard seems so protective over him. But now is not the time for such questions.

As ribbons of moonlight fall around them, she is captivated by his intense eyes. 

"If we are going to build a life together," she says, looking up at him. "I need to trust you with my secrets. Aang doesn’t know anything about the war, not really. My brother and I, we've been lying to him to protect him. We are working to end this war before Aang is made to hurt people." Cupping his cheek, she says, “Once my people win this war, you and I can lead this world anew.”

His expression is one she does not quite recognize, but he does not push her away when she embraces him. She holds him tightly, elated that there are no more secrets between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing awkward angry pining Katara. Also you have Cheng (Zuko) and his Kyoshi Warrior guards (Mai and Ty Lee) gathering information about Katara, Aang, and the tribe while trying to not get caught or raise suspicion. I hope this chapter isn't too confusing but please feel free to ask any questions. Thank you all for the comments, kudos, and hits :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The dubious ethics and morally grey Zuko tags start becoming relevant in this chapter. Also this chapter is more violent than the two previous chapters. Thank you all for reading!

Katara fiddles with her pendant necklace as her mother's attendant styles her hair in a braided updo with a pearl comb. 

The attendant bows and quietly leaves the room as Kya approaches Katara, pursing her lips as she helps the waterbender put on her jewelry. 

“I honestly expected something like this from your brother but not you! Why would you ever turn against him?” Kya exclaims, coldly. 

“Mom, I-” Katara begins. 

“No, Katara! You could have ruined everything,” as she touches Katara's cheek. “Thank the gods that your father is kind, that he loves you. He allowed me to come here, to help you. I know that I will leave early tomorrow morning but at least I am here. No other chief would have allowed this, your father has shown you mercy. I believe that what you have lost can be regained.”

Feeling her heart catch, Katara stammers, “What do you mean?”

With sharp eyes, Kya says, “Do your duty as a wife. It is the full moon tonight, your yin will match your husband's yang. Pray the gods give you a waterbending son. It does not matter if your son looks like your husband's people as long as he bends. A son with your blood and strength would be a marvel. Yue and Hahn have been married for years with no son, the court whispers that Tui has stopped favoring her. You can still rule before your brother comes of age then maybe your father would give you Ba Sing Se.” 

Katara takes soft breaths as her mother continues, “Do you wish to live the rest of your life smelling of dirt and your children never knowing the feel of snow under their feet?”

The waterbender's face tightens, “He will not wish to come with me, I know it.” 

Kya cups Katara's cheek, “Then leave him after you have your son.” As she pushes stray hairs back into Katara's updo, she whispers, “You would not be the first woman to have more than one husband. It is fine, no one will shame you.”

Katara pulls away for her mother and her hands grab onto the arm of her chair. “Is that what you told yourself after Dad died? That no one would look at you differently for taking another chief as your husband?”

Kya's lips draw thin, “How dare you! You are my daughter, my only daughter. I just believe you were born for greater things than this.”

“Were you always like this? Or did you change?” Katara remarks. 

Kya lets out a sharp breath and as she leaves the room, replies, “No, I think you are the one who is changing.”

* * *

Under the white wedding canopy, Katara and Cheng bow towards the rising moon. 

The sage prays in the old tongue as he places a small cut on their wrists before binding them together. 

She looks at Cheng, bright-eyed and smiling, as she says her vows in the old tongue. 

They share a soft and brief kiss under the glow of the lantern light in front of a small crowd made up of her mother, Aang, Yura, Kwa Mai, and Tai. 

And with his soft lips against hers, Katara forgets her mother, Arnook, the war, and her past.

Cheng is all there is. 

* * *

In their bedroom, Cheng tangles his hand in her hair as he whispers, “Close your eyes.”

She obeys and feels his soft breath against her face before he brushes his lips against hers. 

Their lips keep brushing as she pulls him closer, running her tongue along his bottom lip to beg for entrance. 

He complies and their tongues brush against each other before he breaks the kiss to trail kisses along her jaw and neck. 

She lets out a soft gasp and pulls him closer to her. They continue kissing and touching as he removes her robe. 

Flushing due to the alcohol and her shyness, Katara pulls away from him and he touches her wrist. At her ear, he rasps, “You are beautiful, don't hide yourself from me.”

Her flush deepens as she presses a kiss against his neck, allowing him to run his slightly-calloused hands up and down her body.

“No one else has ever seen you this way?” Cheng asks as he presses a kiss just below her ear.

Katara has lived, travelled, and fought with men but no one has ever seen her this intimately. Nor has she ever wanted anyone to. For so long, she had been so focused on the war and the new world that she never found time for relationships or deeper connections than casual friendships. She also never truly imagined having a home or family with someone. But she wants all those things with Cheng. The waterbender thinks back to the child in her dreams and looks up into his sharp eyes. In them she finds lust mixed with something that she cannot describe, she hopes it is genuine affection. Katara admits, “I've never really wanted anyone before...but I-I want you. I only want you.”

He presses a kiss to her cheek and rolls her under him before he finishes undressing. He then presses his lips forcefully against hers and their kiss grows in passion as he begins rocking against her. He then pushes her to lay on the furs as he licks, sucks, and kisses his way down her warmed flesh. 

Trembling, Katara grips his soft black hair and cries out as he laps at her center. 

He rises and captures her lips in a deep kiss as he positions himself against her. Katara lets out a gasp, feeling a slight pinch as he enters her. Her husband breathes against her ear as he thrusts in and out of her; the waterbender matches his pace and wraps her legs around his waist, crying out as she tightens around him, reaching completion. The prince follows her soon after, spilling himself inside her before slumping against her heated body. They are both shivering and slick with sweat when he rolls off of her, covering his eyes with his arm as he calms. 

Turning towards her, he rasps, “Are you okay?”

Katara nods as she runs a hand through his damp hair. The waterbender blushes as she watches his pale form move to pull up their wedding furs around them. With a satisfied sigh, Cheng turns on his side and she moves closer to press up against his back. 

Katara bites her lip as she listens to his breathing steady, waiting until she is sure he is asleep. 

Once she is sure, Katara whispers, “I love you,” into the soft darkness. 

* * *

In the morning, she covers her face with her hands as Yura takes the soiled bed sheets, pinching her cheek as she leaves. 

In the soft glow of sunlight, they enjoy seaweed noodles and warm tea. 

Cheng blushes softly as she stares at him from across the table. 

“What's wrong?” he asks with a slight pinch in his brow. 

“Nothing,” Katara quickly replies as she takes another sip. “I just...I can't believe this is real.”

He sets his cup down on the table and softly replies, “Me either.”

* * *

“Do you wish your family could be here?” Katara asks as she combs through his dark hair. 

“They couldn't have been here. Why bother thinking about it?” Her husband rasps as he sits between her legs but there is no anger in his statement, just acceptance. 

There is a long pause before Katara hesitantly asks, “Are they angry with you?” 

“Some of them are,” Cheng replies. 

Katara finishes combing through his hair and presses a kiss into it. “I'm sorry.”

“Why?” The prince asks as he turns his head over his shoulder to look into her eyes.

Why? Why is she sorry? Because no matter what she gives him it will never match the things he has lost. 

“I just am,” she whispers. 

* * *

With Cheng, at times it feels like their igloo is the entire world. It is warmed not just by the fire but by the joy and love in her heart when he is near her. 

At night, they braid each other's hair as they share tales about the spirits, the sea, and the stars. 

They often have Aang over to play card games or pai sho. One night they even played music because Aang begged Katara to sing. 

By candlelight, they read scrolls on ancient history, a history long before there were four nations. 

After they make love, she tells him of her father, her life in the North, and the things she fears will never leave her. 

Cheng tells her about the air nomads that he's watched break their vows to take up arms, the fatherless children shamed for their blue eyes, and men so old they remembered what peace smelled like. 

Katara listens to his stories but they do not sway her to believe that her path is wrong, that the gods are not at her side, or that the new age will not soon come. Katara thinks that if the spirits were against her then they would have never sent him to her. 

The waterbender runs a finger down his arm, tracing a vein as she speaks of the future she hopes for, the future she wishes for them.

As he sleeps, she presses a kiss to his chest just above his beating heart and prays to her gods that one day he might understand her...perhaps even love her. 

* * *

They walk through the crowded market, purchasing items for a vegetarian dinner with Aang. 

Cheng's eyes narrow and he places his hand against her wrist. “What is happening there?” Directing his gaze at a crowd of people around Governor Silla and five chained teenagers with tear-streaked cheeks clad in simple faded parkas. 

She takes his hand in hers because she knows what will happen. “Come on, let's go home,” she orders. 

He peers down at her, “Tell me what they are doing.”

The waterbender firmly says, “I will tell you but at home.”

Cheng looks back at the scene before following her out of the city. 

After their dinner with Aang, she sits and places her hair into a loose braid. She stiffens then relaxes when she feels Cheng place his hand at her nape. She tilts her head to look up at him, blue meeting green. 

“You said you would tell me so tell me.”

So she grabs his large hand and sits him down across from her. He listens intently as she tells him of the old beliefs and those who still follow them. Of rebellions against the North and entire clans banished out past a large forest. Of families migrating camps between winter and summer. Of how no one in the city is allowed to help them or would even try to if they were allowed to do so. 

“But what does that have to do with those boys?” he queries with a tight jaw. 

So she tells him of how without a true support of a community, many of those outsiders are reduced to theft. Explaining that one of the gravest crimes one can commit in the tribe is theft. Katara speaks of lashes and corded whips, and how those punishments are doubled for former rebels and old believers.

A vein in Cheng's neck bulges but he says nothing, rising to get ready for bed. 

* * *

The next day, the drowsy golden sunlight flows through her window and Katara reaches for Cheng in their bed. She raises her head when she doesn't find him, she gets up and exits their bedroom, hoping to find him in the main area. He is not there. She begins to grow frantic and dresses quickly, running outside to look for him. 

He is not there. 

Her heart drops to the pit of her stomach because she knows exactly where he is and what he went to do. 

Katara quickly bends a sled and races towards the city, her hair flowing behind her. 

* * *

“No, please! Don’t!” Katara pleads as she holds onto Cheng's arm. 

“They are boys, Katara. They don't deserve this.” Cheng states plainly as two guards stand beside them. 

She pushes her hair out of her face to look up at him. “Our people consider them men.”

“You would see them whipped for stealing?” he asks as they remove his parka, exposing his pale skin. 

“No-I-please, it doesn’t have to be you.” she whimpers. 

“Then who will do it?” 

“No! I’m begging you. You have to listen to me,” Katara pleads as tears begin pooling in her eyes. 

“Why?” he asks and the way he says it almost breaks her heart. 

She desperately wishes to say: _Because I love you._

But fear catches her heart so she declares, “Because you belong to me.”

He lets out a breath and with a soft gaze, he says, “People don’t belong to people, Katara. We only belong to ourselves.” 

The waterbender thinks, _Even if you don’t belong to me, I belong to you._

“You can't take the punishment of five men. You are going to die,” she states, truly believing it. 

As the guards place shackles around his wrists and he looks at her as he has never looked at her before, and she feels that he is showing her a part of himself that she has never seen before. “I won’t. I know exactly where I’m going to die and it is not here.”

Governor Silla stands before the crowd of people gathered at the edge of the city to watch the punishment. “Today we were meant to punish five criminals, outsiders to our community. Thieves and vagrants, stains on our great tribe. But instead we will see one man, a son of earth, take their punishment. He asked to do this and may the gods show him mercy.”

Yura stands next to her in the crowd of people gathered at the edge of the city to watch the punishment. Katara grips Yura's arm forcefully as she struggles to stay upright. 

She will never forget the sound of the whip hitting his back and the screams he lets out. That will stay with her for the rest of her life. 

Katara becomes dizzy as she watches his back become covered in blood, his skin being ripped away by the whip. 

After the crowd dissipates, Katara vomits in the snow, kneeling as she takes shaky, shallow breaths. 

Governor Silla takes leisure steps and kneels down in front of her. “Oh, clanless one, if your father could see you now, crying over a son of earth. He is just one prince, that land has hundreds. You could find another.”

With hard eyes, she looks up at him. “You are a monster.”

“No, Katara, I am a teacher. If there are no punishments in society how will people learn? Tui and La gave our people the great burden of guiding this world, how can we do such a thing if we can't even guide ourselves?” With icy eyes, he barks, “Now, go! While his heart still beats.”

* * *

Two guards help her place Cheng on a sled to take him back to their igloo. He is pale, paler than he has ever been and his pulse is weak but he is awake, softly whimpering as she touches his hair. 

Inside their igloo, Katara readies herself to begin healing him. 

Katara inspects his injury, confirming that it will take several healing sessions for her to deal with. She lets out a breath and wipes her tears before she clears her mind of everything, all the pain and anger, in order to focus on her task. 

Katara opens her water skin and eases the water around her hands before placing it against his wounds. He gasps at the connection and she feels a warmth spreading through her body and realizes that it is his chi brushing against hers. His chi is warm and strong, just as he is. 

She continues pressing her palms against his damaged skin and by the time she is done with the first session, she is exhausted and he has fallen asleep. 

Katara removes her blood-stained clothes then goes to their basin to bathe. 

She puts on a clean robe and pulls back her hair as she hears a knock on the door. Katara opens it to see the Kyoshi Warrior guards, Kwa Mai and Tai, make-up free.

 _They both have beautiful doll-life faces_ , she thinks. A tinge of jealousy comes into her heart as she wonders how long they have known Cheng but now is not the time to ask such things. 

Katara closes the door gently and speaks to them outside. The two women are bundled up in dark cloaks and holding bags of food as the crisp wind blows against them. 

“What kind of guards are you two? You’ve never protected him, not once!” Katara's jaw juts forward as she yells at them, wiping tears from her eyes. 

The two women are silent, taking a moment to look at her until Kwa Mai murmurs, “He has his own mind, always has.”

Katara ushers them inside and they place the bags down. “Look, you can sleep in the main room. We can watch Cheng in shifts. Is that okay with you both?”

* * *

Cheng's screams in her mind and the smell of his blood is at the tip of her nose as she twists in bed. 

It is Kwa Mai's shift but Katara rises to check up on Cheng and to see if the warrior would like to rest. 

Cheng whimpers and softly cries out, “Grandfather, Auntie please wake up! Please don’t leave me alone! I’m scared, I want to go home. Please wake up so we can all go home. Don’t leave me.”

Katara approaches the main room and hears Kwa Mai whisper, “Hush, you are safe. Just rest.” 

Softly, Cheng chokes out, “Darling? You are here with me?”

Breathless, Katara feels something sharp digging into her heart and as she approaches Cheng's cot and Kwa Mai sitting next to him. When the warrior looks over at her, Katara's eyes are brimmed with tears.

* * *

Katara hands the woman a cup of tea as they whisper to each other. 

Katara pushes a curl behind her ear. “How did you meet him, I thought you were from Kyoshi?” 

“I met him because my family would move back and forth between Kyoshi and Omashu, depending on the political situation. Your tribe’s war has made nomads out of many of us,” Kwa Mai coolly answers. 

Tactlessly, Katara sets down her cup. “You used to be his lover. I think he still loves you.” 

Kwa Mai lets out a sigh and brings the cup to her lips. “No, he doesn’t.” 

Katara leans back and scoffs, searching the woman's eyes. “Really? Well, he doesn’t love me so it must be you he loves.” 

“That’s not how it works at all,” the warrior states with a controlled expression. 

“Then tell me how it works!” 

With a sigh and a firm gaze, Kwa Mai admits, “He loves his people more than anything. He would choose them over everything and anyone. He is here for them, to protect them. Do you get it now?” 

The waterbender nods in understanding and takes another sip of her tea. Quietly, she murmurs, “Then why are you here? It sounds like he ended it, I mean.” 

“You don’t just suddenly stop caring about someone,” Kwa Mai bites her lip and adds, “I don’t think you ever truly can.” 

* * *

The next morning, a man that she has never seen before appears at her door. 

The three women stand in the doorway as a man with time-ravished skin bows before them. 

“Hello, princess. My name is Thod. I am an old believer. Our people heard of your husband's great deed. I am here to pray over him and bless him.”

Looking back in the igloo at Cheng, Katara pushes down the prejudices in her heart and ushers the man inside. 

As the shaman says the old prayers, Cheng groans and opens his cloudy eyes, tilting his head towards the unfamiliar man. 

The prince's face contorts in anger as he growls, “Stop praying over me! I do not serve your gods, I have my own.”

“Hush, my beloved, just rest. Please just rest,” Katara coos as she rubs cool water at his temple to calm him.

“I want to go home,” he sobs. 

“Soon, dear heart. We’ll go to your home and I’ll live there with you. I’ll do anything you wish, I promise,” Katara murmurs as she presses a kiss to his brow. 

* * *

“What happened to your family, Cheng? You were crying out for them in your sleep.”

“What do you think happened to them, Katara?”

* * *

By the end of the week, he is walking normally, he is still somewhat tired but he is in much better spirits. 

Katara takes his soft hair in her hands to braid it. Softly, she says, “My grandfather was a very religious man, he would go out into the battlefield and take off the helmets of Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom soldiers to look into their eyes. He said that with one look he could tell what kind of person they were, whether they were worthy of living in our new world. Those he believed to be worthy he allowed them to live. I looked into the eyes of all those people who watched you get beaten and saw that not one of them deserves to live in the new world. Silla is a monster, I would cut his throat if I could. My nation, like all nations in this world, needs a cleansing.” 

When he turns his head to look back at her, his eyes are dark and he is searching for something. Slowly, he asks, “Am I worthy of living in your new world?” 

She thinks back to his bravery, his strength, and his near boundless compassion-the new world is for him, she needs him there with her. Just to see how he would react, Katara tilts her head and answers, “I am not sure yet.” 

With a slight smirk, he suggests, “Maybe it is not my worthiness you are unsure of but your own.” 

* * *

It is a perfect black night as Katara presses kisses to his lips, nose, cheeks, eyelids, and forehead. 

“Oh, Katara,” Cheng breathes as his eyes flutter open. 

The prince looks at her with a blank expression.

She traces his soft lips as she murmurs, “I know you don't love me but I love you. I would do anything to make you happy.”

Katara watches as something shifts in his eyes and Cheng pulls her against him. “You healed me, that means more to me than you'll ever know,” he whispers before pressing a kiss into her hair. 

* * *

Katara pours tea for Yura as they eat kale cookies at their table. 

“Dear one, tomorrow is the Glacier Spirits Festival. You are clanless and your husband is an outsider but I convinced Governor Silla to allow you both to attend the feast in the great hall with all the other high nobles. It is the last major event before you leave for Omashu, I wish for your last memories of the tribe to be good.”

With a bright smile, Katara reaches to clutch Yura's hand. “Oh thank you, Yura. I very much appreciate it.”

Yura turns towards Cheng, “You will enjoy it very much I hope. I am sorry for the suffering you have experienced here.”

Cheng gives her a slight smile, “I am alright now, ma'am. As they say, all things pass.”

* * *

She holds Cheng's warm hand in hers as they watch the performers in the great hall. 

Katara leans in towards her husband and is about to speak when suddenly a large group of armed Water Tribe men enter the hall, killing and disarming the guards. 

Governor Silla stands on the dais and begins shouting orders as his guards attempt to fight off the intruders. 

Screams begin to erupt in the hall as people run for cover or attempt to exit the building. The metallic scent of blood hits Katara's nose as she searches for Cheng but she does not see him through the crowd. She shouts his name and runs through the fray as bodies fall all around her, the ice floor covered in blood. 

Katara looks above her and sees Cheng rushing onto the dais. She begins to fight her way towards him and she gets close to him, continuing to shout his name. 

Then, it happens.

_Is this a dream?_

Katara takes short breaths as everything spins around her. Cheng runs a katana through Governor Silla's guards, blood flowing from them as he pushes past them towards Governor Silla. Once he reaches Silla, he whispers to him as he pushes his sword into his side, holding it as the life fades from Silla's eyes.

_This is a dream._

The shouts around her continue but she cannot move. She can barely breathe. Cheng looks down from the dais and sees her, jumping down to walk towards her. The prince reaches her and she stares at the blood across his cheeks, lips, and in his hair. 

She trembles as he pulls her to him and cannot even find the strength to try to push him away. Her breathing grows shaky as he presses her against him, his hand smoothing her hair.

So softly, that she wasn't even sure he could hear her, she whispers, “What is this?”

With pride in his eyes, as people continue to scream and cry out around them, he declares, “Katara, this is the first day of the new world.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh!!!! Thank you all so so much for the comments, kudos, and hits. You all had some really great questions and thoughts. Also to provide some context the next chapter will be an interlude from Zuko’s perspective (!!!)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter really took on a life of its own. Initially, it was supposed to be Zuko, Mai, and Ty Lee scheming in the SWT but it turned into a story of Zuko's entire life. I hope you all enjoy!

_The Dragon Prince’s Interlude_

Eight-year-old Prince Zuko looks out the carriage window marveling at the strips of sunlight shining through the rippling of white in the ever-blue sky. 

The carriage rocks slightly, causing the little boy to bump into his aunt. 

With wide eyes, he says, “I'm sorry, Auntie Lian. I didn't mean to hurt the baby.”

His aunt gives him a tender smile and wraps an arm around him. “It is alright, little spark. I am fine.”

Across from them in the carriage, Fire Lord Azulon places his newspaper down in his lap, his crown glittering in the sunlight. “Do not worry, dear boy. Your little cousin is a dragon, a little bump shall do them no harm.”

The carriage stops and Lian holds Zuko’s hand as their retinue walks up the mountain road to a small temple. 

A grey-eyed sage greets them, handing spiced tea to the royals and their retinue. When the sage hands Zuko his cup, the young boy looks into the man’s eyes. The sage’s eyes are grey which is somewhat rare in the Fire Nation but it is the lack of warmth in them that truly draws the boy’s attention. He is distant in a way most sages are not. 

The young prince continues to look back at the sage even as his aunt leads him towards the sanctuary. Zuko swirls his tea as he watches everyone else drink their cups. His brow furrows slightly, the liquid looks lighter than usual and the smell, it is not as strong. He is not sure why but he sets his cup down on a bench. 

The three royals leave their retinue behind as they enter the holiest chambers of the temple, beginning to whisper the ancient prayers. Zuko prays for Azula and Lu Ten to get over their colds so they can all play together, for his uncle to win his battle in the Western front, and for his parents' safe return from Yu Dao. 

He continues praying for a dragon kite for his birthday and maybe his own hawk when he hears a scream from his aunt as she falls to the floor, clutching her stomach and crying out. 

His grandfather kneels at Lian’s side and shouts, “Guards! We must return to the palace, to a healer! The princess needs help, the baby-”

Zuko watches as his grandfather crumples to the floor, vomiting as blood runs down his nose. He runs to his family’s side, touching their clammy skin as they shake.

He hears the sounds of other people crying out in pain and the smell of vomit and blood. From outside the door he hears, “Assassins! Assassins in our midst! Secure the royal family!”

Zuko presses a palm to his grandfather’s forehead, he is cold...much too cold for a firebender. His grandfather is dying and there is nothing he can do to save him. “Grandfather, Auntie! Please get up! You both have to get up. I'm scared. I want to go home.”

Azulon takes shallow breaths as he looks into his grandson’s eyes. “Zuko...run...you hear me...run.” 

"But I have to get help for you and Auntie!"

He looks over at his aunt, she has stopped moving completely, he crawls over and presses her hand to his face. It is cold, she is gone. 

“Run...Zuko! The...hidden...passage, the one I showed you...please...run...run…” Azulon whispers as his voice trails off. 

Zuko, his vision blurry with tears, opens the door to the hidden passageway and runs out of the temple into the open air. 

“The boy lives! We must capture the boy!”

The assassins chase him through the trees, no matter how many times he stumbles or falls, he keeps running. He’ll never stop running. 

They chase him to a cliff and the boy looks down into the raging ocean. 

“Boy, stop! You have nowhere to go. We have you surrounded.”

Zuko looks at the grey and blue-eyed assassins dressed in sages' robes then down towards the churning of the bright waves against the cliffs. 

The young prince closes his eyes, hearing his father’s voice. 

_Dragons never surrender._

He also hears the voice of his uncle, from last summer on Ember Island. They were standing on a balcony, staring at the large waves hitting the shore when Uncle placed a warm hand on Zuko’s shoulder. 

_The sea is in us just as much as the flame. It will never harm us, only guide us._

The prince holds his breath and jumps.

* * *

He cannot see anything, he only feels a deep warmth pouring over him, consuming him like a fire. 

_Am I dead?_

And a voice answers, a voice that is all things: young and old, soft and loud, warm and cool. _No, you are not dead, young prince._

_Who are you?_

_You know me. You've always known me. Since you've been born I've been in you, guiding you._

_Agni?_

_Yes, my dear son. I am Agni._

_But...how?_

_There is much life left in you. Your life will not end here. If you wish to see where you will die, I will show you._

He closes his eyes as pure energy rushes through him. 

Suddenly, he is on Ember Island, the window is open and the sea breeze hits his face. He is himself but he is also not. He is old, he is strong but his body is wrinkled by age and time. He is passing, leaving this world. He has no fear or regret in his heart, only love and peace. He is being held in someone's arms, he does not know them but he knows they are a woman and they love him, their love for him is as sure as the rising sun. The room smells of rosewater and the sea and something that belongs to the woman alone. She runs a gentle hand through his white hair and whispers, “My beloved, you can leave me now. I love you and I will find you again; we will live our next life together. Remember I once told you that not even the stars could keep us apart. In our next life maybe we will begin as friends.”

_Take comfort, child. You will help make this world anew._

* * *

He feels something licking at him, well several things licking at him. 

The prince's eyes flutter open and he screams. 

Dragons. Three little dragons staring at him with bright golden eyes. Eyes that seem to match his own. 

He blinks several times, even slapping himself, attempting to wake up from this strange vision. 

Dragons don't interact with humans. At least not anymore. Before the war, there were at least twenty people a generation who dragons felt had the strength of heart necessary to ride them. When the war began, their people eagerly awaited for the next generation of dragon-riders to emerge. None ever did, the dragons stayed away from human-kind, no longer finding them worthy of their presence or aid. 

Over the years, an entire order of sages developed to mourn and seek Agni's favor, to plead with him to allow their people to ride dragons as they once did. Nothing ever changed, his two-great grandfathers were the last of the dragon riders. 

Yet here are three small dragons in front of him, staring at him, allowing him to be in their presence. 

* * *

He sits, staring at the dragons as they nuzzle and press against his ruined and teared clothes. They all seem especially interested in his pointed shoes.

_[Our Mama bring food.]_

“What?”

_[Mama bring food. Mama bring you from sea. You are cousin.]_

_What in Agni’s name is going on?_ Not only are the dragons somehow communicating with him without speaking, they are claiming he's a relative of theirs. 

Zuko remembers Agni telling him that he wasn't dead, that he had much life left to live but this feels like his mind imagining things as he drifts into the spirit world.

Firmly, he replies, “No, I’m definitely not. I think someone would have told me if my cousins were dragons. I have two cousins...one cousin.”

Zuko thinks back to his aunt Lian and the baby that was growing inside her. The little cousin he'll never get to meet them. His aunt and grandfather, he can still smell the blood and vomit. He begins shivering as he pictures their cold bodies on the marble floor. They are dead and he is lost, far from home. He’ll never see his family or home again. He’ll never again eat fire flakes, swim at the beach, or hear his mother tell spirit tales. He'll die here, alone save for the dragons. The young prince throws his head in his hands and sobs as the dragons circle around him. 

_[No cry, cousin. No sad.]_

“I’m not your cousin!” he shouts. 

Then, he feels a strong wind come in from behind him, nearly causing him to fall over. He turns his head and gasps as the large blue dragon lands on the island. 

The little dragons begin jumping and burping small flames. 

_[Mama! Mama! Mama!]_

The majestic blue dragon looks down at the little dragons then turns her sharp golden eyes at Zuko. 

He stops breathing as their eyes meet. 

_[Hello, Zuko. Little prince of fire. I am Hathai.]_

The prince wets his dry and cracked lips. “How do you know my name?” 

_[You are kin of my kin, blood of my blood. You are a son of Ko.]_

“What?”

_[Do you know the story of the first fire sage?]_

Zuko remembers his lessons on Fire Nation royal history at the Royal Academy for Boys. He would shrink under the glares of his classmates as their instructor discussed the ancient origins of the royal line. 

The prince brushes his tangled hair out of his face and echoes what he was taught. “Yes, the first fire sage was named Zuko, he was the son of the dragon Ko and his mortal wife, Aoi.”

_[Are you not descended from Zuko? Are you not his namesake?]_

“Yes.”

_[Now you see? We are kin. You have dragon’s blood in you. More than any human in an age.]_

“I want to go home,” he whispers, confused and tired. 

The dragon looks at him with something he could describe as sympathy. 

_[Princeling, you must regain your strength and there is much you must learn from me.]_

* * *

Time does not exist on the island for him. The sun rises and sets but he cannot truly measure it. He once attempted to keep track of his time there but he could not do it, his mind would not focus on it. 

All his mind and body seemed to want to do was bend. 

So he does. 

As the time passes and he learns more from Hathai, he is able to change his flame, to mix flicks of red, green, and purple into the gold. 

One day, he wakes to Hathai licking him. 

_[Dear prince, it is time for me to take you home.]_

* * *

A breathlessness comes over him as they fly to Caldera.

Zuko feels completely at peace, as if he was born to fly above the clouds. In his heart, he feels that he was always destined for this. 

When they reach Caldera, the entire city is enveloped in mourning white. 

He directs Hathai to land behind the palace, the dragon flying off towards the island as the royal guards approach Zuko. 

“A dragon! The boy flew in on a dragon!”

A brave and young guard takes measured steps towards Zuko. 

“Who are you?”

“I'm Prince Zuko.”

“Prince Zuko has been missing for six months. They fear him dead.”

 _Six months? He has been gone that long?_ He missed his birthday, the summer solstice, and a couple of the major feast days. 

Zuko attempts to steady his breathing and fidgets with his tattered robe. “No, I'm Prince Zuko and I'm alive.”

* * *

He sits in a room with two guards and a sage as a great commotion goes on on the other side of the door. 

“Your majesty, please do not come in! I will handle the interrogation of the boy. The royal house has seen enough pretenders.”

Immediately, he hears the booming voice of his uncle, all fire and brimstone. “I will see him! They say he came on a dragon, I must speak to him.”

His uncle enters the room, wearing blood red robes with the gleaming flame in his topknot.

Jumping up, Zuko declares, “Uncle! Uncle, it is me! No one believes me!”

Iroh looks at him and with a brokenness in his voice, says, “You look like him, more than any other boy I've seen but please, where are your parents? How did you come in on a dragon? Tell me the truth, my family can take no more of this, no more lies.”

“Uncle, look at me. Look at my face and into my eyes. You know me. Remember what grandfather used to say, blood recognizes blood?" With tears in his eyes, he adds, “Have the sage touch my flame, please.”

Iroh nods and Zuko forms a small flame to hand to the sage. The sage touches the flame, “Your majesty, it is Prince Zuko. The flame has the strength of the royal bloodline in it. It has the intensity of Prince Ozai and the refinement of Princess Ursa.”

Trembling, Iroh cups Zuko's dirtied cheek before pulling the boy up into his arms, weeping. 

“Oh spirits, how we've missed you. I felt as though my heart had turned to ash. My phoenix and our baby, Father, and then you...I wanted to turn the tribes into a wasteland.”

Zuko clutches tightly to his uncle as hot tears run down his cheeks. The boy does not reply but in his heart he wishes for them to do just that. 

* * *

The servants bathe him and wash his hair with rosewater, combing through the many tangles and trimming the split ends. When they clip his nails, the prince holds in the desire to growl at them. 

After he is dressed and fed, Iroh takes him to the family apartments. 

Before Iroh opens the grand doors, Zuko freezes. 

“Don't worry, we are your family. All will be well,” Iroh says gently. 

Zuko enters to find his mother and sister sitting on a couch, his cousin pacing the room, and his father looking out the window at where Hathai once stood. 

Ursa raises her head, her eyelashes darkened by tears. His mother looks tired with half-circles under her eyes and a sadness in them that he has never seen before. 

She approaches, little by little, moving to touch him as if he were made of glass. 

With wide golden eyes, he looks up at her, “Mom, it's me.”

The princess wraps her arms around him, “My love, I knew you would come back. I just knew it. I prayed every day for it.” 

Iroh, Lu Ten, and even Azula join the hug but Ozai remains where he stands, contemplating Zuko's presence. 

* * *

In the hushed darkness of his bedroom, Zuko awakens to Ozai sitting at the foot of his bed, a gaze so intense that Zuko feels his father might be peering into his very soul. 

“Show me what they taught you.” 

On the palace training grounds, Zuko goes through the many forms that Hathai taught him, finishing off by intermixing the various colors. 

Ozai brings the boy into his arms and Zuko stiffens, not used to open affection from his father. With shining eyes, Ozai exclaims, “Your eyes, they glow like the very fire of the eternal flame. My son, from death you arose greater than you once were.” 

* * *

The whispers in court say that Prince Zuko is dead but a dragon took pity on the royal family, taking on the prince's form to comfort them. Anger builds steadily inside Zuko and he wishes to call out all the gossipers, ask them why they are not contributing to the war effort instead of talking about a child. Ozai assures him that the rumors are good, let the people grow his legend without him even lifting a finger. 

On the day he demonstrates his new abilities in front of Iroh and the high sages, most of the high nobles are there to watch. 

In the temple, the sages ask Zuko questions about Agni, Hathai, and the island.

They copy his movements into new scrolls, to add alongside the classic styles. 

After he leaves the temple, Azula corners him. “If you are done being worshipped, Mai and Ty Lee would like you to play hide and seek with us.” 

So Zuko runs off with them, content to finally be a child again. 

* * *

Zuko is fourteen when he looks up towards the sky and sees Hathai flying over Caldera with one of her children.

Zuko bows to Hathai as the dragon presents her son. 

_[Prince of Fire, say my son's name. You know it.]_

Without even thinking, a sense of recognition comes over Zuko, and he whispers a name that some deep part of him has always known. 

“Druk.” 

With the sun at his back, the prince asks, “What do I do now?” 

_[Ride him.]_

* * *

Zuko is sixteen when the Dragon Prince is truly born. 

They are fighting with their allies in Fuhuong, attempting to hold back the tribes as the wind and rain rushes at them. 

Suddenly, lightning begins flashing across the sky and Zuko's eyes take on an intense glow when he and Azula share a look.

Through the rain, Lu Ten shouts, “Little cousin, are you mad! You'll die!”

Zuko shakes his head before jumping on Druk, riding through the heavy rain up towards the clouds. 

The prince stands on Druk, as lightning falls around them but he has no fear. Lightning is a part of him just as fire. He channels the cold fire through himself before redirecting it towards their enemies, scattering them in his wake. 

When he and Druk land back on the ground, the drenched Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom troops have their eyes fixed on him, wonderstruck.

Lu Ten lets out a bark of laughter then quiets, “Who are you?” 

Zuko pauses, then honestly answers, “I don't know.” 

* * *

In the shadows they lie in wait with anticipation. A pirate ship is docking in a Fire Nation protected area, an act encouraged by the tribes to keep segments of the Fire Navy distracted from the war effort. 

Mai's eyes meet his and Zuko thanks Agni that his blush is hidden under the cover of night. 

They leap forward onto the ship as shouts ring out among the pirates. The fray is illuminated by the moon above them and the bursts of Zuko's flames. 

Mai's sharp blades cut through throats while Zuko's flaming swords cut through armor, piercing the sides of their foes. 

The pair returns back towards the shore and sinks into the sand after defeating their opponents. 

Zuko turns towards Mai, wiping the blood off her cheek before pulling her in for a kiss. 

After they separate, Mai gives him a wry smile and says, “Same time next week?”

* * *

Toph opens the metal bars of the prison cell to expose a crumpled and beaten young woman, her auburn hair caked with blood as she slumps against the dirtied wall. 

The young woman looks up at them through swollen blue eyes, “Who are you people?”

Zuko turns to Toph, Mai, and Ty Lee then back at the woman, “Friends. I mean, we could be friends.”

The woman blinks several times, unsure if they are truly in front of her. 

Mai shifts her weight and sighs, “Do you want to get out of here or not? We are kind of on a time crunch.”

Later, on the air ship towards an Earth Kingdom base, the young woman in the infirmary huddles under a mountain of blankets, drinking jasmine tea. 

Zuko and Toph are lounging around the room, taking in the weighted silence. 

Through cracked lips, the warrior hoarsely whispers, “How did you people know about me and where to find me?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, Zuko replies, “Suki, uh, we all heard about what you tried to do in Kyoshi. Sorry that your rebellion got, uh...”

“Crushed,” Suki offers as she pulls the blankets more tightly around herself. 

Zuko bites his lip and says, “Well that wasn't the word that I wanted to use but yeah, crushed.”

Suki lets out a sigh, “We were so close, freedom was so close I could taste it but then Sokka and Katara showed up.”

Zuko's eyebrow raises slightly as a smile forms on his face, “Wait? You know them, personally?”

The warrior runs a hand through her matted hair, “They would come to the island a lot when we were kids. I guess you could say the three of us used to be friends...I mean, until the war became important to them and our lives just diverged.”

Toph blows her bangs out of her face, “For Yangchen's sake, not this shit again!”

Suki furrows her brow, “Why? What's wrong?”

Toph lets out a tired breath, “Nothing, just that Prince Pouty and his family are obsessed with besting them.”

“Prince Pouty?” The warrior exclaims before turning to Zuko, “You are a prince?”

Toph slaps Zuko's back, “Not just a prince, _the_ prince. The freaking Dragon Prince.”

Suki's eyes widen slightly as she takes Zuko in. “Oh, shit.”

A lazy grin appears on Toph's face, “You could say that again.”

* * *

Zuko or _Hee_ adjusts their _qitou_ and smooths down their emerald green dress. The prince slowly blends the poisoned tea before carrying the tea set into an elaborately decorated room. 

In the room sits an old General Binoq, the butcher of Muon Geng and the general who ordered the assassination of the royal family, the one that Zuko narrowly escaped. 

The old general narrows his stormy blue eyes at the well-dressed woman. “Who are you? Where is Li Hua?”

Zuko clears his throat, “My name is Hee. Li Hua is ill, with the fever. The madam sent me to serve you because you like pale girls and I'm the palest girl here.”

A smile appears on the old man's face as his eyes darken in lust, “Yes, yes, you are.”

“Would you like me to pour you some tea?” 

“Yes, sweet girl but you drink your tea first.” The general orders. 

Zuko pours the tea then takes his seat across from the general. The firebender smiles, white teeth cutting through red-tinted lips. “Of course, great general. I will do as you wish.” He brings the cup to his lips, feeling the liquid go down his throat.

Binoq watches and waits for several minutes before he lifts his cup to his mouth and drinks the tea. He is about to speak when he begins choking and wheezing as blood trickles out of his nose. 

The old man falls over, shaking as Zuko rises to stand over him. 

“Do you feel the life leaving your body? This is the same prickle-snake extract that you used to kill my pregnant aunt and grandfather along with our retinue.”

Binoq's eyes widen as he struggles to breath, “A...boy? You...were...the...boy...that...jumped! But...how? You...drank...too...you...should...be...dead...”

Zuko kneels down and roughly grabs the old general's hair, forcing him to look into his eyes as he dies. “My name is Zuko, I am the Dragon Prince. I've been ingesting small doses of this poison for years, building immunity to it. Now I am immune to a great many poisons. Now die, may you be damned to Koh's lair for all eternity.”

Zuko gives the man's body a hard kick before fleeing the teahouse as a group of water tribe guards run past him. He turns a corner and enters into a light green carriage. 

He takes deep breaths and looks over at Toph sitting across from him. The prince turns around and opens the small window to speak to the driver. He growls, “If either of you breathe an Agni-damned word about this unauthorized mission to anyone, I'll-.”

Toph raises her eyebrows and lets out a laugh. “Hey! I can't even see what you look like _Hee_. For all I know, you aren't even wearing a dress and makeup!”

Jet turns back towards the prince with mirth in his brown eyes. “I was just going to say that you look absolutely stunning, Miss _Hee_. Too bad a poor country boy like myself has no money to properly court you. I'm sure our daughters would be beautiful.”

“Just drive the fucking carriage, Jet." Zuko exclaims as he begins to wipe the makeup off his face. 

* * *

At a White Lotus meeting, a hush comes over everyone when Toph stands up. “Jet can’t do it.”

“Excuse me, Lady Beifong?” Grand Master Piandao says tentatively. 

Toph crosses her arms, “Look, Jet’s a commoner, okay. She’s a princess, she’ll notice that he isn't trained in the four arts. Let's all be honest here, Jet’s intense hatred of the tribes radiates off of him. This princess would know something was off immediately. She's the Blood Princess, she just killed the Grand Master! We can't take any chances with her. I think she would cut Jet's throat as soon as he stepped off the boat.”

“Who do you suggest?” Master Jeong-Jeong queries as he strokes his beard. 

Toph pushes her hair behind her ear and replies, “I don’t know, maybe the one prince we actually have in our group.”

Fire Lord Iroh looks at Zuko with nervousness in his eyes and turns his gaze at Toph. Hesitantly, he begins, “Prince Zuko? But-”

Master Piandao meets Zuko's eyes with an open gaze. “Prince Zuko, would you be willing to take up this mission?”

Zuko stands and firmly says, “I would.”

Master Piandao shares a look with Iroh before turning towards Zuko. “The order shall be indebted to you, Prince Cheng of Omashu.”

In the coolness of the night, Zuko sets down two crates in front of a door before he knocks twice on it. 

Toph opens the door in her night wear and lets him in, Zuko entering with two crates of expensive fire whiskey. 

Zuko pours a glass of fire whiskey for her and they clank their glasses. With a wide grin, Zuko says, “Thanks, Champ.”

Toph brings the glass to her lips and takes a sip before replying, “Don’t mention it. I owed you for that shit in Holin.”

* * *

Behind a bar in Yu Dao, Zuko holds his cloak around him as he waits. 

A hooded woman approaches him and with shining amber eyes, Azula asks, “So it worked?”

Zuko nods and a smile cuts across Azula's face. “Good, brother. I am proud of you. Father's plan is moving along just as he would like it to.”

The prince lets out a slow breath, “What if the order finds out?”

Azula cups Zuko's cheek to turn his face towards hers. “By the time they find out, it'll already be too late. No one will be able to trace anything back to you. We can paint it all as a series of unfortunate accidents, such things happen in war.”

With a slow nod, Zuko replies, “For the Fire Nation.”

“For the Fire Nation,” Azula repeats as the two siblings walk off in opposite directions. 

* * *

In a tavern at the edge of Harbor City, a prince plays the white lotus gambit and smiles in the face of a new friend. 

He bundles into a snowmobile with Mai and Ty Lee as they travel far past the forests in the backlands of the tribe. 

When they reach a settlement, they find a large group of men sitting around an intense fire under a crescent moon. 

Zuko removes his hood and looks around at the families and their simple sealskin tents. “I look for Gilak son of Tudek.”

A large and imposing man stands and approaches the trio. “Why? What could a stranger possibly need from here? Don’t you see how we live?”

The firebender narrows his sharp eyes at the warrior. “I was once told that wolves never forget. They remember every single moment of their lives but if you all have forgotten what was done to you, what continues to be done to you, I shall leave. I have no use for spiritless people.”

Zuko signals for Mai and Ty Lee to begin following him back towards their snowmobile.

The warrior shouts, “Wait! Who are you?”

“I am known by many names by many people but I am the Dragon Prince.” 

Mai rolls her eyes as gasps begin to ring out amongst the people. His legend is truly known throughout the world, even here at the bottom of the world. 

Zuko continues, “My true name is Zuko. Son of Princess Ursa and Prince Ozai, grandson of Fire Lord Azulon. I am of both Sozin's and Roku’s blood. Fire itself runs through me-it is what birthed me and what sustains me.”

“I am Gilak. Come closer.” The warrior says. 

Another man approaches and says, “Are you not the betrothed of the Blood Princess? Why should we trust you?”

The crowd begins whispering as they look at the three outsiders. 

With a snarl, Zuko states, “Would my blood ever side with hers after what was done to us by them? I shall be a mink snake in her bed waiting for my moment to strike.”

That comment seems to appease the crowd and they relax their postures. 

“What do you want from us?” Gilak asks. 

_What does he want from them?_

Zuko thinks back to Katara. The moment when she embraced him, cupping his cheek and telling him that she wished for him to rule the new world with her. How angry that made him, how he had to stop himself from breathing smoke and fire, from pushing her away, from exposing himself. He thinks of the tribe made rich by war but not even distributing that wealth evenly across the population. How the North brought in Northern governors, Northern councilmen, Northern judges, and Northern teachers to the South Pole while many true Southerners live as outsiders in their own land. How Katara let this happen and even helped this happen. 

The prince replies, “I want your spears and your hearts. I want to end the reign of Arnook and his ilk. I wish to see the South freed from Northern chiefs. I am willing to lend my aid to your noble struggle; I see this as part of the global struggle against Chief Arnook, a poison that we all must be cured from.”

Gilak nods and places a hand on Zuko's shoulder, “Come, your highness. There is much to be done.”

“Yes, there is.” Zuko agrees as the men lead the trio to their meeting tent to plan for the rebellion. 

* * *

When they make love he turns his mind into a void. His body just moves without thinking- rocking and thrusting against her, kissing and biting, licking and sucking. 

He cannot think about the way she cries and gasps beneath him. He cannot think about how she begs him to go harder and faster while running her nails down his back. He cannot think about how she works hard to please him, to be a good wife to him, to bring him happiness when she knows he did not wish to marry her. If only she knew that he did, that he schemed to be her husband. But not because he loves her but because he hates her and all she symbolizes. 

Zuko does not know what he hates the most about her anymore. Is it her for being who she is, what she is? The things she has done and the people she has killed? The way she speaks about a cleansing and a new age? Or is it the way she hums as she combs his hair? The way she sings for Aang while he plays the pipa? The way she whispers that she loves him when she thinks he is asleep?

Or maybe he hates himself. Hates himself for what he has done to her and the things he has yet to do. 

So when she reaches over to hold his hand at the Glacier Spirits Festival, he lets her because he knows that soon her entire world will crumble around her. He lets her because the person she thought she could cling to is the very person she should have been fleeing from. 

In that loud and violent moment of the rebellion, he looks down and sees her. She is frozen, trembling under the knowledge of what she has just seen him do. He rushes down towards her and for a reason he does not understand, he presses his wife against him and places a gentle hand in her hair. 

And for the first time, he allows himself to look into her eyes and truly see her as a human being, a human being just like himself. 

May the spirits help him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think you all can tell how much I love Zuko. I hope you all understand him better now in this AU. Thank you so much for the comments, kudos, and hits. I didn't expect this reception but I think we could always use some more role reversal Zutara :) 
> 
> *I know in canon that Druk is a descendant of Ran and Shaw but this is an AU so I changed the history related to dragons.*


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry in advance for the emotional distress. The tags matter.

She blinks her eyes to adjust to the darkness. 

Katara feels around the room she is in. It is stone and metal...the prison, they placed her inside the prison. The waterbender wonders how she got inside the prison but she has no idea. All she remembers is being in the great hall with Cheng, his hand in hers, then something happened...something terrible. She remembers the screams and cries, the scent of blood but not exactly what happened. They were attacked but by who? Her heart lurches as she wonders what happened to Cheng, if he is injured or even dead.

“Please, can anyone tell me what happened to my husband? I just want to know that he is okay.” 

At that she hears whispers from the other side of the door and it is slid open by a guard. 

“Who are you? Please just tell me where Cheng is.” 

Katara hears steps on the stone as someone enters her cell. The figure looks like a man but she cannot make out any identifying features in the darkness. 

“Leave us,” the voice commands the guard and her ear perks up at the sound. 

“Cheng? Oh, you are okay! Come closer so I can touch you. What is happening?” 

Cheng moves closer and she shrieks as he lights the torches in the cell with bending. Firebending. Cheng is a firebender. 

Katara lets out a cry as the memories of the hall come back to her. The rebels overtaking the hall, killing many of the officials. Cheng slicing through Silla's guards and assassinating the governor. Her body slump against his as he carried her to the prison, unable to do anything but shiver and stare blankly at him. 

Katara begins to fidget and hyperventilate. Her husband kneels down in front of her and whispers, “Just breathe, Katara. Take slow breaths.” 

After she calms, she tries to get away from him but he has her cornered in the cell.

“Are you going to kill me?” 

The firebender grabs strands of her loose hair and twists the hair between his fingers. “No, you are useful to us.” 

“And when I’m no longer useful?” 

A twisted grin splits the young man’s face, his now golden eyes gleaming in the firelight as he gets up to leave. “Katara, why ask questions you already know the answer to?”

* * *

The hours and days pass as she taps the wall in her cell, begging and pleading to be released. 

She refuses to eat, fearing that the food is poisoned. Eventually, two guards come in and force broth down her throat as she nearly chokes. 

The waterbender rests her head against her pillow, a light sheen of sweat coating her skin as she struggles against the memories of her life. Not just the killings but of Cheng, of their life together. 

She dreams of them reading scrolls and sharing tales. Of her teaching him to walk through colonies of tiger seals without waking them. Of his face twisting in pleasure as he taught her how to please him, how they discovered what pleased her. None of it was real, not one moment. 

Katara screams and throws her pillow at the wall. She stares at the ceiling, hoping this is all a terrible nightmare but wondering if maybe this is judgement from the gods for all her sins.

* * *

“Hello, daughter.”

The princess' eyes flutter open and she sees Prince Ozai standing over her with a smirk. His face is angular, too angular to be healthy, and he walks with a cane.

“I’m not your daughter,” Katara snarls, baring her teeth at the prince. 

The prince lets out a sharp laugh. “Oh but you are. When that sage cut your wrist and bound it with my son we became blood-kin. You have nothing to fear from me.”

_His son?_

The waterbender peers at his face, her eyes skimming his features. His nose, chin, and the shape of his eyes...he looks like her husband. 

“Cheng is your son?”

The firebender touches his hair, it is growing, now past his ears. “That is not his name but yes, your husband is my son.”

“What do you want from me?”

“Many things, dear girl but for right now,” Ozai turns and ushers in two maids. “You must be dressed for the election and treaty signing.”

“What is his name? My husband, what is his name?”

The older man gives her a slight glance, “Princess, you know it. You would struggle to find a person in this world who has not heard of my son.”

* * *

One maid, an older woman, bathes her and dresses her in a beautiful blue _deel_. 

“Why are you helping them?” Katara questions. 

The older woman is silent, placing jewelry on Katara’s hand and neck while a teenager combs her hair to style it into a sleek bun. Frustrated, the princess hisses, “They are our enemies.”

The teenager stops and harshly whispers, “They might be your enemies but they are not mine. They want to end this war, this war that has been stealing our families and friends from us. What are we even fighting for? They tell us in school that our tribe is great, that the gods want this for us. You cannot tell me that the gods want me to not have a father and a brother. It is a lie, it all is.”

“You can say that because you've never fought, others have fought for you.” Katara maintains as she crosses her arms while a teenager twists and pins her hair. 

The teenager looks at her with deep blue eyes, “I'm sorry, Princess. I'm sorry that you try so hard to fight against what you know to be true.”

She fiddles with her thumbs, pensive, as the girl places purple arctic flowers throughout her hair. 

* * *

Southern Water Tribe elections were known to be loud, animated affairs. In the old days, the chiefs of all the clans would vote among their ranks for the chief of the entire tribe. But that was long before her father's clan grew in power and stature, to the point where the chiefdom passed from father to son or was occasionally decided through challenge-duels from men within their clan. That was how her father became chief, by besting his cousin. 

Katara looks around the room, it is filled with Southern Water Tribe people-former outsiders and hidden separatists. There is also a good number of Fire Nation soldiers and officials, all in deep crimson. Her husband and his father sit next to her in royal battle armor, their hair in top-knots adorned with red-flame shaped crowns. The Fire Nation royals are the guests of honor, treated as brothers by her people. Her husband leans in towards her, “You look beautiful. I hope you are alright.”

Katara bites her tongue to hold back her anger, pulling at his sleeve. “You...hope...I...am...alright. Are you insane? How could I possibly be alright, I am a prisoner.”

His golden orbs search her blue ones, completely disregarding what she said, he states, “You haven't figured out my name yet.”

The waterbender crosses her arms and declares, “I know your name! I just will not speak it, people like you don't deserve respect.”

Her husband takes a sip of his ice wine and scoffs, “People like me? I'm not the one who tore people apart from the inside out, conquered cities, and murdered the greatest earthbender...well, one of the greatest earthbenders of this age.”

Ozai looks at them with sharp eyes, “Son, I am pleased that you and your wife are...uh...conversing but save such animated talk for the trip back home.”

“Trip back home?” Katara asks as her upper lip twitches slightly. 

The young firebender smirks, “Did you already forget your promise? That you would come to my home and live with me.”

A chill runs down Katara's spine, she didn't realize that he heard her say those things. Then, she meant every word but she believed he was too delirious to remember. “I thought your home was Omashu! Not the Fire Nation!”

The prince pushes stray hairs back into his top-knot. “Well, then you should have been more specific in your promise. Now, hush, they are about to announce their pick.”

The assembly erupts in shouts as they announce Gilak son of Tudek as the new chief, placing the dentalium shell necklace around his neck. The necklace her father once wore. 

_Gilak_ , a great warrior and close ally of her father. A man who was banished for revolting against unification under Chief Arnook. When her mother announced her marriage to the tribe, he stood up and called her a blood traitor.   
  
Her stomach churns as she watches the separatists praise him and congratulate each other. They celebrate while they send her off to be a prisoner of the Fire Nation, their enemies. 

Katara stands up, the ice cracking beneath her. 

“You pathetic simple people, do you know what you all have done to us? We are ruined! You think the Fire Nation will be friends to us? You are excited to trade goods with them? They will flood our market with their finished goods, wiping out our domestic industries. They will accept our raw materials, placing us in a dependent relationship with them. Our soldiers will fight in battle with them, against our cousins and friends. In the end, we will be slaves to strangers.”

Gilak stands and approaches her, with tight lips, “I’d rather be a partner to a new friend than a slave to my own brother. We’ve been dying under Northern control for years now. Hakoda, a patriot, would be ashamed of you if he knew the things you stood by and watched them do to us.”

The ice table shakes as cracks appear throughout it. “How dare you! My father is dead and buried, let him rest in peace. Do not use his name to shame me. One of us has betrayed our vows and it wasn't me.”

With a grim laugh, Gilak replies, “Yes, your vows to the North. You betrayed the South long ago. Now leave here. This entire tribe washes their hands of you.”

The firebender grabs her hand and escorts her out of the assembly house, followed by several soldiers. “Let go of me!”

He signals for his retinue to stand at a distance and he looks down at Katara, towering over her. He sighs in exasperation, “You really cannot read a room, can you? Your people wished to kill you with all the other loyalists at the festival. I’m the reason you still live.”

Katara rolls her eyes, “Are you claiming that I owe you?”

He grabs her arm and pulls her onto a sled, his soldiers joining them. “Yes. Now there is something you must do. Something you should have done long ago.”

* * *

His grip is tight on her arm as he leads her to Aang's quarters. She knows what he wants her to do, they are utterly surrounded by his retinue and Water Tribe guards so her chances for escape are very slim. 

With pleading eyes, she whispers, “No! Spirits, no! Anything but this.” 

The firebender pushes the door open and they walk in. She finds Aang playing the basic song on the pipa that he learned from the prince while bare-faced Kwa Mai and Tai sit beside an Air Nomad. 

_An Air Nomad._ The woman is clad in saffron and yellow with long black hair and pale skin. Katara can tell from her features that the woman has Fire Nation ancestry. 

Her husband bows before the woman and turns towards Katara. “Rinzen, I would like to introduce you to my wife, Princess Katara.” The woman's eyes are cold but her greeting is formal enough for Katara's status. The princess does not mind, her people massacred most of the air nomads, leaving them scattered throughout the world, the woman has a right to be cold towards her. 

Aang jumps up and pulls Katara in for a tight hug. “Katara! I missed you! Mai and Ty Lee told me that you weren't feeling well and that I had to wait for you to get better.” 

“Mai and Ty Lee?” Katara queries as she touches Aang's scalp, looking over at the two women, the two Fire Nation women. _Kwa Mai and Tai_...Mai and Ty Lee. 

Aang has a wide smile on his face as he rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, they told me before that it wasn't safe to tell me their real names but now everything is okay. Then I met Rinzen and her bison Kabo, she and Appa get along really well. Zuko said she'll take me back home to the Southern Temple.” 

“Zuko?” Katara asks as she furrows her brow. The name sounds so familiar. Zuko...the _Dragon Prince_. Her husband is the Dragon Prince. He is the man who ended the siege of Fuhuong by raining lightning down from the heavens. Who defended the grasslands from Water Tribe encroachments. Who defended the Fire Nation from the great pirate bands of the east. All those miraculous stories he told her in their bed, he was talking about himself, his own legend. 

“You are the Dragon Prince?” she exclaims with a sharp look. 

Zuko's eyes darken and his posture turns rigid. “We are not here for that right now, Katara. We are here for you and Aang. Now you will tell him the truth. You really don't want me or Rinzen to explain it to him.” 

“I won't do it.” Katara states, lowly, wrapping her arms around herself. 

Her husband leans towards her and whispers into her ear, “I remember once you told me that you would do anything I wished. I want you to tell Aang the truth.” 

She narrows her storming eyes at him. “You disgusting fire-breathing scum! What kind of person are you? He's a child!” 

“He's also the Avatar.” Zuko states, plainly. The prince crouches down to be eye-level with the twelve-year old. “Aang, I have something to tell you. Mai, Ty Lee, Rinzen, and I are here to help you. The world really needs your help.” 

The child monk purses his brow. He was told this by the monks all those years ago and he knows that the world truly needs his aid. “I know, that's why Katara taught me waterbending.” 

The prince places a comforting hand on the boy's shoulder and clearly says, “No, that's not why Katara taught you waterbending. Katara and everyone here has been lying to you.” 

“What?” Aang replies with hurt in his wide grey eyes. 

Zuko nods, “A war started 100 years ago. The Water Tribes attacked your people, many of them died. Now the Air Nomads live scattered, in fear across the world.” 

The Avatar places his lips in a thin line. “Katara wouldn’t lie to me.” 

Zuko hisses at Katara's ear, “Tell him, Katara.” 

With a shaky breath, Katara begins, “He’s right, Aang. I lied but I did it to protect you.” The waterbender wipes tears from her eyes, “I wanted to wait until we were safe in the Earth Kingdom to tell you the whole truth, I’m so sorry.” 

The cry in the child's voice is one she will never forget. “The Water Tribe killed my people?”

They all watch as Aang's eyes begin to glow as the ice room is torn apart by the winds. Aang continues rising high above them as objects begin swirling around them. Katara kneels low to the ground and Zuko barks orders at his retinue as the waterbender begins to crawl to approach Aang. 

“Katara! What are you doing?” Zuko shouts as he tries to grab onto her. 

She slowly fights against the wind to rise and stretch her arm towards Aang, finally grabbing onto him and shaking him slightly. “Aang, I'm so sorry. Please calm down. You can be angry with me, you can hate me but please calm down.”

The winds begin to subside as Aang calms himself. The child god falls into her arms and she clutches him as she tries to calm her rapid heartbeat. 

Her body sags to the floor as her world turns black. 

* * *

The first sounds she hears is the soft humming of a machine then hushed voices.

“Kasem, is she going to be alright?” A silvery female voice asks. _That voice,_ Katara thinks, _it's Tai, no, Ty Lee._

A musical and lower-pitched voice replies, “Lady Ty Lee, the princess is fine. She just needs a lot of fluids and some rest. She has been through a shock.”

Katara stirs and sits up to look around the room. Ty Lee lets out a soft gasp and the healer looks at her with clear eyes, clear blue eyes. The healer, Kasem is a man and seems to be of mixed ancestry, Fire Nation and Water Tribe. 

“You are Water Tribe,” Katara whispers. 

Kasem adjusts his top knot and stares her down. “I am not Water Tribe! I'm not one of your people. I'm Fire Nation, that is all I am.”

Hesitantly, Katara begins, “Your mother...she was a soldier, wasn't she?”

The man's eyes mist over slightly, “Yes.”

There is nothing more to be said, with that one word reply, he has given Katara a glimpse into his pain, his mother's pain, the pain her people have caused. When the guards come and handcuff her to escort her and Ty Lee to her chamber, she solemnly complies, too emotionally drained to fight back. 

Once they enter the ornate red and gold chamber, Ty Lee looks at her with large brown eyes, “Before I met you, I thought you'd be...uh...more evil. But you seemed like a normal person, a happy person, your aura was very bright after you married. I think you could even be a good person if you wanted to be.”

Katara's eyes turn a bit watery, “Good? What is good, Tai or Ty Lee, whatever the fuck your name is? Is your precious Dragon Prince that you all worship good? Is what he did to me good? Pretending to be someone else so that I could trust him, fall in love with him? If he's good then I'm fine the way I am.”

Ty Lee lets out a sigh and adjusts the pink robe covering her pink acrobatic outfit. “Fine, forget I even bothered," as she exits the room.

* * *

The moment Zuko enters the room, she begins screaming and throws anything she can get her hands on at him: pillows, books, lamps, and wooden boxes. Katara continues destroying the room and he returns with Kasem. She thrashes and cries out as Zuko holds her down for the healer to sedate her.

When she wakes up, Katara is alone in the heavy darkness.

There is a knock on the door and the prince enters the room with a tea set. She fiddles with the ends of her hair as he pours her tea. 

“Why are you here?" Katara asks, slightly trembling. 

He stands up and points to a screen divider, “That divider separates my room from your room.” 

“Why am I not in a cell?" Katara growls, looking at him with hard eyes. 

“You could always be put in one if you would prefer sleeping on a metal floor.” Zuko replies as he takes down his top-knot and sits on the cushion across from her. 

“You didn't let me say goodbye," she growls. 

His golden eyes stand out in the lowlight. “To Aang?” 

“Yura, my only close relative in the South Pole, the only one that still cared for me there.”

“I'm sorry about that, I truly am but we have a schedule to keep. You had passed out and we needed to get you medical attention on the airship.” 

“Airship?” 

“Did you not realize that we are in the sky?” he asks before taking a sip of his tea. 

Her husband, _Zuko_ , is relaxed in his red and gold outfit. He is sharing tea with her as if it is the mid-afternoon in their igloo, as if he did not spend weeks deceiving her. He is so comfortable with what he has done to her. 

With a cry in her voice, she whispers, “Please get away from me. I can't even bear to look at you. You lied to me. How do you live with yourself?” 

“Sometimes I wonder that myself,” Zuko answers wistfully. 

* * *

They only speak to each other through the divider. 

“Where is Aang?” 

“At the Southern Temple with his people. Rinzen wrote to me that he is happy.” 

“Does he hate me?” 

“I don't think he can hate anyone.” 

“Do you hate me?” 

“Why do you care what I think?” 

* * *

“When I get to the Fire Nation, will I die?” 

“We all die at some point.” 

“But when will I die, Zuko?” 

“You want an answer? You will die after I've helped crush your father's empire.” 

* * *

“I met a fortune teller once, she told me that my life had two paths, one involving love and the other involving an empire.” 

“Which path is this?” 

“I thought I knew but I don't.” 

* * *

“You’ll thank me for this.”

“Not a fucking chance.”

“You’ll understand one day. I think you have good inside you, you can change.”

“I don’t want to be good, I want to be free!”

“That could be the same thing.”

“No, with what you people think good is, it can't be.”

* * *

“Zuko, I know that I'm the Blood Princess, but if I was just a regular person, could you have grown to care for me?” 

“You are the Blood Princess. You can't change what you've done, only what you decide to do next.” 

* * *

He speaks to her in a hushed whisper, telling her the story of his grandfather and aunt's deaths. How the assassins killed them in a temple, a sacred place. How his beautiful and lively aunt was six months pregnant when she was murdered. How he had to jump into the sea to escape the assassins. 

Katara moves off her bed and pushes the divider away to walk into his room. 

He looks at her with hard eyes. “Everything I am is because of this war, your people's war. I won’t apologize for doing what must be done to save this world.” 

Katara approaches him and sits near him on his bed. She rubs her fingers on the back of his hand. “I’m sorry about your family.” 

With a sardonic laugh as tears fall on his cheeks, he says, “Why? That was a crime you didn’t commit. You were probably six when it happened.” 

Wincing, the waterbender leans closer, pressing her body against his. “I’m still sorry. My people took them away from you.” 

A shiver goes through him and he continues crying in a thin voice, “I miss them so much.” 

Katara quivers as she holds his face in her hands. The waterbender leans in, kissing and licking the tears on his face. In between kisses, she breaths, “I’m sorry, my beloved. I'm so sorry.” 

“Katara, what are you doing?” he whispers as she straddles him and begins to rock against him.

“I want to make you feel better. I'm doing what we both want.” Katara maintains as she nips at his jaw and neck, biting and kissing. 

“You aren't thinking straight, Katara. This isn't what you need. You are my prisoner.” The prince states, objectively. 

Katara brings his hand between the fold in her robe to rest at her breast, “Hush, it's okay.” Her husband clenches his jaw as he begins to knead her breast, warming them slightly with his bending.

She tangles her fingers into his hair and kisses him, increasing the rocking movement. Zuko breaks the kiss and looks into her eyes, “Katara...” he hisses as a warning. 

With a rueful smile, she says, “You were basically my prisoner in our igloo and you were going to my prisoner for the rest of your life. Now we are even.” 

His eyes are gentle when he says, “We are not even, Katara. We are enemies.” 

“Fine, dear husband. We are enemies,” Katara mutters and cups his cheek. “Do you want this?” The prince does not reply but leans in towards her as she kisses him. 

Her heartbeat is violent in her ears as they continue kissing and caressing each other as they undress. 

Katara lets out a pleased hum as he guides her onto him, relishing the feeling of being connected. The waterbender grounds into him as he thrusts into her, his fingers rubbing and pinching at the bundle of nerves above where they are joined. Sounds of passion are let out as they move together in the breathless night. When they find completion, he presses his lips against hers to hold in her cries of his name, his true name. 

With racing pulses, Katara lays her head in the crook of his neck as Zuko runs his warm fingers up and down her spine. 

At her ear, he murmurs, “We can't do this again. You love me and I've been deceiving you. You know that I don't feel what you feel for me and I don't know if...I mean, it's all distorted.” 

The waterbender presses a light kiss to his pout before detangling her body from his. She dresses before rising to run a comb through her wavy hair, trying to still her trembling hand. “This entire world is distorted, Zuko. I don't know what's real or fake anymore. Maybe I never did.” 

The firebender nods and puts on his red robe before turning away from her, towards the moon. 

* * *

Katara feels the energy of the full moon flowing in her blood. It is not as strong as it usually feels but it is there, strengthening her mind and spirit. 

The waterbender hears Hama's voice in her head: _The guards were always very careful to keep any water away from us. They piped in dry air and had us suspended away from the ground. Before giving us any water, they would bind our hands and feet so we couldn't bend. Any sign of trouble was met with cruel retribution._

_That is what our enemies will do to you if they ever catch you, Katara._

_You can never get caught._

_Never let them have you._

_Do anything to free yourself._

_Anything._

“Katara, are you asleep?” Zuko whispers into the quiet. 

“No, I'm awake. I have difficulty sleeping sometimes due to the full moon but you knew that already.” Katara replies as she twists her body in the bed. 

Zuko sits up and looks over at her. “Do you want anything? Food or some tea? I could get some scrolls from my study if you wish to read something.” 

“Can we do something?” Katara asks as she rubs her temple, trying to still her racing thoughts. 

“Depends on what it is.” Zuko says after he bites the side of his cheek. 

The waterbender lets out a breath, searching for her husband's bright eyes. “Can we go out onto the deck? I think the cool air would help calm me down.” 

There is silence for several moments and Katara can almost hear the gears turning in Zuko's head. 

“You ate all your food, right?” he asks in a low tone, clearly hesitant. 

Katara thinks back to the various soups they feed her, the soups laced with bending suppressants. Knowing her expression is hidden in the darkness, the waterbender grimaces, “Zuko, I just want to feel the night air.” 

* * *

Zuko goes into his closet to dress and comes out with a simple crimson robe and pants along with a black cloak for her to wear. 

As they leave the room, he offers her his hand and she stares at it. There was a time when she would have done anything to touch his hand or feel it against her cheek. But now...

She gives him a terse smile before slipping her hand into his. His touch warms her just slightly but nothing he ever does will take away the chill that he placed in her bones, in her soul. 

With a soft sound, they exit into the open air, feeling the coolness swirl around them. 

They climb up the stairwell to the highest point of the airship, a place where they are alone. Zuko walks up to the railing and presses his arms onto it, looking up at the moon. His pale skin illuminated by its milky glow. 

He looks beautiful, even now she still finds him beautiful. 

Katara shuts her eyes and fights through the suppressants to center herself, she bites her tongue as she begins to feel the connection flowing. She feels the wetness in the air along the blood cycling through Zuko. 

“Katara, are you okay?” Zuko asks, tentatively with an open gaze. 

With a grim smile, she replies, “No, I don't think I am.”

* * *

The firebender sinks to his knees and begins crying out as Katara tightens her hold on him. 

“How? I saw you eat.” The firebender exclaims with wide eyes. 

Katara contorts her face as she snaps, “I did eat but I guess my anger and pain is so great that I am overcoming it. My bloodbending is not as strong as it usually is but it is strong enough to do this.”

“Why?” he whispers, almost dejected. 

With a grim smile and tears in her eyes, she states, “I’m sick, remember? There’s something missing in me.”

“I thought...” Zuko begins as he struggles against her, his eyes shifting as he turns red in the face. 

“What did you think?” Katara bares her teeth at him as she drags his body closer to her. 

Zuko presses his eyes closed then forces them open. Her husband takes deep, pained breaths and with contempt, declares, “I hate you, do you hear me? I hated you before I ever set eyes on you and I hate you now. I wish I never met you, never touched you.”

The waterbender feels as if she has been pierced by a thousand knives. She knew her husband hated her, he had to in order to do such a thing to her but hearing the words out of his mouth shatters her completely. “Why did you touch me if I disgust you so much?”

With a wrathful grimace, he says, “I had a mission to complete, I had to convince you that I was someone you could trust. That was just a part of gaining your trust.”

“You cad!” she shouts. 

The prince lets an airy laugh out into the cold night air. “What are you waiting for? If you can't do it, let me go. Someone will hear this soon.”

She doesn't tighten her hold on Zuko but she just keeps her grip on his blood and pulsing heart. Her vision is distorted as her heart thunders in her chest. She feels dizzy by his blood, by him. She's touched him, felt him against her and inside her but feeling his blood, it is like lightning is racing through her.

The waterbender meets his golden eyes and sees no fear or anguish. She sees something else in them. He is the first person who is not afraid of her and her hold on him begins to falter. In the past, it was the fear of her enemies that would drive her as she sent them to the gods. But her husband has no fear, she cannot see it in his eyes or feel it in his blood. What is the point of this? Of any of it? Katara pants, “Why aren’t you begging for your life? You should fear me.” 

He tugs his lips slightly, as if he is letting her in on a precious secret. “I’ll die old and happy with someone I love, I know that.” Zuko tilts his chin upwards and narrows his eyes at her. “You are the one who is afraid. You are afraid of facing the consequences of your actions and not having control. Killing me won’t stop your past from catching up to you, it won't even help you escape. We are on a fucking airship, you can't get away!” His pink tongue slips out his mouth to touch his bottom lip as the veins in his neck strain. “You said you loved me, that you would do anything to make me happy, so listen to me. Just this once, listen to me. Let me go now and I won't tell anyone about this. It'll be our secret. Katara, you know you want to let me go. You love me, you healed me. Let me go.” 

She is outside of her own body, watching herself screaming and crying, the only thing tethering her to this world is Zuko's blood. She can hear nothing beyond the steady flow of his blood and her own cries. 

Cutting through the mist is Zuko's raspy and low voice. He speaks to her softly but firmly, “Let me go, please. I'm going to pass out, let me go before someone comes. I can't help you then.”

A shaky and pained breath escapes her lips as she slowly loosens her hold on him, freeing him from her control. If she lets go of him too quickly, she could permanently injure him and she doesn't want to. She doesn't want to hurt him. She doesn't think she ever really did. 

Katara then lets out a cry, there are sharp cuts in her arm, with blood trickling out of it. Lifting her head, she sees Mai and Ty Lee approaching her, followed by a group of royal guards. “Let him go, you monster!” Mai shouts as knives continue to slice through the air at Katara. 

Suddenly, she feels jabs in her side and back and sees the end of Ty Lee's braid swishing in the wind. Katara tries to steady herself as her body connects with the railing.

Her breath catches as she tumbles over the railing into the darkness. 

* * *

Katara lets out ear-splitting and panicked screams, her hands claw wildly, searching for anything to hold on to as she plummets towards the pounding ocean.

As she descends, she remembers everything. 

Her father's warm hugs. The push and pull of water. The overpowering stench of dead bodies on the battlefield. The satisfaction in her mind and heart as she conquered territory. The faces of the dead that haunted her. The restlessness in Agna Qel'a. Flying on Appa with Aang and Sokka. And her husband, her _husband._

The man who betrayed her, lied to her, and took advantage of her. He poured acid into her very soul, turning the person she was slowly building into nothingness. 

And yet, in what she fears to be the last moments of her life, she feels no hate in her heart for him, just the sweetness of the love she holds for him. 

His slow half-smile when she made a corny joke. His soft hair against her bare skin. The luster of his eyes, his _real_ eyes, that remind her of sun glitter on the waves. 

_Zuko._

His name is Zuko. 

Katara was going to kill him, watch his strength and light wane into a shadow as he faded into the void. Then what did she plan to do? Wrap her arms around him and lay a kiss on his warm lips as they turned cold? Then wait for his guards to kill her? What kind of monster does that? Who kills the person they love?

Even as he was powerless against her, with his beating heart in her hand, Zuko showed no fear of death. In his eyes, she even saw compassion. Compassion as if she were a human being and not an agent of destruction masquerading as one. 

Why did she ever try to convince herself that she could earn his love? She always known deep down inside what she really is, he would never care for her, not after all the things she has done. She was just struggling against the current to try to reach him, despite knowing she would never be able to overcome it. 

The waterbender hears and feels the water beneath her and summons the force to move the waves to cushion her fall. 

The coolness surrounds her and she lifts her head above the waves. Katara lets out a deep breath to blow the water out as she uses her bending to propel herself to the shoreline. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, wow. Sorry not sorry. 
> 
> Katara's entire world just crumbled around her and the person she loves revealed that they conspired against her. Add in Aang learning the truth not because Katara is ready to tell him but because Zuko forces her to do it. It was never going to end well. 
> 
> What Zuko did to her was cruel but his motive (one of his motives) is to save the world and Katara is his enemy. She was even planning to do more oppressive things, just with his help as her husband. 
> 
> Is Zuko stupid for believing her? Yes and no. I wanted this to be somewhat of a CoD moment where Zuko gives Katara a chance to demonstrate true change. Like the stakes here for Katara are much lower than for Zuko in CoD, ex: Sokka or Yue didn't show up with an escape route for Katara and a way back into Arnook's favor or something. No matter what she did to Zuko, she wasn't getting off that air ship. He gave her a chance to maybe show him that she's someone he could potentially grow feelings for but she blows it, falling back on the violent behaviors that she is used to. (It's funny because Zuko can be just as violent as she is but he's on the right side in this fic.) Now, Zuko knew he wasn't going to die but was that because Mai and Ty Lee saved him or because Katara wasn't really ever going to go through with killing him? I'll leave that open to interpretation. If anyone has any comments or thoughts please share. Thank you all for the support of this very different AU.


	6. Chapter 6

_The wind echoes like a somber melody as Katara finds her father sitting outside of their house, alone against the blissful blue sky._

_In preparation for the next hunt, the chief is sharpening his jaw blade, the rough sound scratching against the soft breeze._

_“Will you go back to Ba Sing Se?”_

_It is a simple question but it is not. Ba Sing Se is not simple, it is an obsession for their people, looming high above them like the shining moon. The great walled city holds layers of memory within memories, blood within blood, and loss within losses._

_Hakoda frowns slightly as he continues his work. “All roads lead to Ba Sing Se, moonbeam.”_

_Her eyes follow his moving hands, the relaxation and tension like the push and pull of the waves. “I’m not asking about roads, I’m asking about you.”_

_But which Hakoda is the one she speaks of? Is it the wide-eyed youngster who survived the destruction of the Western Fleet? Is it the warrior who took power from the end of a spear? The playful father who told tales by the flames? The chief who expanded their territory bringing back riches and glory? Or is it the burdened man who sits before her?_

_Hakoda shuts his eyes and takes a breath before looking at her with light blue eyes. “Since childhood, I’ve dreamed of conquering the great city, claiming it for our proud people. But now I have a new dream.”_

_“A new dream?”_

_Her bright ocean eyes meet his as she watches his expression soften._

_“Yes, dear one. A new dream.”_

_“What is it? This dream of yours.”_

_He flashes her a crooked smile as his eyes crinkle. “I cannot tell you yet, but I will soon.”_

Katara never does hear of Hakoda’s new dream.

Not long after this conversation, her world-weary father and her wide-eyed brother go across the seas to stop a rebellion on the Southern coast, Sokka for his first battle and Hakoda for his last. 

So Katara lets her questions about her father's unknown dream drift off into the wind and focuses on achieving her own. 

But from time to time, under the glowing night sky, the waterbender wonders. 

* * *

Katara is made of flesh and bone and blood, and blood, and blood.

It is blood that connects her to her family and her people. It is blood that strengthens her. 

But it is blood that weakens her, clouding her mind and heart. Poisoning her bit by bit. 

Her blood and the power that she holds drove her to hurt her husband, to reach inside him to try to find strength when she felt weak. 

She failed because his strength, his power belongs to him alone while her weakness, her fear, and her sins are her burdens to bear. 

Her husband, his rasp and his scent, his tales and his beating heart. She knew so little of him, and now she knows even less. When they married, she believed (or imagined) he was giving her small threads of himself, threads she could use to fashion an outline of a person. Katara could have lived an entire life with just that outline, it was more than enough to satisfy her heart. 

She would have done nearly anything for him, pulled down the stars to fashion a crown for him if he wished for one. 

It feels so long ago, those early naïve days. He was meant to be a prisoner, her prisoner but she convinced herself that it was okay because his cage would have been a palace. His window would have been a great balcony, overlooking the majestic streets of Omashu. His punishment would have been a life at her side and a family with her blood. Back then, she hoped that a life like that would have satisfied Cheng, that he could find happiness with her but Cheng wasn't real. None of it was real. 

When the truth of his blood and life was revealed, she found that he had given her nothing of himself, not even a thread to cling to. She was meant to be the prisoner, to live in captivity. 

Her husband held no love for her-maybe slight affection or misplaced compassion; nothing to convince her that the cage he built for her would not have been a furnace, that the flames of his land would not tear her apart. 

In anger, she lashed out at him. Hurt that she was planning a life for them as he plotted to end hers. But she is an enemy, his enemy, and what he did to her does not come close to matching the pain and fear she has spread through the world. It would take several lifetimes worth of suffering to equal what she has caused. 

So she travels through the Earth Kingdom, the air singing a wistful tune. 

* * *

It is monsoon season, the rains drenching the lands as the sun hides behind the clouds.

Her people push the water and the earth pulls it while the people flee it.

The waterbender walks through a muted and damp Earth Kingdom village. There are less jobs in the rainy season so it is not uncommon for people her age to be roaming the countryside searching for work. Despite this, she does her best to avoid eye-contact with people. 

If she looks into their faces and eyes, she begins to wonder if she killed their friends, families, or lovers. Katara knows that she is not to blame for all the ills of the world but she has contributed to a great many of them so the sadness in their eyes gives her pause. 

The waterbender hears a soft pant and a thump, looking down at the young woman she just bumped into. 

Katara crouches into the dirt to help the young woman pick up her groceries. “I'm so sorry, please forgive me for being absent-minded and not paying attention to my surroundings.”

The young woman looks up at her with sweet russet brown eyes. “No! I was also not paying attention. I’m Song, what is your name?”

Faltering, Katara begins, “My name...” 

She cannot possibly say _Katara_ , Katara is too Water Tribe, too closely identified with her identity as a warrior. She cannot say _Hualing_ either. Hualing is the name she used to conquer Omashu, to murder King Bumi. Hualing is bloodied by her past just as Katara is. 

She needs a new name, one that runs through her like smooth water and fits her attempt to represent herself as a Fire Nation colonial. 

“My name is _Mitsuki._ ” Katara smiles softly as she helps Song stand up.

Song dusts her green _hanbok_ and says, “Nice to meet you, Mitsuki.”

“Would you like to come over for dinner?” Song asks as she takes in Katara's scruffy appearance, her messy and loose hair with her dusted crimson robe and pants.

The waterbender blinks several times before nodding yes.

* * *

Song and her mother, Min-ji, are quiet and gentle people, eagerly sharing what they have with Katara. 

Min-ji cooks a wonderful meal involving multiple dishes including roast duck. They are healers and Katara feels a kinship with them. 

The waterbender gives back by helping them at the village hospital. The two women teach her traditional Earth Kingdom medicine and she resists the urge to use her waterbending, not wanting to expose her ability and wanting to respect their traditions. 

One night, as frogs croak in the night, Song approaches her under the soft pitter-patter on the roof.

Unsurely, the young woman asks, “Mitsuki, are you a war child?”

Kasem, the Fire Nation healer who recoiled at the very mention of him having anything to do with the tribes. The fatherless blue and grey-eyed children living in the countryside and the cities in the Earth Kingdom and the Fire Nation. Being shamed for things they had nothing to do with, no connection to. While she did many of the things they are being shamed for. She walks this world with blood-stained hands and a crippled heart. She hates to attach herself to innocents like them, those who have faced real suffering. Unfortunately, she has little choice, she cannot answer Song’s questions, not in any real way. 

So she nods and pinches the end of her braid, hoping to change the conversation. 

There is a pregnant pause between them, the only sound is the croaking of the frogs as Song leans in closer to Katara. 

“All the things the villagers say about Water Tribe people,” Song says, “they don’t mean people like you.” 

The faces of the injured and ill villagers and travelers pass through her mind. The teenage girls covered in bruises, the elderly with diseases from military polluted water, and the people with patterns of frosbite scars across their skin like the black scar curving across Song's leg. 

Song is wrong. Katara is just like those they fear. She is the one who burdens the sky above them. Just like the pouring rains. 

* * *

The rainy season has passed and the cloudless sky is above them. 

Golden streams of light come through the windows of the hospital, warming the patients and staff. She walks through the hospital carrying dirty towels towards the laundry room and then suddenly, she bolts upright and finds herself in her small bedroom at Min-ji and Song’s home. 

Katara rubs her temple as her eyes adjust to the room. 

“You are awake,” Song breathes in a light voice. 

Min-ji hands her a glass of water with a soft smile on her face. 

Katara takes the glass of water and takes small sips. “Am I sick?” 

The two women share a giddy look before Song blurts out, “You are doing well. Both you and your baby.”

Katara sits upright and stammers, “A baby? I’m pregnant?”

Min-ji lets out a laugh, “Yes, dear. You are going to be a mother.”

Something begins to bloom inside her as tears pool in her eyes. A fierce joy and protectiveness overtakes her body and she feels alive in a way she has never felt before. 

A baby, she is going to have a baby. 

In a soft voice, she asks, “How far along am I? Can you tell?”

Min-ji places a gentle hand at her wrist. “Dear, I believe you are seven weeks pregnant.”

Katara raises her brows slightly as she looks back on the events of the past couple weeks. Seven weeks ago...a soft blush appears on her cheeks as she remembers the night she and Zuko spent in their shared room on the airship. The feel of his warm body beneath her as they made love. To think that happened just mere hours before she bloodbended him and fell off the airship into the sea. 

_I’ll die before I ever tell my child about the night they were conceived,_ she thinks. 

The three women enjoy soup dumplings and light tea in the quiet of Katara’s room. 

Min-ji places a gentle hand on Katara’s arm and declares, “We are not going to ask you about the father or your family. I just want you to know that you and your baby have a home here with us.”

Katara wipes the tears that fall down her cheeks and allows the two women to pull her into a hug.

* * *

Her hands move over a young man's arm as she rubs ointment across his rash. As she focuses on her task, she hears a flurry of activity outside the hospital in the center of town. 

Katara leaves the hospital and walks out into the open air with the sun looming high above her. 

There is a gang of waterbenders, Water Tribe soldiers, outside the mayor's office, yelling and shouting at the people, threatening to loot the town bare for not treating them as honored guests. 

She watches as the villagers cower in fear and she cannot stomach the fact that she ever once wished for others to fear her. 

“Leave them alone.”

The men turn around and face her with a grim-faced burly man approaching her, his uniform signifying that he is the commander. “What is a pretty triber like you doing here in the middle of nowhere?”

Katara lets out a sigh and narrows her eyes at the man. He does not recognize her, none of them do. So she says an old army saying, one associated with the 12th division, “The water is our source, our strength and our hope. Our blood and our bond, our life and our strife.”

The man lets out a deep laugh. “A woman would know nothing of the great 12th division, only one woman has ever served among their ranks.” The man's eyes widen slightly as recognition comes over him, “Unless...you cannot be her. You cannot be the Blood Princess.” 

Katara takes a breath to steady herself before stating, “But I am. I am Princess Katara, daughter of Chief Hakoda and Kya. Adopted daughter of Chief Arnook. Conqueror of Omashu.” 

The babble of the crowd increases until she can hardly hear her own thoughts.

The commander bows before her, “You are banished but I admire you for what you have done for our people. Therefore this day, I will grant you one request. What is your will?” 

The princess raises a slight eyebrow and wipes the sweat off her brow. “My will? Leave these people be, never visit this village again. They have my favor.” 

The commander looks at the cowering people then turns back towards Katara. He lets out a slight smirk and turns to the people, “I will honor this request, your highness.” The waterbender narrows his eyes at the terrified villagers. “You all are lucky that a princess of a proud and noble bloodline has taken pity on your pathetic dirt lives. She has done more in her life than the past twelve generations of your woeful families.” 

Shortly after the commander and his soldiers leave, Katara holds her head high despite the intense hatred in the eyes of the villagers. The people that she has helped and lived with for the past couple weeks. 

The mayor, a gravelly-voiced man with winter-white hair approaches her. “We will allow you to leave without harm, we are not like your people. Now leave our village and never return, you savage.”

It is when she passes in front of Min-ji and Song that the tears threaten to overwhelm her. 

Song's hands shake as she hands Katara her belongings and the reins of an ostrich-horse, Saffron. 

“I'm sorry,” Katara whispers but neither Song nor Min-ji meet her eyes. 

The sun is still high in the sky when Katara places the _weimao_ on her head and rides eastward, towards a great city and a debt that has been sitting heavy on her heart. 

* * *

The Omashu resistance is camped out in the forests just outside the city walls with access to the sewers below the city. 

She approaches one of their camps with light steps and announces her presence, raising her hands to show that she is unarmed. 

A mustached young man speaks as the group surrounds her. 

“Who are you?”

The waterbender bites her bottom lip before replying, “No one of any importance.”

She spends days in their camp, providing them with information about the formations and schedules of the troops within the city. She meets with them in the sewers, teaching them how to disarm the elite forces guarding the interim governor and his family. The people know that she is of Water Tribe ancestry but they assume that she is mixed with Fire Nation blood, a member of some other resistance group. Some of the members remain suspicious of her and how she appeared out of thin air but the mustached man, _Haru_ , supports her, convincing the others to trust her. 

The morning before they plan to liberate the city, Katara readies herself to leave the encampment. 

Haru's green eyes reflect the sunlight as he speaks to her in hushed tones. “I could help you, you don’t have to leave. You shouldn't be alone and you don't have to be. I really want to know you.”

The waterbender gives the young man a brittle smile. “I don’t even know myself.”

She places her pack on her ostrich-horse and walks to the edge of the camp, Haru following behind her. 

With a soft look, the young man asks, “I will see you again, right?”

“I highly doubt it,” Katara replies as she mounts Saffron. 

A soft and steady breeze moves through her hair as she heads towards Kirliq Stronghold and her brother.

* * *

Katara pulls her cloak around her face, riding past the wanted posters that have sprouted up in Water Tribe controlled areas since the incident in Song's village. 

The Kirliq Stronghold is an imposing fortress in the eastern Earth Kingdom, named for the general who led the raids of the Eastern and Western Air Temples. Sokka had been serving at the stronghold since her banishment, working on new technology and gathering allies in the Water Tribe military against Arnook. 

She enters a tavern in the village near the stronghold, one that Sokka had written to her about frequenting and waits for her brother to appear. 

Sokka enters through the door, his appearance made distinct by his unwieldy frame, the eyepatch covering his left eye, and the scars across his arms. 

He sits down on a bar stool and Katara asks the bartender to pay for Sokka's drink. Her brother takes the drink, sipping as he searches the tavern for a familiar face. His eye widens slightly when he makes her out and he discreetly approaches her. 

With a wide smile on his face, he kisses her cheek as his eye mists over. “I've been so worried about you. I'm so happy that you are okay. Spirits, first banished then kidnapped by the ashmakers then declared a traitor for helping a dirt village, what a year you've had.” 

“Don't say things like that.”

“Like what?” Sokka asks as he takes a sip of his wine. 

Katara places a hand on her stomach, “Dirt villages and ashmakers. They are people like us, just people.”

Sokka shrugs his shoulders. “Sure, fine. Anyway, I want to hear all the details. How did you escape? Where are they holding Aang? Did they kill your husband? How many of their people did you send to the gods?”

“It's a really long story, Sokka,” the waterbender says before biting her lips. “I'd rather focus on what you have been doing.”

The warrior pushes stray hairs back into his wolf-tail and half-grins. “Sure, but first let me get you some ice wine.”

“No!” Katara blurts out, holding her palms outward. “I mean, I just don't feel like having any,” she maintains. 

“Are you okay? You love ice wine.” Sokka states with a slightly furrowed brow. 

The waterbender pinches the end of her braid and lets out a soft breath. She takes her brother's hand in hers and looks into his sky-blue eye. “Sokka, I'm going to tell you something. I need you to promise to not freak out.”

With a slight frown and a bit of hesitation, Sokka says, “Okay...I promise. Sis, you are acting really weird. Did you knock your head or something?”

Katara places a hand to Sokka's ear before whispering, “I'm pregnant.”

Her brother nearly jumps out of his chair, knocking the table. Katara quickly grabs his arm and yanks him down. 

“Tui's gills! How? Who?”

“My husband is the father. And how? Sokka, did you really just ask that?”

Sokka's face blanches as he grimaces in disgust. “I, uh, wow. Is your husband even still alive?”

Katara fiddles with her thumbs, this whole situation is really a huge pile of polar-bear dog shit. Once she explains everything to Sokka, he'll want to flood Caldera himself. 

“Again, Sokka, it is a really long story. One that I can't explain in a tavern.”

* * *

In her small room at an unassuming inn, Sokka's eyes darken as he declares, “Katara, I know you don't want your baby to be fatherless but once I find your husband, I will kill him.”

Katara feels like pulling her hair out. “Sokka, did you hear a single word of what I spent the past hour explaining? He's the Dragon Prince, you can't kill him. I couldn't even kill him!”

Her brother begins speaking, physically pained by what he is saying. “Yeah, but you are in _love_ with him.”

The waterbender fiddles with her robe, not denying what he said. Instead, she responds, “That has nothing to do with the fact that you can't kill him.”

Sokka bites the inside of his cheek. He growls, “Fine, maybe I can't kill him but I can give him the beating of his life.”

Katara doesn't tell him that he can't do that either, instead she flashes him a soft smile and pulls him in for a hug. 

Over warm jasmine tea, the siblings discuss the Water Tribe rebel movement and the connections Sokka has been building with them. 

“You aren't going to believe who I came across at one of the meetings,” Sokka exclaims as he sets down his tea cup. 

“Who?” Katara queries as she pushes stray hairs out of her face. 

A smile cuts across the warrior's face and with a shine in his eye, he whispers, “Bato.”

* * *

Under an endless sky, the siblings travel westward for three days, up into the mountains to a tiny village that was a _daofei_ outpost in Kyoshi's time.

They walk up a winding pathway to a humble dwelling with a small garden attached to it. 

An older bearded man is tending to the gardens, pulling the weeds from the earth. The man rises and faces them, his grey hair unkept and wild around him. When their eyes meet, Katara nearly gasps. 

The man's eyes are calm like the gentle sea; they are eyes that she has known her entire life.

 _Bato_ , the aged-man is Bato. 

Slowly, he approaches them, crying as he brings the both of them into his strong arms.

* * *

They sit at his table and he tells them of the trouble that he and their father would get into in their youth. Some of the tales they had heard before but a couple they had not, either way they bring a lightness to their hearts, like sunlight peeking out from behind the clouds.

Later, as Sokka snores in his cot, Katara finds Bato on the porch looking out at the starry sky. 

The older man pushes his hair back behind his ear. “Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant?”

Katara lets out a dry cough. She stammers, “How did you know?”

With a knowing smile, Bato replies, “You look just as your mother did when she came back from the North pregnant with you. Sokka, the little rascal, was squirming as your father exited the boat onto the dock, begging to go back to the Northern palace.”

_My parents took a trip to the North when Sokka was a baby? Mom came back pregnant with me?_

With a pinched brow, Katara asks, “What are you talking about, Bato? No one has ever told us that my parents took a trip to the North when Sokka was a baby.”

She watches as Bato's expression changes slightly, “Yes, a relative of your grandmother had passed. I believe her older brother. Your parents and Sokka went North with her to pay their respects. It was also the New Moon Celebration, your parents had an audience with Chief Arnook in his palace.”

A shiver runs through Katara and she has no idea why. An edge of fear appears in her voice, “Something happened on that trip. What happened?”

The warrior's mouth shifts into a straight line, “I fear it is not my place to tell you such things, Katara.”

She swallows down her fury and returns back inside, she lays down on her cot and tries to sleep as anger vibrates in her chest.

The mountain is covered in rosy light as Katara takes a walk in the cool morning air. Her chestnut hair is loose down her back as she places a gentle hand at her slight bump. 

She twists her head as she hears Bato clear his throat. The man is holding a tattered and worn leather-bound book. He hands the book to her and Katara takes it, running her fingers over the cover. 

With his hands clasped behind his back, Bato murmurs, “This book was your father's journal, he would write thoughts and memories in there. He gave it to me before we went into that final battle. I didn't tell you about what happened because I think you would rather read him describe his own life. He had a way with words that I do not.”

The waterbender stretches her arm to bring Bato in for a hug. “Thank you,” she whispers as tears begin to cloud her vision. 

Katara doesn't know how long they stand like that, hugging in the morning light. 

* * *

The waterbender walks down the winding pathway, leading Saffron down the mountain-side as Sokka and Bato whisper to each other. 

“What are you two talking about?” Katara asks with the sun in her face. 

Sokka tilts his head to look at Katara. “Sis, I have to rush back to Kirliq, I can't have my superiors starting to ask questions about my behavior. I think it's best for you to go with Bato to meet the main resistance group. With Bato there to vouch with you, they'll trust you.” 

Katara bites the inside of her cheek. She never really thought about what she was going to do once she found Sokka, she was just letting the river guide her along her path and it guided her to Bato. 

She gives her brother a quick nod, agreeing to his plan.

When they reach the bottom of the mountain, she says her goodbyes to Sokka, pressing a couple wet kisses on his cheek to annoy him as she tears up. 

Her brother waves as she and Bato start off on the pathway going in the opposite direction. 

The road is smooth as Saffron trots along. “Where are we going, Bato?” 

Bato clutches the reins of his ostrich-horse and looks over his shoulder at her. “Katara, all roads lead to Ba Sing Se.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh!! So this chapter was basically Katara's version of Zuko's Book 2 experiences with some twists and turns (steambaby!!! steambaby!!!). Sokka isn't super over-protective of Katara because Katara for so long has been an agent of death and destruction so he knows that she can handle herself. I hope you all enjoyed reading our Blood Princess grow and change. It's happening.


	7. Chapter 7

The cold, clear air hits his cheeks as he looks down from his balcony, watching the crowds make their way through the streets of Yu Dao. 

Zuko's hand shakes slightly as he lights his cigarette, he hasn't smoked in years but this feels like as great a time as any to take it up again. He then takes a deep drag from his cigarette and feels the deep-seeded tension leaving his body.

As smoke swirls around him, he thinks of his mother in Caldera, thanking the gods that she isn't here to snatch the cigarette from his mouth. 

His frowns slightly as he wonders whether her intense anger at him for _running off_ to the bottom of the world has been replaced by joy as she awaits his return to the palace. 

_Probably not_ , he thinks as he takes another deep drag. 

“Spirits! Please tell me you aren't smoking that cheap Earth Army tobacco Jet sent you?”

He twists his head over his shoulder to see Mai and Ty Lee standing in the doorway, looking quite annoyed with him. 

He exhales the smoke and sighs. “I am, Ty Lee. What are you going to do, send a hawk to my mom?”

Zuko turns away from them, focusing on the overturned cabbage cart and the screaming street vendor in the street when Mai takes his arm and pulls him to sit down at the small table. 

They are silent for several good long minutes as Zuko continues to smoke. The uneasy silence is broken by Mai. 

“What did you tell the great masters?”

He puts his cigarette out in the ashtray and lets out a soft breath. “The truth. I placed her in my quarters instead of a cell. I let her go outside and she bloodbended me before falling off the airship. Don’t worry, I took full responsibility for how my behavior endangered my own life and the lives of those who served under me.”

Ty Lee furrows her brow and adjusts her long cloak. “Do you not care that you are suspended?”

Annoyed at his hair blowing in the wind, Zuko takes a hair tie to tie his dark hair back. “If those gasbags want to pretend they cared about her welfare when they planned to confine her to a plain apartment in Yu Dao, who am I to stop them? If she's truly dead then we have one less member of Arnook's bloodthirsty family to worry about.”

Mai lets out a sardonic laugh. “You still aren't that good at this.”

“At what?” Zuko asks as he pinches the skin on the back of his hand. 

Mai looks at him with hard, stony eyes. “Forget it, Zuko.”

* * *

The royals take careful, measured steps as their red robes blend into the morning sky. Their retinue walks behind them as mother and son enter the main section of the High Temple of Caldera. 

They bow before the sages as they anoint their foreheads with holy oil. The welcoming prayers are recited in the old tongue as they hand them cups of spiced tea. 

Zuko stares into the cup as the sounds of his aunt’s cries echo in his mind. The prince slowly brings the cup up to his nose to smell it. 

With some hesitance, Ursa asks, “My love, is something wrong?”

Their eyes meet briefly before Zuko drinks the spiced tea, feeling the warm liquid go down his throat. “Nothing, Mom. I'm fine.”

* * *

_His eyes stare at the ceiling of their igloo as he takes slow, even breaths to calm himself from their lovemaking._

_He hates the soft warmth of Katara’s skin against his as she whispers sweet things to him. Zuko almost wishes he could have seen her in battle, tearing his compatriots and their allies apart so her capacity for cruelty would never be far from his thoughts. He finds remaining aware of her sins increasingly difficult as the days and months pass._

_His wife is boneless and sated, her arm draped across his chest as she nuzzles into his neck. As her eyes close, Katara whispers, “I hope our first child looks just like you.”_

_He wants to tell her that he doesn’t care what their child looks like as long as they are a boy and can waterbend but he cannot tell her such things. At least not yet, not while he still has to feed her lies dipped in honey. So he passes his fingers through her hair and listens to her soft breathing._

The firebender jolts awake, disoriented as his eyes adjust to the lowlight of his bedroom. He frantically runs his hands along the silk sheets of his bed, gripping them to remind himself that she isn’t really there. 

(She’s not here, she’s dead.)

His heartbeat calms as he lays against his pillows, waiting for sleep to come.

* * *

Flowers gently fall around the royal siblings as they meditate in the royal gardens. 

Zuko tries to center himself but cannot, his thoughts running wild, conjuring up his deepest fears. He takes a breath before opening his eyes to look at Azula. 

His sister looks serene in her blush red training outfit, her bangs flowing in the soft breeze. 

In a soft whisper, he asks, “Do you think Agni will punish me?”

Azula opens one eye then the other. “For what?”

The prince pinches the crook in his thumb. “For causing the death of my child. An innocent.”

Azula does not spare him a glance, preferring to examine her manicured hands. “She wasn’t pregnant, Zuzu,” she says, matter-of-factly. 

He raises a brow slightly, not willing to take comfort in her words, at least not yet. “How do you know?”

“Kasem would have told you on the airship if she was. He examined her, remember?”

Zuko stares at the falling blossoms as he takes in her words. 

Azula scoffs as she rises, “So rest your pretty little head, brother. You haven’t committed prolicide, just uxoricide.” Then she pauses, focusing her eyes on him. “Unless there is something you haven't told Dad and I.”

Their eyes meet for a moment and he tries to keep his face neutral. Of course he didn't tell them everything that happened that night. Why would he? He and Katara were intimate just hours before she attempted to murder him. Zuko reminds himself that if the waterbender is truly dead then it doesn't really matter. 

Azula leaves and Zuko flops down on the grass, searching for patterns in the clouds. 

* * *

Iroh uses his lily tile to capture Zuko's chrysanthemum tile. 

Zuko moves his rose tile upward on the board and states, “Ty Lee is going to join Lu Ten's forces at the Eastern Sea. Your son may return from the Earth Kingdom engaged.”

A soft smile appears on Iroh's face. “Yes, he has written to me a great deal about her. A sweet girl who brings his heart great joy. That is all I wish for him.” The part about how he wishes that for Zuko remains unsaid. 

“And Lady Mai?” Iroh queries, his voice light. 

Zuko chokes slightly and puts down his cup. “I haven't spoken much with her since I returned.”

The Fire Lord sighs and moves one of his tiles forward. “I would not be surprised if she is upset, you were her bamboo horse.”

“Uncle, I have no idea what you are talking about,” Zuko states as he captures Iroh's jasmine tile with his rose tile. 

With a slight frown, the old man says, “The two of you were childhood sweethearts. You have been lifelong friends. She will worry for you just as we do.”

Zuko pinches the bridge of his nose. “Worry for me? There is nothing to worry about.”

Iroh narrows his amber eyes at his nephew. “Then why do you smell of smoke and incense all the time? Secretary Reo tells me that you leave your office at regular intervals to light incense at the temple.”

Zuko growls, “I thought Secretary Reo was a member of my staff, not your spy!”

The Fire Lord's crown glitters as he places a hand on top of Zuko's. “Nephew, calm yourself. It is just unsettling to all of us to see you so... _haunted_.”

“Haunted? That's exactly what I'm trying to not be. The princess is dead and I want her spirit to be at peace, not lingering around me.”

Iroh speaks slowly, taking the time to choose his words. “You lived with her as her husband for six months, it is understandable that some things would carry over with you. That as time went on the line between your mission and your feelings would blur. This is exactly why I did not wish for you to have done this. I did not want you to be burdened this way.”

Suddenly, Zuko becomes overcome by anger, hissing at Iroh. “Uncle, I think I _still_ hate her. I hated having to live with her, hearing her go on and on about the greatness of their nation and the new world they were building. I hated hearing her talk about the life we would have together in Omashu. I hated pretending I didn't wish to see her pay for all she's taken from this world. She killed one of your greatest friends! She nearly killed me! Maybe I’m even glad she's dead so I no longer have to deal with her.”

The Dragon of the West locks eyes with The Dragon Prince, the obvious dishonesty of Zuko's statement apparent to him. 

Zuko readies himself to be chastised by his uncle for his cruelty but Iroh says nothing. The old dragon just takes a sip of his tea before capturing another one of Zuko's tiles.

* * *

Ozai leans on his cane while his children sit on a couch, awaiting his instructions. The elder prince touches his now-neck length hair before speaking. “Why do you believe the girl is dead?”

“She fell out of an airship into the open ocean.” Zuko blinks several times before continuing, “She’s a very powerful waterbender but that doesn’t mean she survived a fall from that height.”

Azula crosses her arms and speaks in hushed tones. “If I didn't know better, I would think that you are having doubts about your mission. About having to sire a son and raise them to be chief, knowing that you killed their mother and her family.” 

Zuko snaps, baring his teeth at Azula. “Spirits, what is wrong with you? There is nothing I would not do for this nation! The waterbender is dead. Accept it.”

Ozai’s golden eyes shift from his son to his daughter. “Dear one, do not doubt your brother’s patriotism. He lived amongst our enemies for months, pretending to be a pathetic and weak Earth Kingdom prince. Not only did he free me from prison, he saved the Avatar, and split Arnook’s kingdom. His name shall be remembered for generations. Zuko is a dragon amongst men and I am proud to have fathered him.”

The prince’s eyes widen slightly as he takes in Ozai’s praise. Still, it jolts him, the idea that his father is truly proud of him. Their relationship became closer after his miraculous return to Caldera but Azula was and still is his favorite child just as Zuko is Ursa's favorite child. Things like that do not change. “Thank you, Father. You honor me with such words.”

Ozai places a hand on Zuko’s shoulder. “Now son, if you believe that the waterbender is truly dead then you would not mind giving me something of hers.”

“Why?”

“So you could go to sleep knowing that she is truly dead. Knowing that your mission is complete and there is no more for you to do.”

Zuko nods and walks over to his nightstand. He opens it and takes out the dagger Katara gave him, the one that once belonged to Hakoda. He runs his finger along its edge, remembering the soft look in her eyes when she gave it to him. “This belonged to her father but she led me to believe that she also wore it at times.”

Ozai takes the knife, his pale arm covered in faint white scars before exiting the room with Azula. 

An odd feeling settles into Zuko’s stomach as if he just did something wrong. He walks to the stables to try to shake it off. 

The prince smiles as Druk greets him, licking his face. 

_[I missed you, cousin.]_

“And I you,” Zuko says as he runs his hands along Druk’s scales. “Do you want to go flying?”

The dragon sniffs Zuko. _[You are sad. Why?]_

“I was sad when I was far from here. But now I am happy.”

Druk gives Zuko a look like he only half-believes him but soon they are up, flying towards the heavens. 

Zuko smiles, his first true smile in months, as a lightness overtakes him. 

In the skies, there is no guilt or shame, only joy.

* * *

The air in Mai's tearoom is chilled as Zuko sips his tea. The noblewoman avoids his eyes as she takes small bites of her fruit tart as she has been avoiding him at court events since their return. If her parents did not wish for them to become engaged, he doubts that he would have been allowed in her home. Nearly, everyone in court is waiting for them to announce their engagement and go back to how they once were. 

At times, he himself has wondered if they could ever return to their old relationship, but now, after everything, he knows that they cannot. He is different, they both are.

The cinnamon tea has given the room a soft sweet scent and his mind wanders back to the South Pole. Elder Yura had given them cinnamon bark and began to lecture about needing to nourish Katara's yang energy before Zuko completely zoned out of the conversation. That skill was one that he had perfected in his early childhood, bored by the amounts of religious lectures he and Azula were forced to attend at the temple. 

Mai's voice cuts through the haze. “Zuko, you aren't a good liar. I know you. So don't pretend that you aren't bothered by this. You feel something...maybe it is guilt but it is _something_.”

Zuko bites his lip and taps his finger on the edge of the table. “What do you wish for me to say? That I fell in love with her or that I miss her? I just feel sorry for her, sorry that she lived like that. Her people...they were killing and fighting, not to protect anything or anyone but because they wanted more than what they already had.”

The noblewoman's tawny eyes peer into him. “Do you think she could have changed? Ty Lee did.”

Her smile as she played with Aang and taught him things. The dedicated way she cared for ~~him~~ Cheng when he was injured, often going without sleep to sit at his side.

Their marriage was seen as an indignity among her people.

_(The banished princess wed to a prince of a conquered kingdom.)_

Katara could have been cold to him, he even prepared for it. He did not prepare for her to accept and love him without ever expecting that love to be returned. She hated Arnook and Silla, all those who abused their authority. She admitted that the tribes needed to be governed differently. If he had more time with her...he could have helped her. Maybe in the end his father’s plan wouldn’t have been necessary. Maybe they could have-No! He gave her a chance, they touched each other, and she still tried to kill him. 

She’s dead(?). She’s dead. 

What difference does any of that make now? 

“I'm not sure and I guess now we can't find out,” he says as he takes a long sip of his tea. 

And yet, sometimes he can still hear her voice, the way it sounded on the airship, soft and strong from the other side of the divider. The questions she asked and the replies he could have given.

Softly, Zuko begins, “Katara asked me something.” He tries to steady his voice to continue, “She asked if she was a normal person...would I- _could I_ have cared for her.”

“What did you tell her?”

“I think I told her that she could only be herself but I wish I told her something else.”

“What do you wish that you told her?”

“Yes.”

* * *

Zuko, Toph, Suki, and Jet make their way to the upper levels of the Southern Air Temple. The group takes loud and deep breaths once they reach their destination. Zuko is trying to steady himself when he is nearly knocked over by the impact of Aang's hug. 

The boy tightens the hug and exclaims, “You came! You really came!” 

Breathlessly, Zuko whispers, “Of course, I wouldn't miss this for the world.” 

Aang leads them to the pavilion for the master ceremony, the first one held on temple grounds since the start of the war. The pavilion is decorated with orange and yellow ribbons and rows and rows of glass chimes. 

There is a palpable sense of joy and reverence among the crowd, watching the airbenders funnel wind up towards the heavens, the white noise carrying through the breeze. 

The elders speak of their perseverance in the face of adversity, of praying and hoping, of walking the world, searching for rest. And finding it when Aang returned to them. _Aang_ , the god child, who was lost but has been found. Generations of people have lived and died waiting for him to return. And here he is. Beaming as he participates in the ceremony. The absolute joy on his face is one that Zuko will never forget. A calm settles in his spirit as the chimes continue ringing out. 

Everything he did in the South Pole helped Aang arrive here, safe and whole with his people. 

Suddenly, he feels Suki tugging at his sleeve, her brows knitted. “Are you okay?” 

“I'm fine,” he whispers. 

Suki's face softens, “It's just...you are crying.” 

He brings his fingers up to his cheeks, wiping the wetness away. With a half-smile, he says, “I'm fine, I just understand.” 

Suki nods and lets go off his sleeve, returning to watch the new masters be welcomed by the elders. 

* * *

Zuko stands in a corner eating a macaroon as his friends dance during the celebrations. He chuckles, watching Toph dance with Aang, somehow that little nomad was able to convince the earthbender to join him. 

He is just about to retire to his room when he bumps into a young woman. Zuko blurts out, “Sorry! I'll get out of your way.” 

Her pale cheeks tint light pink. “No! I was coming over here to talk to you.” 

“Why?” Zuko asks as he focuses on her dark upturned eyes. 

The woman pushes her brown hair behind her ears. “I wanted to ask you to dance.” 

Her blush deepens as Zuko stares at her. She stammers, “Do you not want to dance with me?” 

“Oh, I mean, okay but what's your name?” 

With dimpled cheeks she replies, “I'm Yee-Li.” 

“I'm Zuko,” he states as he offers her his hand, leading her to dance. 

“I know,” Yee-Li says. 

As they dance, he copies her movements, switching from slow spinning to hopping on one foot. 

The dance moves steadily increase in rigor and he almost stops when he notices his friends looking at him. 

Jet has a slow smirk on his face as Toph and Suki whisper to each other. Aang looks over and begins to shout and cheer. “Zuko! You are a really good dancer!”

Zuko flushes as his dance partner laughs softly. “Thanks, Aang.” 

Later, he walks Yee-Li up to her room, with a soft lantern light to guide their path. 

The nomad presses a kiss to his cheek before looking up at him through dark eyelashes. “Do you want to come in?”

His eyes trail over her smooth skin in the soft moonlight. “I can't. I have to leave by sunrise.”

She squeezes his hand slightly, hiding her disappointment well as she walks into her room. 

The prince returns to his shared room with Jet and slumps onto his twin bed. 

Jet raises his head from his bed. “What happened? Don't tell me you can't get it up for a regular woman anymore? It would be a shame if that dead psycho-killer ruined you.” 

Zuko's heart clenches at the insult but he presses his face into the pillow. “No, it's just...she looked too much like Ty Lee.” 

Jet lets out a deep laugh, satisfied by his friend's answer. 

Moonlight streams through the window as Zuko dreams of Katara's body tumbling over and her piercing screams. 

* * *

They make camp in a rocky open area as Toph teaches Aang the basics of earthbending. The pair had been gone for hours and Jet had set out to retrieve them for dinner. 

He smiles softly at Druk and Appa napping in the shade as he chops vegetables for their dinner. Next to him Suki stirs the large pot over the open fire. “Was she normal...as a kid?”

The _she_ in question does not need to be named. 

A slow smile forms on the warrior's face as she reminisces. “She was really sweet and kind. She loved helping people, she would help out at the clinic in my village. When they visited, she always made sure we included the other village kids in our games. Most of them did not want to play with us for...uh...obvious reasons.”

Zuko nods and continues chopping the onions and peppers along with the fresh herbs. So softly, that his voice is almost lost in the wind, he whispers, “Do you miss her?”

Her auburn hair is tousled slightly as she whispers, “Sometimes.”

* * *

Aang begs them to make a detour to Omashu before reaching Ba Sing Se to gather more allies for the Great Comet. Zuko scowls, Jet sighs, and Aang grins when they see the celebrations throughout the city. The people dance and shout in the streets, thanking the spirits that they have been liberated and their king avenged. The firebender places a gentle hand on Aang's shoulder as they walk through the crowds as Jet and Suki direct the child's attention away from the workers replacing the blood-stained stones where a mob beat the interim colonial governor and his family to death. 

He squeezes Aang's shoulder as they pass by a statue of King Bumi. It was difficult for many in the order and the broader resistance to hear of his death but Bumi was one of Aang's closest childhood friends. If the pair was able to reconnect, Bumi could have served as one of Aang's links between his old world and the current world. The prince silently curses Katara for what she stole from the boy. He is thankful that she's no longer able to cause him harm. 

They reach the palace and enter into a meeting room. The city is now governed by a council until a new king can be elected or a member of King Bumi's bloodline is found. 

A young mustached man looks over at them and smiles as he approaches Jet. The two men embrace before Jet introduces Haru to them. 

Over bowls of claypot rice Haru and another rebel talk about the the mysterious woman who aided them.

“She was the most inspiring person I have ever met. Beautiful and brave. She didn't care about getting credit, she just wanted to help us. She was pretty shy, it took her two days before she even told us her name,” Haru sighs. 

The earthbender's friend lets out a laugh. “Spirits, Haru! I can't believe you are actually in love with her. She was with us for maybe two weeks and didn't share anything about her background. I doubt she even gave us her real name.”

Haru snaps at his friend, “Okay, so she was running from something! We could have convinced her to stay if the rest of you cared enough.”

His friend rolls his eyes, “She was never going to stay with you. She definitely had a man back in the tribes.”

Jet narrows his eyes at them, “I thought you two said she was Fire Nation?”

Haru rubs the back of his neck, “She was! Her name was Mitsuki and she was wearing red clothes.”

Zuko scoffs and gestures to his Earth Kingdom style robes, “I'm wearing green right now. Am I suddenly Earth Kingdom?”

Suki locks eyes with Zuko before turning towards Haru. “Can you describe her?”

The earthbender gets a far-off look in his eyes. “She had long and flowing brown hair. She was short and slender along with being a trained fighter. Her skin was rich and smooth. Her eyes...they looked like the sea.”

Aang looks up from his bowl and his eyes widen. “Did she smell like lavender and cinnamon? When she talked did she use her hands a lot? Did she like garlic in her food? Did she hate papaya?”

Haru strokes his mustache and furrows his brow. “She did...are you all playing a trick on me because it seems like you know her.”

* * *

Later that night, Zuko paces in their apartment, trying to calm the tempest swirling in his mind. 

_She's dead. She's dead. She's dead. That couldn't have been her. Even if she is alive, she would never liberate a city that she conquered. But what if it is her? What if this is part of some grand plan to get Aang to trust her so she can kidnap him? What if it isn't even about Aang? What if it's about me? What if she is doing this so I can let my guard down and she can kill me?_

Toph slides the door open, holding a glass of baijiu. “Zuko, you are going to burn a hole in the floor if you don't stop! Also whatever you are thinking about...stop. I came in here because I thought you might be dying, your heart is beating faster than a dragonfly-hummingbird.”

Zuko takes the glass of baijiu from her hand and quaffs it in one gulp. 

The earthbender lets out a gasp in surprise before punching his arm. “What the fuck is wrong with you? That was mine, you spoiled prince!”

Slumping into a chair, the prince begins to rub his face. “Toph, do you remember what I told you about Katara?”

“Katara? You mean the girl everyone calls a deranged puppet-master, a witch from the southern seas, and a psycho-killer...”

Zuko pinches the bridge of nose, “Yes, her! The dead woman I was married to. I just...what if she isn't dead?”

Walking closer to Zuko, Toph's face shifts into a neutral expression. “Repeat what you just said. The last part.”

“What if she isn't dead?”

A mischievous grin cuts across Toph's face as she cackles. 

Zuko's face pinches, “What is wrong with you?”

Toph turns and walks out of Zuko's room. “Nothing, Zuko. Absolutely nothing. I'm just really excited for our trip to Ba Sing Se, that's all.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, Zuko has some issues. He feels guilty about Katara's death, may or may not actually still hate her while he has also possibly developed some feelings for her. But she's dead so he's not going to think about it. (She's dead, right?) 
> 
> So Ozai's terrible plan for Katara, the one that Zuko was hiding from the White Lotus is revealed. I hope you all aren't too surprised, I can't ever imagine a truly "good" Ozai. There is a ruthless streak in their family. What is a perfect way to insure your enemies no longer threaten you? Blend your bloodline with theirs and rule them.
> 
> P.S. bamboo horse refers to a Chinese saying about childhood lovers: green plums and bamboo horses.


	8. Chapter 8

All her life she had been taught to hate Ba Sing Se-to hate the excess of their noble and middle classes and how they kept their impoverished isolated in the lower ring. She can almost hear her mother’s voice: _A true community is one that brings people together not one that pushes them apart. The Earth Kingdom is not yet a true community but with our people's guidance and aid, we will make them one._

It is ironic, the sweet lies they told themselves about the other nations, considering their war has broken apart so many families and communities. 

Bato leads her into an old and modest apartment building, their new home. As they walk through the courtyard, Bato has to grab Katara's arm to pull her out of the way of a group of overexcited children playing ball. 

A soft smile forms on Katara's face as her eyes linger on the children's faces. “Will my child be just like that?” 

“With the way your brother used to behave I'd say much worse,” Bato says with a smirk.

* * *

It takes a couple weeks before the resistance agrees to meet with her. The meeting takes place in an isolated boarding house near the agrarian zone of the city, late at night, when water tribe warriors, used to night campaigns, feel most comfortable. 

Bato stands in the dimly-lit room and begins speaking before the gathered members. “Thank you all for coming to this meeting and for your continued dedication to the cause. I would like to introduce Princess Katara, her brother has done great work for us for several months and I believe that Princess Katara can also aid our efforts.”

The members are men and women of various ages, clad in muted and dirtied green robes, symbolizing their status as workers in the agrarian zone of the city. She even recognizes some of them, officials and businesspeople from Agna Qel’a, those who were exiled or had family members imprisoned or killed for their open opposition to Chief Arnook. 

Katara looks at the angry faces, taking in the fact that they have every reason to distrust her, to hate her even. She stands before them and stiffly begins to speak. “I thank you all for giving me the chance to speak here. I have done many things that I am not proud of, that I wish I could take back but I can’t. All I do is help to try to end this war.”

Katara is about to continue when a young woman interrupts her. Katara’s eyes widen slightly in recognition. The young woman, Tuya, was a classmate of hers at the Royal Academy of Healing. Her mother, a well-known advocate for women's rights, fell from the great tower of the High Temple. It was ruled an accident but nearly everyone knew that she was pushed, that she was murdered. It doesn’t matter that it was likely an act done by an overzealous young royalist, Chief Arnook killed her. Shortly after her mother’s funeral, Tuya left the tribe and her remaining family members moved to an outer village.

With hard eyes, Tuya exclaims, “Things you aren’t proud of? Can you name them? Or did you lose track of your sins long ago?”

One of the elders, a way-worn old man, tries to convince Tuya to sit down. The young woman continues on, looking at the other members. “No! She is everything we are trying to fight against! She’s brought shame to our people and our ways.” Tuya narrows her eyes at Katara and with fierce judgement shouts, “Give me one reason why we should not give you up to the Earth Kingdom or the Fire Nation to face their justice?”

Katara is red-faced as she whispers, “I’m pregnant.”

It is as if the air has been sucked out of the room but Katara continues, “I don’t deserve your trust but I ask for the opportunity to earn it. I am here to help. I want my child to live in a better world, a peaceful world.”

Tuya’s face remains hard but she sits down and the meeting continues. 

Later as Katara and Bato leave to return to their apartment, Tuya runs after them. 

With gentle winter grey eyes, Tuya murmurs a soft apology. 

Katara shakes her head and says, “Everything you said about me is true. It is but I am changing.” The waterbender places a smooth hand on her stomach, “I am trying my hardest to be different.”

The northern woman nods in understanding and returns back to the boarding house. 

Katara turns and keeps walking under a starry-black sky. 

* * *

Bato finds a job at a bronze workshop two streets down from their apartment. The workshop specializes in creating vessels for ancestor rituals. He spends long hours shaping and decorating the clay models to shape the molds.

Katara works in a tea shop right next door to an Earth Kingdom-Fire Nation fusion restaurant. Occasionally customers complain about the strong spices and oils that linger in the air but she enjoys it, often smelling her clothes after her shift is finished. 

One of her coworkers, Jin, goes out of her way to invite Katara to gatherings and parties but Katara generally refuses the young woman, allowing her to believe that Katara is shy. The waterbender is far from shy, she is ashamed. Ashamed of who she is and what she has done. She doesn’t want to hurt anyone else like she hurt Song and Min-Ji, like she hurt Zuko and Aang. She has Bato and her baby and for now, that is enough. 

As her pregnancy progresses, she begins to wear baggier robes and dresses to help hide it. Not that she needs much help, her body has remained lean as her stomach grows. Her cheeks are fuller and her chin rounder but nothing that would make people notice that she is pregnant. Water Tribe women are usually open about their pregnancies, babies are a great blessing, a signal of the gods favor over their community but she is far from home. The people of the lower ring have turned gossiping into a sport and she does not want them to ask more questions about her background. A calm and open _uncle_ and his beautiful and aloof _niece_ garner enough attention as it is. 

As a girl, she was often annoyed when the female elders went on about pregnancy traditions, she had never truly imagined herself being a mother but now that she is one, she does her best to heed the lessons that she was taught long ago. When bathing, she makes sure to recite sacred words in the old tongue; she avoids lingering in doorways or stairwells; she reads poetry and legends aloud for her baby; she always straightens her mat before she sits down. 

For completing odd jobs around the neighborhood, one can be paid in goods or coin and whenever given the opportunity, Bato elects to be paid in books or scrolls. Because of this, Katara has a tiny nook in her room with romance scrolls, books on the Hao dynasty, poetry, a book on Fire Nation classic plays, and a book on ancient Fire Nation myths. 

One morning, as soft threads of morning light enter the apartment, Katara sings while she searches for a scroll to read. She runs her fingers along the covers of the scrolls and books, feeling the worn material until she stops at her father’s journal. She has yet to open it. 

Her father was the ideal warrior, the ideal chief, and the ideal father. After his death he became a symbol of what the war has stolen from them, motivation for their quest, and a gentle murmur in their ears. But he was a man, a man of their tribe and this age. 

What kind of things had he done? Was he cruel or violent or just and fair-minded as she was told? Would he truly have been ashamed of her?

Katara reaches for the journal but pulls her hand back, instead choosing to select a scroll of ancient poetry. She will read of her father’s life but not yet. 

Bato knocks on her door before sliding it open, hoping that she will join him for breakfast at Pao’s teashop with some of their neighbors but she won’t, she rarely ever joins him. His face falls as she assures him that she’ll be fine in their apartment with some fruit and jasmine tea. 

Bato’s face is sympathetic and his eyes soft as he says, ”You can’t live like this, without people. No man is an island.”

Katara looks up from the scroll and smirks, “It is good that I’m not a man.” 

The older man leans on the doorway and sighs before whispering, “I know you’ve been hurt and have hurt people but we all have, that is life.”

Life? No, it is not. The things that she has done and the way she did them are not normal. She has known that for a long time. She knows few other people who took such joy in hurting others.

The young woman fiddles with the sleeve of her sage robe before looking at Bato. “No, _Uncle._ What I’ve done is different, we both know that. Why pretend otherwise?”

“Katara-”

“Also, telling me that I need to be around other people? Rich coming from a man who left home to go live on a mountain alone.”

Bato’s lips press tightly and he looks like he is about to say something else but he doesn’t. He nods and turns away from Katara to walk out the door. 

Katara wants to be alone. When and why she became this way she is not sure. Maybe she feels that she deserves it, that this is the simplest way that she can punish herself. And it does feel like a punishment, dealing with the thoughts that come into her mind when she sits in the stillness of their apartment. Spirits, the angry, vicious thoughts that tear her apart like nothing else in this world. 

The waterbender clears her mind, remembering to think happy thoughts, not wanting to pass on her fears and anxiety to her child. 

So she opens the poetry scroll and begins to read: _Over the vast sea is rising up the moon bright_

* * *

Katara has no idea why she says yes to Jin’s invitation to go to the zoo but she does. Perhaps Jin’s persistence and happy attitude has finally worn her down, causing her to let down her walls slightly. 

Not long after they arrive at the zoo, a slight uneasiness comes over her. It feels like something or someone is watching them with significant interest but she pushes this feeling down, resolving to enjoy the day. 

As the breeze cools them, they sit on a bench, talking as they enjoy some peanuts. A young man swaggers towards them and speaks with a piece of straw in his mouth. “Is this your first time here?”

Jin opens her mouth to speak but before she can reply, Katara answers, “Why? Let me guess, you want to give us a special tour?”

Jin softly hits Katara’s arm with her elbow before looking up at the young man. “My name is Jin and she’s Mitsuki. What’s your name?”

He is cocksure as he runs a hand through his brown hair. “My name is Jet.”

* * *

Jet soon becomes a near-constant presence in her life. He and Jin drag her to the parks in the upper ring, to try different types of pastries and teas, to fly kites in the agrarian zone, and to attend the open air theater performances in the middle ring. 

She is curt with Jet, distant as he tries to get to know her. She knows that she should be nicer to him, he is fun to be around and goes out of his way to ensure that she is comfortable but she wishes that he would focus more on Jin. The young woman is affable and wants to be his friend, actually more than his friend. From their first meeting, Jin has been taken with Jet, eager to spend time with him. Katara thinks they would be good for each other. Jin is not bound to her past, to her secrets. 

Maybe if the world was different, if she were different, she and Jet could have been friends, maybe even more. But in this world, it doesn't matter how kind he is or how easy his smile is. His eyes will never be golden, his voice will never be low and raspy, and his skin will never be pale. Jet will never be the one person in this world that she wants, that she needs. 

One afternoon, Jin suddenly has an _emergency_ so Katara and Jet are left on their own, feeding turtleducks at a pond. 

“What happened to them?” he whispers. 

Katara shoots him a puzzled glance as she breaks off pieces of the bread. “Who?”

Jet tosses a piece into the pond. “The person who hurt you.”

The waterbender looks away from him, clutching the grass as she resists the urge to rub her stomach. “He’s not around, that’s pretty clear. Why do you even care?” 

He bites his lip before throwing more pieces to the quacking turtleducks. “Nothing, it’s just that you remind me of someone.”

Katara lets out a sigh, “I’m sorry. Anyone like me must not be all that fun to be around.”

He lets out a loud laugh and his dark eyes sparkle when he says, “No, he’s really not.”

They sit in silence as the birds chirp around them. 

Hesitantly, Jet murmurs, “I’m sorry.

Katara smooths down her skirt. “You shouldn't be. I hurt them too.”

* * *

There is a dull, sunless sky overheard as Katara walks through the upper ring with Jet and Jin. They are a few paces ahead of her, arms linked with bright faces, as they reach a large oak tree. 

Jin gathers wild flowers and places them in both Jet’s and Katara’s hair. Jet fiddles with blades of grass as Jin begs him to tell her about the friend he has joining them. The young man lays against the oak tree, refusing to reveal any information about his friend. Jin in faux-annoyance begins to throw grass at Jet’s face and he dodges her attacks. Katara laughs softly at the scene, eating almond cookies as they wait. 

They are startled by a loud swish sound then a thump as a boy falls out of the tree, his glider landing next to him. 

Katara, Jin, and Jet rush towards the boy to help him up as he brushes leaves out of his brightly-colored shirt and paints. 

Her pulse begins to race and everything begins to feel distant.

_Aang? What is he doing here? How does Jet know Aang? Does Jet know Zuko? Is Zuko in the city?_

She tries to remain focused, to not let her emotions overtake her. She manages to steady herself, hiding her distress, as Jet exclaims, “Aang! Are you okay?”

Aang continues brushing leaves out of his sleeves as he gives Jet a slightly embarrassed smile. “Sorry, Jet. I got distracted when I was trying to land.”

“By what?”

Aang glances at Katara and she is afraid that he is about to reveal her secret but he doesn’t. The sweet, sweet child holds her gaze to share a promise, a silent promise, to let her know that the bond between them still exists despite everything she has done to him. 

Aang’s calm eyes look away from her to look up at Jet. “A bird flew in front of me. I had to dodge it.”

Jin is absolutely giddy and begins to pepper Aang with questions about his favorite foods, games, and cities. 

Later, Aang and Jet walk them to the monorail station to say their goodbyes. To Jin’s great shock, Aang hugs her and promises to come visit her in the lower ring. As Jin and Jet look at the train routes, Aang grabs Katara’s hand to pull her to a distance where their words won’t be overheard. 

Katara blinks back tears as she struggles to find the words to say. Nothing feels good enough, worthy enough for this moment. 

Aang squeezes her hand and says, “I've missed you. I've missed you so much.”

Katara’s eyes shift, making sure that Jet and Jin are still looking at the map. “I've missed you too. I’m sorry, Aang. I’m so sorry for lying to you, for hurting you.”

Aang’s cheeks raise as he says, “I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago.”

She lets the tears fall as she whispers, “Why?”

“I unburdened myself from what you did. I let it go. It’s the way of my people.”

Katara thinks of the ruined temples, the stolen scrolls, and the many lies she and Sokka told him. “Well, maybe it shouldn’t be.”

Aang’s eyes turn sharper as he retorts, “But it is.”

Suddenly, the station is filled with noise and wind as the monorail enters the station. 

Wiping her cheeks, she whispers, “Aang, I have to go.”

The monk whispers back, “Tomorrow afternoon, can you meet me in the agrarian zone? We can talk more.” Seeing the hesitation in her face, he adds, “I won’t tell Jet the truth about you and I won’t tell Zuko that you are here.”

The wind is knocked out of her as she asks, “Zuko’s here?”

Aang nods and smiles. “He is. He misses you.”

Katara lets out a strange sound, halfway between a laugh and a sob.

“Mitsuki! Come on!” Jin shouts as the crowds begin entering the cars. 

Katara looks back at Aang and gives him a hug. “I’ll come see you.”

They part with a final squeeze of their hands before she turns to meet Jin. 

As the car begins to move, Katara exhales, watching the blurred clouds pass in the sky. 

* * *

Aang's laughter, a sweet and genuine sound, one that warms her from the inside out, a sound that Katara feared she would never hear again. Aang is light and joy incarnate; as he soars above the worries and concerns of life, she cannot help but follow along with him. As they are here, together, surrounded by dust and dirt, she feels freer and happier than she has in some time. Almost as happy as she was when....no! She won't think about back then, it wasn't real, none of that was real. 

She smiles as the nomad tells her of the places he has seen and the people he has helped. He tells her about Suki, Toph, Jet, Rinzen, the air nomads at the temple, Druk, and Momo. 

_Suki_ , her childhood friend, a girl with a wide smile, always ready to play a game or explore. A girl who befriended her and Sokka despite having all the reasons in the world to distance herself from them. Another person that she hurt, throwing her in prison for daring to fight for her people. Her mind struggles to process all of this. This large world is becoming much too small for her liking. 

_Aang and Zuko know Jet and Suki. Jet and Suki know Aang and Zuko. Jet, Suki, Aang, and Zuko know her (or at least a version of her)._

Aang places a hand on her lower arm and looks at her with concern. “Are you okay, Katara?”

No, she is far from okay. In a way, she hasn't been okay since the moment ~~Cheng~~ Zuko walked off that boat and changed her life forever. 

Katara swallows and tries to hide her distress. “I-uh, Aang- How is Zuko?”

Aang tilts his head from side and side and kicks at the dirt. “He's healthy, I guess. He's taught me more songs on the pipa and firebending, I've started learning firebending now. I have to wake up really early to meditate and he's not as nice to me as you were but he's much nicer than Toph is.”

Katara nods as Aang rushes to help her sit down on an empty porch as the day laborers, many of partial air nomad descent pass them by. Aang continues speaking, “He smokes sometimes but he tries really hard to hide it from me,” as he sits down next to Katara. 

The waterbender looks out at the flamed sky overhead and Aang's gaze follows hers. Softly, he says, “Zuko tries to pretend he isn't sad when he is, kind of like you.”

She exhales a soft breath as the blazed sun reminds her of Zuko's eyes. “Aang, I'm fine. You don't have to worry about me.”

The boy taps his feet in the loose dirt and they lock eyes, soft midwinter sky meeting a stormy sea. “Zuko says that too but I know you both miss each other. You both were happy when we were in the South Pole and I know that things are different now but I want you to come stay with us in the upper-ring. We can talk to Zuko together if you don't want to talk to him alone. Please?”

“I want to, Aang but I can't.”

“Why?” he asks and Katara can see how young he is, how much he hasn't learned yet about the world, about people. 

Katara pushes back wisps of dark hair, “A lot of reasons, Aang. Your people say that forgiveness is given and reconciliation is earned but other cultures believe differently. It's best if I stay away from Zuko, I don't want to hurt him again or make his life more difficult.”

“You won't, Katara. You've changed so much, you even look different. When Zuko sees you, he'll be able to see that too.”

Katara lets out a soft laugh, she looks different but not for the reasons that Aang thinks. “I'm going to have a baby.” 

The boy's eyes sparkle and he smiles brightly. “You are going to be the best mom in the whole world.” 

Tears rim her eyes as she whispers, “You think so?” 

“I know so.” 

* * *

He waits for her across the street from the tea shop. He doesn't speak and she doesn't either, he just takes her hand and they walk past the busy shops, the playing children, and the chattering elders. They walk until all the noise fades away and they are alone in the agrarian zone, save for the grass and the wind. 

Zuko lets go off her hand and springs back from her, his eyes intense like fire itself. 

“I’m so sorry for ever causing you pain. Zuko, I-” She reaches out to touch him and he increases the distance between them. 

Zuko lets out a breathy gasp before declaring, “I want you to stay away from Aang. Whatever plans you have for him aren't going to work, my friends and I will stop you.” 

“Zuko, please,” she whispers, holding out her hand towards him. 

“Stay away from Aang, Katara. I won’t tell you again. I will kill you with my bare hands before I ever let you bring more pain to that child,” he barks out, his jaw quivering in anger. 

“Zuko,” she says, her own voice sounding alien to her as she slowly walks towards him. Her hand shakes as she takes his hand in hers, pressing it to her stomach. “And what of your child?” 

“What?” Zuko breaths, his warm hand sending a shiver through her. Her body jerks slightly at his touch and his scent. Zuko is here, right in front of her. She hardly believes that it is truly him. Her heart leaps into her throat as she murmurs, “Your child grows in me. I know that your hatred of me will not lead you to harm them.” 

His voice is soft and light as his hand moves along the curve of her stomach, hidden beneath the loose fabric of her robe. “My child…” 

Her voice trembles as she says, “Our child.” 

“Our child,” he repeats with awe in his voice.

His eyes flutter shut as his arms wrap around her. “I thought you were dead. When I first saw you, I thought I was imagining you.” 

Katara feels wetness against her cheek and she isn't sure if the tears are hers or his, likely from the both of them, another things they share. “You didn't. I'm real, I'm here.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kind of all over the place with a lot of things happening. It's definitely not my best and I didn't really edit it but I wanted to post this so we can move onto the next stage of the story. I hope their reunion didn't disappoint.
> 
> P.S. The poem that Katara begins to read is called Viewing the Moon and Thinking of the Dear One Afar – Zhang Jiuling.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feelings are felt...yeah. 
> 
> It's been a while so here is a longer chapter than usual! Thank you all for the support :)

The moment they had shared passes, ebbing away like tide water. Everything shifts so quickly that if she hadn’t felt his touch, she would have thought she imagined it. The firebender stands at a slight distance, his body taut as billows of dust fly around them. “This doesn't mean that I trust you,” he rasps.

What reason does he have to trust her? Her sins have not flowed away like water instead they linger like blood on stone. It weighs on her and she could spend several lives trying and failing to outrun them. To him, she will always be the person who held his blood in her hands as she prepared to tear him apart. “I know,” Katara says, wrapping her arms around herself, feeling a chill go through her. 

“No, I don’t think you do,” he snaps, sharp golden eyes peering into hers. 

As much as she might want to, Katara does not turn away from his intense gaze. His anger is well-earned, and she cannot shy away from it. When it comes to him, she has nothing more to lose, there is nowhere further for her to fall. Katara likely will never gain his forgiveness or trust but she will try to earn it. “Zuko, what can I do to make you start to trust me?” 

His face softens and he lets out a low and slow breath. “I have a friend. She will know if you are being truthful. I hope for your sake that you are.”

* * *

The blind earthbender, _Toph_ , asks her a great many questions, including: _How did you survive the fall?_ _What did you do afterwards?_ _Are you here to hurt Aang or Zuko or anyone else? Are you sorry for what you have done? Are you spying for your people? How long have you lived here? Who are you living with? Why haven't you gone back to the North?_

The earthbender is firm in her questioning but Katara adapts and adjusts, answering them while revealing as few details as possible. She doesn't reveal anything about the resistance members in the city. She wants Zuko's trust, but she will not put the entire resistance movement at risk to get it. Zuko and his friends could easily report them to the Dai Li, ruining all their plans for the future. So, she will keep him in the dark until their relationship becomes less strained, (if it ever becomes less strained). 

Katara sits on the floor in a well-decorated room in the group's spacious upper-ring home and passes the time by pulling at loose threads in her sage robe. She leans her head towards the door, hoping to decipher what Toph and Zuko are speaking about in muffled voices on the other side of it. 

Zuko returns to escort her back to the lower-ring. He is silent, half-steel and half-shadow as they move through the busy streets. When they reach her apartment, his mouth is tight in unease, “Tomorrow I’ll be waiting for you after your shift.” Zuko doesn’t even give her a chance to respond before he turns away, blending into the sea of greens and browns. 

* * *

She doesn't understand how he does it. How he exists in this space, in this city. Yes, he dresses as the people do, his hair braided in the fashion of educated men with embroidered robes the color of textured soil, but he is like the sun for her, she can hardly look away from him yet to her garners little interest from her nosy neighbors. She does not see what he changes about himself. How he is able to hide himself, stifling something within his spirit to appear to be no one, to be nothing.

As they walk through the agrarian zone, she musters the courage to speak: “I want to know how you found me. I know that it wasn’t Aang.”

“You wouldn’t believe me,” he says, not even looking back at her. 

“Try me,” Katara says as her eyes look up at his broad shoulders. 

“My dragon,” the prince admits, slowing down to match her stride. 

She gives him a startled look. “What? How? Were you flying over the lower-ring and recognized me?”

“No, he recognized your scent; it lingered on me when I returned to the Fire Nation. One afternoon he smelled the same scent on Aang, so he told me.”

“Told you? He speaks? That is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.” 

“And yet, it is true.” 

He stops and blinks, his eyes turning light and sharp.

They are now surrounded by open sky, unwavering sun, and a thousand shades of dirt. 

For a moment they stare at each other in silence. 

“Why?” he asks, the strands of hair at his temple coming out of his neat braid. 

“Why?” Katara repeats, a line forming between her eyebrows. 

“You know,” he says hoarsely. Katara looks at his face and the angles are too sharp, he is tired. “Why did you try to kill me? What in Agni's name were you thinking?”

Katara doesn't bother attempting to hide the emotion in her voice. “You were right. Everything you said about me was right. I was so angry with you for taking away my control, for making me question my goals. I was angry that you weren't who I wanted you to be. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.” 

Zuko's face is neutral but his eyes shimmer with something, something she cannot quite read as his eyes land on her stomach. “The baby...it was that night...” 

Her mind begins to race so she answers questions he hadn't even asked. “I love our child so much; you are their father and I want you in their life. I will never use our child against you or your family. Or try to use them to get out of facing the consequences of my actions. Zuko, I'm so sorry. I'll work to earn your forgiveness; I'll do whatever you—” 

His breathing quickens and he interrupts her. “Please, just please. I never said you would use the baby as a ploy. I never even thought that.” His eyes shift and he looks past her. “I just—I can't.” 

Katara stands there as he walks away from her into the wind. 

She follows him and finds him looking out into a barley field. His dark hair looks brown in the sunlight. 

He looks over his shoulder at her and answers a question she has yet to ask. “You don't have to worry about going to prison. I won't see my child born in a cell.” 

The bright sun creeps towards the horizon and without speaking further, he escorts her to her apartment. 

* * *

A week passes before she sees Zuko again.

He takes her to the upper-ring, to the home he and Aang share with their group. They stand on the balcony of the house, overlooking the pebble and stone mosaics in the courtyard. 

“What am I doing here, Zuko?” Katara asks, shielding her eyes from the sun. 

The firebender blinks in the light before looking away from her. “There’s a disease going around in the lower-ring.”

Katara scoffs, “There’s always a disease going around in the lower-ring.”

“I don’t—” Zuko places his hands on the railing and bites his lip. The firebender lets out a low breath and mumbles, “Stay here.”

She tilts her head to look at him. “What? No, I’m not staying here.” Zuko doesn't trust her, he _hates_ her but he wants her to live in the same house as him? It doesn't make any sense. 

Zuko’s body stiffens and he furrows his brow. “You should stay here,” he says, softer than before, closer to a plea. “You are my wife and pregnant with my child, it would be dishonorable for me to not see to your welfare. Please allow me to do this.”

 _Of course! Honor, this is about his honor._ Why is she even surprised? He is from the Fire Nation, of course this would lead back to honor. A great many thoughts and feelings begin pounding through her mind and heart about their marriage and what he has done to her. 

The waterbender narrows her eyes at Zuko but remains a few steps away. “If I am going to consider living here, there are a couple terms you must agree to.”

“Name them,” he says. 

Katara begins, “The man I live with, he is like an uncle to me. He is living here peacefully, and no harm is to come to him. The Dai Li are not to find out about his true identity.” Zuko nods and she continues, “I expect to be able to leave the house whenever I wish to.”

“I agree to your terms but...is that all?” The prince asks, loosening his grip on the railing. 

“No,” she whispers as she approaches him, placing her hand on the railing (she is close to him but not close enough, never close enough). “I want you to remember that you asked me to stay here.”

There is a pause before Zuko's eyes find hers. Choosing his words deliberately, he says, “I am doing this for my child.” 

Katara gives him a thin smile. “I know.” 

* * *

She and Bato take tea in their compact apartment. Katara watches as Bato adjusts his body, trying to fit his knees under the too-small table. The older man speaks to her in low and serious tones about what she should do and what it will mean for her. 

“We spoke about honor, he wants to do the right thing,” Katara says, running her finger along the ridge of the cup. 

“What do you want?” Bato asks with downcast eyes. 

She smells the roasted and woody scent on the tea before taking a long sip, considering how to reply. Katara thinks back to the previous day—to Zuko's rough voice, the slope of his nose, and the way his eyes caught the sunlight. “What I want I'll never have,” she answers. 

* * *

The two women sit on Jin's tiny bed to look out the window, making up stories to go along with the people walking through the streets. A part of Katara envies the young woman, who in many ways reminds her of Aang. They share that same openness, a breeze of kindness that soothes and welcomes. Katara is like the sea, shifting from gentle to forceful in the space of several moments. Even now there is something pulsing and churning inside her chest, not anger but a great disquiet in her spirit. 

Jin watches Katara with curious, sympathetic eyes. She reaches over, taking Katara’s hand, “There is something going on, Mitsuki. I can tell. You don’t have to talk about it but-”

Katara takes a breath and brushes stray hairs out of her face. “Mitsuki isn’t my name.”

Jin tilt’s her head to the side and takes several pauses between her words. “Then what is? Who are you?” 

Who is she? She is not the Blood Princess, not anymore. She was banished, stripped of all her titles and accolades. She is clanless, without a bloodline or heritage to speak of. She is a traitor, a woman who defended an Earth Kingdom village against her own people. But she is not Mitsuki, the quiet tea shop worker either. Bato has made a life here with these people, he does not share his name or his past, but he has shared himself. She has not, she is incomplete here; something is still just out of her reach. The missing piece is known to her, but she is not sure that she even deserves it, not yet, at least. Then she remembers that Jin asked her a question, so she does her best to answer it, to fill in the cracks of Mitsuki, making her into a whole being and not a shadow. 

The waterbender tells Jin about a little girl who would stand at the shore, mimicking the pushing and pulling of the waves. A little girl who loved playing in the snow and helping others. How she grew into a woman and lived without living, hurting others and destroying things, hurting herself without even realizing it. Then she changed but only a little bit, refining and redirecting her might towards the same goal as before. Until one night, she fell into the sea and found herself again. And each day, she makes a choice to be better. 

By the time she is finished, tears rim her eyes and she looks over at her friend. Jin is silent for a long while, her body resting against the wall. “I didn’t know you before,” she says. “But you say you’ve changed...so who am I to say that you haven’t.” 

Katara lets out a laugh, one mixed with gratitude and disbelief. “You don’t hate me?”

“No.”

“Why?”

“You lied but it wasn’t about me, not really. You lied to protect your child. How could I hate you for that?”

Katara takes a deep breath, and then looks out in the cool night at the soft lantern light in the streets below them. 

* * *

Wands of moonlight settle across the fields as Katara and Tuya walk through the agrarian zone. 

“Tuya, what do you think of the Fire Nation?” Katara asks, running a hand through her loose hair. 

“Well, we were taught that they were violent, destructive, unruly…” Katara winces as Tuya speaks, remembering her lessons in school about how the Fire Nation’s flames needed to be tempered by their waves; how left to their own devices the Fire Nation would destroy the community that her people were building for the world. Tilting her head upwards, seemingly searching for patterns in the stars, Tuya adds, “But most of what we were taught were lies. Their ways are not our ways, but they are people, people who deserve our respect.” 

“Do you think we could reach out to them?” She matches Tuya’s stride, “We all have an interest in seeing Arnook removed from power. We could always use more allies.”

“Katara, you have to be joking!” Tuya scowls and stills her body. “You want us to reach out to the Fire Nation? They seek our destruction! They’ll use their comet to level the North Pole! I doubt even the South Pole is safe.”

As a young child, Sokka had nightmares about the comet, crying out in his sleep as if the flames were truly burning him alive. Their father comforted him, assuring him that they would win the war before that ever came to pass, but she knew that her father also feared its power, all Water Tribe people did. 

“The Southerners are their allies now.”

Tuya meets Katara’s eyes to question her. “But do you trust them?”

Katara thinks back to the election and Gilak, the intense hatred the leaders held for Arnook and their willingness to align themselves with the children of fire. The way Zuko and his father were accepted as brothers by the people. “I believe that they’ll stand by their word,” she maintains. 

The northern girl removes the scowl from her face but keeps a slight frown. “Good for you but what of my home?”

Katara looks at Tuya’s raven-black hair, being reminded of Zuko. He is an intense, relentless person, one who would not hesitate to scorch the very ground beneath his feet if it helped him achieve his goal. He could help destroy the North if he wished to. But then she remembers the way he risked his life to save those teenage boys, taking their punishment as his own. The dry, metal scent of his blood, his screams as the whip ripped his skin apart. He doesn’t hate her people; he reserved his hate for those who exploited and mistreated others like Silla and Arnook. And if he feels that way perhaps others in the Fire Nation do as well. He is not the heir to the throne but maybe if she convinces him, he could convince his relatives to not use the comet against the North. “The comet is over a year away, I believe if we remove Arnook from power, they’ll be willing to negotiate terms with us. We can’t continue living this way, look at the state of this world. People all over the world want peace, even if most of us have no idea how to achieve it.”

Glancing sideways at her, Tuya says softly, “When did you become such an idealist?”

A small smile quirks Katara’s mouth. “I think I’ve always been one.”

* * *

As Katara packs some items into a small bag, Bato hovers over her, much like her Gran-Gran did as the servants packed Katara’s belongings for her banishment. 

“Is this the right time for you to be doing this? Don’t you want to wait?” Bato asks, trying to keep his voice light. 

Katara places a scroll into her bag, “What are you really trying to ask, _Uncle_?” 

Bato sighs and takes a seat in a nearly too-small chair. “Think about what you are giving up.”

Katara begins gesturing wildly, bringing attention to their cramped apartment. “Giving up? I won’t miss the tea shop, not that much.”

Bato pulls at his loose hair, slumping in the chair. “Fine, let me frame it a different way. Think about what you are giving _him_.”

“I’m not giving him anything he doesn’t already have,” she tells him. 

“Really? He has your freedom?” Bato scoffs. 

“I’m not going there to be a prisoner. He's agreed to my terms and if something goes wrong...” she stammers, “I'll freeze him to the wall. I may not be able to do complex movements but I'm not totally defenseless.” Katara pushes her hair out of her face, “Anyway, this situation isn’t even about what is best for me. I know his feelings for me are not very positive right now and maybe I am being naïve, but I believe he cares for our child. And that means something—he won't harm me or allow anyone else to harm me.”

Bato furrows his brow, taking in what she said. “Why are you really doing this?”

“I've done so many terrible things that I don't even remember all of them. Most of the people that I have hurt, I'll never see them again, I'll never be able to attempt to make amends. But with Zuko and Suki, I can try.” Katara gets off her bed and approaches Bato. “I want to be someone my child can be proud of. I owe it to Zuko and Suki, to my child, to try.”

“Oh, Katara,” Bato exclaims as he stands up, pulling her into a hug. 

* * *

It is a mild cloudless day, but the tension feels so bitter and sharp that Katara wonders if she has been transported to Agna Qel’a, to Arnook's court with all of its factions and blood feuds. 

Before she can even speak, Aang envelopes her into a hug. “I’m so happy that you are going to be staying with us, Katara!” The waterbender places a gentle hand on Aang’s shoulder. _At least someone here is happy,_ she thinks as she looks at the faces of Toph, Suki, Zuko, and Jet—their expressions ranging from curiosity to discomfort to outright hatred. 

“Hi,” she begins softly, sweat pooling at her brow. “I'm sure you all know who I am and what I've done. I'm very sorry for all the pain that I've caused. I know I don't have the best track record of making the right decisions, but I've changed. What I was taught about the world, about the war, was wrong and I know that now.”

There is a long awkward pause as Katara tries to still the racing beat of her heart until Zuko clears his throat. Zuko's face is neutral as he looks down at Aang, only his eyes giving away the emotions swirling inside him. “Aang, please show Katara to her room.”

Aang ushers Katara out of the courtyard, the nomad almost buzzing with positive energy as he tells her about how Zuko took him to the shopping district to find items for her room and how they searched for blue fabrics. His pleasant chatter soothes her mind, cooling the tension in her body. Almost allowing her to forget the strange set of circumstances she has found herself in. 

* * *

That first night Katara sits in Aang's room, telling him of her mother’s childhood friend, Nini. At his age, he likely would be considered too old for such things but he is the Avatar with the war looming high above him, so she will do what she can to help him keep his sense of wonder and joy. She pauses the story to go use the restroom. As she makes her way back to Aang's room, she hides in the shadows, overhearing an intense argument between Zuko and Jet. Katara quiets her breathing as she watches the two men go back and forth, their faces partially illuminated by the moonlight. 

Jet stands a good distance away from Zuko, his voice taut in anger as he paces around the courtyard. “Zuko, what is going on with you? Why are you doing this? Maybe your brain froze in that wasteland you had to live in or maybe you are just thinking with the wrong head.”

Zuko approaches Jet, hissing, “I think you've forgotten who you are speaking to and who is in charge here. It definitely isn't you.” 

“No, I haven't forgotten.” Jet scowls as he points a finger at Zuko. “You are the guy who couldn't be bothered to pull out of a disturbed psycho-killer princess! She's a waterbender, you shouldn't trust a word out of her mouth! She should be in a prison cell not reading Aang bedtime stories. I might just send a letter to—”

Zuko grabs Jet's tunic and shoves him against the wall, steam coming out of his nose. “If you do that Jet, you will be dead to me! One word about what almost happened in Gaipan and you are ruined. I'll do that to you.”

“Ruin me? Why would that even matter? She's going to kill all of us in our sleep! Know that it'll be your fault.”

“Leave her alone, Jet. She's my responsibility, I won't let her hurt anyone.”

Unexpectedly, she is filled with an intense fury and no means of expressing it. Katara turns away, wanting to scream or cry or bend but she can't, not here and not now. So she returns to Aang's room, giving him a small smile as she sits at the foot of his bed. 

Aang looks at her, his eyes tight and worried. “Katara, are you okay? Your hand is shaking.”

The waterbender reaches over, squeezing his hand. “I'm fine,” she says, “Now, where was I? A month after the blizzard, Mom noticed she hadn't seen her friend Nini since the storm. So Mom and some others went to check on Nini's family...” 

* * *

Rising early, Katara spends the early morning in the garden, reading aloud a legend about a cowherd who falls in love with a weaver girl. 

Her voice is steady as she speaks of seven spirit sisters, a maiden weaving colorful clouds, and the cowherd who slays an ox to search for his wife in the spirit world. 

“That legend is sad, why are you reading it to your baby?” 

Katara tilts her head to see Toph laying against a stone barrier in the garden. 

Setting the scroll down in her lap, “I could tell you that I want my child to know that it is better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all but that would be a lie. I'm reading this because this is the only scroll I haven't read here.”

A soft smirk forms on the young woman's face and she rises to leave. 

The next morning Toph appears in the garden with a box of scrolls and books. “Thank you,” Katara says as she pulls out a scroll on the legend of the jade rabbit. 

Toph sits down across from her, taking off her bracelet and molding it into different shapes. “You know Sweetness, I can't believe you were as bad as people say.” 

“That's because I wasn't. I was even worse,” Katara says. 

* * *

Jet, Suki, and Zuko often spar, rotating pairs or fighting each other at the same time. Zuko and Suki were trained in various weaponry from young ages, with established masters. Jet picked up his hook swords on his own, training in the forests of the Earth Kingdom, creating his own unique style. In a fiercely contested session, Suki ended up falling poorly, leading to a sprained wrist. 

Katara is rarely asked to heal since most of their injuries are minor cuts and scratches but this injury in one where her assistance is necessary. 

“Ow!” Suki exclaims as Katara increases the pressure of the water on the sprain. 

“I'm sorry,” Katara says as finishes dealing with the injury, moving away from Suki. 

The warrior pushes her sweaty hair out of her face, “Thank you, Katara,” as she rises from the courtyard steps. 

“Suki, wait...I, uh, can we talk?”

Katara watches Suki pause and bite her lip before her face softens. “Okay,” she says as she sits down next to Katara. 

“You were my friend, my best friend. I cared about you so much then everything changed for me. When my dad died it was like the world ended. Then it began again...I wish I could say that I didn't know what I was doing or that I didn't enjoy it but I did. I thought I was saving the world, creating a brighter future but I was wrong. I wish I could take it back.”

Suki shallows and begins to speak slowly. “Do you know what happened to the other Kyoshi warriors after you and Sokka came with your division?”

“No,” Katara murmurs as a wave of guilt overtakes her. 

Suki looks away from her into the distance. In a near-whisper, she tells Katara about how they were all separated, taken to different prisons across the Earth Kingdom and the tribes. How after months in prison she began to lose herself, how she has gaps in her memory. How she doesn't even remember being transported to her prison on the Southern coast on the Earth Kingdom. How she and Zuko have tried for months to track down many of the warriors, trying and failing to find traces of them in documents stolen in raids. Suki lets out a shaky breath. “I see that you're trying to be different, to be better and I respect you for that but it will take me time to forgive you. I can't help but feel that this change came at my expense. You and Sokka were my friends, my best friends, I loved you both so much. You chose an idea, a false idea, over me and that hurts.”

“I'm so sorry,” Katara says, looking into Suki's eyes. “After the baby is born, I'll do what I can to help Kyoshi, to help you find the other warriors. That's a promise, Suki.”

The warrior nods before leaving the courtyard. 

* * *

Jet approaches her in the hallway, his face tight in anger.

Katara speaks softly. “Jet, I’m sorry about lying to you. You were a good friend to me; I just wasn’t ready to tell you the truth about my life.”

“You might have Zuko and Aang fooled but I don’t buy it,” Jet says, narrowing his eyes at her. “I’m going to keep my eye on you.”

From what she has gathered from Aang and the conversation she overheard between Jet and Zuko, Jet hates her because of her blood and her family. He wants her to suffer as his people have but she cannot, that is impossible. She is working to make amends for her past but her mere presence angers him, he likely will never be comfortable around her. Now that her child grows within her, she lives and dreams for them; she does not care if Jet ever accepts her. Katara tilts her head. “You’ve had your eye on me since the moment you met me. I think I'm used to it by now.” She walks away from him, heading into her room.

* * *

Her first weeks in the house pass without incident. She lives at the periphery, the others existing in their own world and she in hers with Aang, Toph, and occasionally Zuko entering her world. She does not mind this, she understands. At least now she is around people who know her true identity. Her identity being known even if she is not completely accepted is something that she never thought she would appreciate, but now she does. Zuko seems to be quite busy, he is often in and out of the house with Suki, Jet, or Toph, doing La-knows what. They whisper behind closed doors, planning things, things she will never be privy to. When he is around, he is open with Aang and Toph, laughing and playing games in the gardens. He stays up late into the night, playing cards with Jet and Suki, drinking fire whiskey. With her, he asks after her health and about their baby each day, reading up on scrolls about childcare and pregnancy. He buys her things-clothes, scrolls, combs, and shell games, but he mostly keeps his distance. 

She and Aang eat breakfast in the gardens, sitting under a grand oak tree. In the afternoons, after his training with Zuko and Toph, they sit in a nearly-bare room in the house, passing orbs of water back and forth as they talk. 

One morning, she wanders the estate and finds herself in the stables. In a corner, Zuko’s dragon, _Druk,_ is coiled tightly as he sleeps. In awe, she takes in the bright crimson scales of the dragon. Suddenly, the creature opens its golden eyes to look directly at Katara. The animal is large and imposing but Katara has no fear as he approaches her. Gran-Gran had told her tales of ancient dragon-riders to lull her to sleep during the polar nights and she never imagined that she would ever see one up close. In respect to the majestic creature she bows her head.

The dragon lowers its head and Katara reaches out, touching the smooth but rough scales. 

He is telling her something, maybe about Zuko or even herself but she doesn't understand him, there is so much she does not understand. 

She closes her eyes and breathes. 

* * *

Golden petals move freely in the wind as Katara walks through the upper-ring of Ba Sing Se. As a surprise, Katara purchased items to bake egg custards for Aang. Before she enters the house she brushes the petals off her shoulders and out of her hair. After she is finished in the kitchen, she goes out into the garden. to sit by the koi pond. 

Walking through the greenery, the scent of the peonies, camellias, and the orchids hit her nose. She walks towards the pond and pauses as she sees Zuko sitting there, his hair covered in golden petals. She steps onto a fallen branch and Zuko twists his head to look at her. “You can sit here, I was just leaving.” 

“Zuko, please. We are going to be parents, we should be able to share the same space. How else will we raise our child?” she says each word slowly, pausing to gauge his reaction. 

“Yes...our child.” Zuko stares into the pond, looking at the brightly-colored koi. 

“Do you not want this child?” she asks into the soft breeze. 

“I do. I've always wanted a child,” he murmurs as the koi flex back and forth in the pond. 

“But not with me. You must feel that your child will be tainted by me,” Katara accuses. She knows that she has no right to be angry with him, not over this, but she feels it, threatening to overtake her. 

He is not angry, maybe he has no anger left in him. Maybe the fire in him has gone out and all he has left inside is ashes. “No, that's not what I—I don't want to fight, Katara.” 

“Fight? You don't even speak to me! I barely exist to you.” Katara says that too desperately, too openly. Her heart is bleeding and though she bends blood, she's never tried to bend her own. 

Zuko brushes the petals out of his hair and sighs, “It's safer this way, Katara. You might now see that now but you will.” 

She closes her eyes, concentrating on feeling the pond water. She exhales, “Safer for who, Zuko? Who are you trying to protect because it isn't me...” 

He lets out a laugh, a joyless one. “Fine, Katara! You've got me, you have me all figured out! I've had people trying to kill me since the day I was born. I've been hurt in battles since I was young, I know pain and I know it well but you—Spirits, you’ve hurt me in a way no one else has ever hurt me before and I won't apologize for not wanting to feel that again!” 

“I'm sorry.” Her hand inches towards his and she lets out a soft breath when he allows her to put her hand into his. She interlocks their fingers and looks over at him, his eyes have fluttered shut.

She marvels at how warm he is. He is fire, he has never not been fire. He has been burning her alive since she first laid eyes on him. 

They continue holding hands, breathing together. 

Speaking in hushed tones, she tells him, “What would you say if I told you that I still loved you? That I don't think I could ever stop loving you.” 

He leans over, rasping into her ear. “If you told me that I would tell you to put me out of your mind. You don't know all the things I've done or the things I am still doing.” 

Her throat holds back a cry and she pleads, “Then tell me. Please? You know my sins, I will not judge you.”

“I've made vows to things much greater than myself. It is not that I don't wish to tell you, I can't. Forgive me for that,” he breathes before pressing a kiss into her hair. 

She sits, crying as Zuko embraces her. “Please, let me take you back to your room.” 

“No! Go! Leave me, please.” Katara begs. 

He rises and presses another kiss into her hair as a silent apology.

She doesn't watch him walk away. 

* * *

She finds her way back to her room and rummages through a drawer, searching for something, something she should have read long ago. 

Katara lets out a long breath and settles on her bed, under her warm sheets. 

Wiping her eyes as she opens the tattered and worn book. _Dad, I miss you so much,_ she thinks. 

The first page is crude sketches of sea animals: arctic hippos, tiger seals, and koalaotters. As she runs her fingers over the drawings, a sense of comfort comes over her.

She flips the page and begins to read. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Zuko, oh confused, conflicted, angsty Zuko. The things that he wants are in direct conflict with the other things he wants regarding his duty to his family and people. I’m not going to tell you all to not be upset with him, I just hope I left things open where you all can read between the lines of his actions/words. 
> 
> I am so interested in hearing everyone’s thoughts on this chapter. It took me a while to write this one and I hope the wait was worth it. Thank you all for the support.
> 
> *Next chapter will solely be about Hakoda's diary!!!!*


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